Pregnant needing advice

[Dippydoopy]

posting for traffic also posted in chat

As the title says I recently found out I am pregnant.
I have been married to my husband for 11 years, we have 2 DC (6&7)

we don’t live anywhere near family, think other side of the world.

i had my IUD removed around a year ago as I was having health issues with it. Husband knew all about it, I asked him to get a vasectomy he said no as he was scared and said we would just track. Knowing full well that isn’t 100% effective!

fast forward to now I am 6 weeks pregnant and he wants me to get a termination. I understand why and agree with his fears but I have cried everyday since finding out, it has made me unwell as I just can’t see a way out.

he is accusing me of our current children not being enough.

I have booked the appointment but I am literally sick to my stomach about it.

so any advice is greatly appreciated

Do you want another baby? Would you have wanted another baby had you not accidentally gotten pregnant? Do you want to stay in your relationship? If you were to not terminate and leave your husband, what impact will this have on the children you already have?

A termination at this stage can be carried out with pills, at home, and isn’t necessarily painful or traumatic in a physical sense. But it depends whether it’s what you really want to do.

In all honesty yes I would love another child.
I have wanted another child for years.
My husband also says many times that he would want another child but changes his mind due to his fears of rocking the boat.

leaving my husband isn’t an option here, that’s something I definitely do not want.

Your husband is emotionally manipulating you. Don't let him. He was 50 percent responsible for the pregnancy occurring he doesn't get to dictate that you under-go a medical procedure when he wouldn't undergo one to prevent the pregnancy happening in the first place.

Don't let him force you into a termination if you don't want one- you'll never forgive yourself or him.
He's being a cunt. He should have had the snip if he was so against having more.
That's awful to say your current children are not enough.

This was me back in June.
We went through with the termination and it was not the right decision for me.
We've spent the weeks since talking and he has now said he does want a baby - it was horrible timing in June due to a death, terminal illness diagnosis and other family drama and he simply shut down and couldn't cope... logically I understand his decision then and him changing his mind.
Emotionally it hurts, we've agreed to try, but I get upset when he talks about names and the idea of morning sickness again, I was 9 weeks when I had the termination and I keep tracking where I would have been.

In your position with polar opposite views I'd say cancel your appointment. Talk to him and really think/focus over the next couple of weeks before deciding what to do.
There is no right or wrong decision only what is best for you