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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...or should we go on a shared villa holiday with my parents and MIL?

4 replies

Thankyouandgoodnight · 19/04/2008 11:23

My mum has said again (she has mentioned it every now and then over the years), that she would love to hire a villa and we all holiday together.

MIL lives abroad and we use up approx. 1-2 weeks of our annual leave seeing her each year with either us going there (which I loathe but do very gracefully) or her coming here. Lovely though she is, she's a couch potato and is happy to just admire DD and drink tea.

Prior to DD it would have been my worst nightmare to holiday with my parents - my dad is ok but my mum is very intense and moody and I can't stand the way she speaks to everyone and I usually try to keep meetups very short - few hours or a day at most as I find it SO stressful.

Now then, it would be a HUGE sacrifice on our part (I think more mine as I find my mum so difficult) to do this and it would be purely to esuage the guilt I feel about only seeing my parents out of duty and for DD to get to know her extended family better. DH leapt down my throat when I mentioned it as an idea but then quickly realised that I put myself through the same thing with his mum every year, year in year out and said he would do it. I was thinking it would have to be all of us when MIL is over to save on annual leave and safety in numbers etc. BUT I essentially still do not want to do this - what do you think?

OP posts:
ecoworrier · 19/04/2008 11:25

I wouldn't. You find a few hours stressful, do you really want a whole week or fortnight of it?

Thankyouandgoodnight · 19/04/2008 11:31

assuage!!!!!!

OP posts:
pinkteddy · 19/04/2008 11:39

If you do it I would make sure that you have your own accommodation so that you have your own space and also make it clear that you will occasionally want to do your own thing and no-one is to take offence. Otherwise I think you are setting yourselves up for disaster. I know very good friends who have gone on holiday together in the same villa and ended up hating one another! It can work and you never know, in laws and/or parents might take dd off your hands for a few hours and allow you to have a night out!

TurkeyLurkey · 19/04/2008 11:39

Sounds like a nightmare, I wouldn't go. If you can only tolerate your mum for a day how on earth will you do it for a week or fortnight.

Sounds like the holiday might do more harm than good to your relationship to be honest.

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