Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU NO CONTACT

11 replies

Boyoboyo · 12/09/2024 13:00

AIBU to end my relationship with partner of 2.5 years (live together) and cut all contact ?

I will be moving out immediately but I know partner will want to talk numerous times about why I don’t want to be with them etc, hence the cutting all contact. Is this harsh?

OP posts:
BarbedButterfly · 12/09/2024 13:03

I think as long as you give them a reason when you break up then it is fair enough. Hard to say really without knowing why, but I would usually give a little closure and then cut contact.

toomuchfaff · 12/09/2024 13:04

You don't owe them any explanation - the reason you want to end the relationship can be as simple as "i want to end the relationship" - simple as - end of story.

Its only for their benefit they want to discuss - to change your mind, to drag it out, to still see you, to understand why etc. and in reality that is no longer your concern and not something you need to give them. Harsh but true.

Aquamarine1029 · 12/09/2024 13:05

They may feel it's harsh. That's not your problem. If kids aren't involved, I a strong believer in letting it be over and moving on with your life. You've ended the relationship, you're moving out, there's nothing else to discuss.

Original poster
Boyoboyo · 12/09/2024 13:06

BarbedButterfly · 12/09/2024 13:03

I think as long as you give them a reason when you break up then it is fair enough. Hard to say really without knowing why, but I would usually give a little closure and then cut contact.

Reasons are due to them been very insecure / needy, checks my phone, dislikes me seeing friends/family alone, wants to know what I’m doing all the time, very up and down in their mood, treats my daughter differently to their own child to name but a few

OP posts:
MissUltraViolet · 12/09/2024 13:06

It would probaby be decent to give some idea of why you are leaving, but to cut contact after that and refuse any discussion about it is fine, totally your choice.

Original poster
Boyoboyo · 12/09/2024 13:06

Aquamarine1029 · 12/09/2024 13:05

They may feel it's harsh. That's not your problem. If kids aren't involved, I a strong believer in letting it be over and moving on with your life. You've ended the relationship, you're moving out, there's nothing else to discuss.

We both have kids but not to each other

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 12/09/2024 13:06

Boyoboyo · 12/09/2024 13:06

Reasons are due to them been very insecure / needy, checks my phone, dislikes me seeing friends/family alone, wants to know what I’m doing all the time, very up and down in their mood, treats my daughter differently to their own child to name but a few

Show quote history

Then you already know the answer. Get away from them and cease all communication.

DadJoke · 12/09/2024 13:09

It’s not unreasonable for him to want an explanation if he doesn’t already know. Either way, cutting him off with or without an explanation is fine.

MaterCogitaVera · 12/09/2024 13:42

Once you have split up, your ex has no further right to your time or energy. You are no longer the right person to offer them support or advice or answers. If they need to talk things through, they should do so with a friend or counsellor. If you want to give him an explanation, maybe you could write your reasons down as factually and unemotionally as you can. If he then asks for answers or to discuss the reasons you left, you say “I wrote it all down for you and I have nothing to add beyond the reasons I gave in that list”.

Janeir0 · 12/09/2024 14:05

Your update changes my opinion, fuck him and block him.

Original poster
Boyoboyo · 12/09/2024 23:16

Thanks for the replies

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page