For people to use ear buds or head phones at home or in the office

[Whyhaveibeencutoutofmamsnot]

Why do people have these things in or over their ears when they are at work (not those being worn for health and safety reasons) but listening to music or podcasts in the office and in a job where they need to answer the phone or work questions from colleagues. It may help them concentrate on emails or working on a document etc and want to get on with it without disruption - we would all like that but unfortunately human contact is part of the job where I work.
DH does this at home as well - and all very well on the odd days he is home on his own - I work outside home full time and we do need to talk sometimes without the look of stop disturbing me.
Am I being unreasonable in objecting to ear buds?

Background noise can make it hard to focus.

If I need to speak to colleague with headphones in I would just go and stand where they could see me.

I do it when I need to focus and I don’t want to answer other peoples questions! 😂

You’re being unreasonable for saying they should never be worn. They have a time and place.

Where I work (open plan) people do this to concentrate and no one seems to miss calls or conversations because of their headphones. Sometimes they are the only way to drown out the inane chitchat by certain people.

I like it when my DP wears them round the house as the alternative is him listening to his podcasts and music out loud. He is someone who needs background noise to concentrate and I’m the opposite so this works for us. I wave if I need to catch his attention!

Do you talk a lot, OP? I often find that the people who object to this sort of thing are very extroverted and require lots of engagement, so take the lack of it as a personal affront.

Personally, I’ve never found wearing ear phones (by others or myself) an issue at home or in the workplace. When I need their attention, I tap/signal/wave/email, as appropriate. And vice versa. It’s not a big deal.

I wear them at.home and at work, at the right times. My kids don't need to hear the swearing on podcasts that I listen to. And I need to block out background noise when I'm at work and the office is busy.

I don't see why you're concerned with other people's lugholes

I suspect your thread should be about your marriage op

I wear them in the office when I need to concentrate and I can't because of people nattering on around me.

Your 'need to talk' doesn't usurp other people's need to focus.

I have tinnitus. I can't concentrate unless I have another sound in my ears blocking it out. I can still hear people speaking to me, it's not like I am isolating myself.

Your husband is working from home and being considerate using headphones. How is it of benefit to his employer if he removes his headphones to listen to his wife during working hours.

I have never seen anyone listening to a podcast on their headphone in a customer facing role?

He's at work. You shouldn't be talking to him until he finishes work for the day.

People wear them so they can focus on their work. I suspect that if other people wearing earbuds is an actual problem for you, you interrupt people’s work more than you need to.

I work from home three or four days out of five and I listen to stuff all the time (albeit without headphones). When I’m in the office, I will use earbuds if I really need to concentrate on writing (the bulk of my work is writing and editing stuff). If someone really needs me urgently, they can still interrupt me. That’s fine.

I don’t actually wear earbuds to stop people from talking to me; I wear them to block out other people’s chat, phone calls etc that go on around me. But if the earbuds do also deter people from asking me random, non-urgent questions about things they could have found out for themselves, so much the better.

I wear them to block out background noise as I work in an open plan office. I also work in a sector where there is a lot of discussions about work that you can easily get drawn in to even if they're nothing to do with you. As such, AirPods are a way of making it clear that I'm concentrating. I am very easily distracted and without them I'd never be able to focus on my own work.

It's not like I'm blaring music, it's at a level where I can still hear my phone and be aware that someone is trying to get my attention.

I wear them a lot. I’m an introvert and it helps me concentrate. I wear them in the supermarket to drown out screaming children and in the hope
that no one will speak to me.

YABU - I can hear people asking me questions like you would over the sound of a radio.

After 3 years of WFH I'm really struggling to adjust to being in an office. I'm totally uninterrupted at home and can concentrate, despite having the radio on, and get way more work done. In the office I can't concentrate with lots of different conversations going on around me, it distracts me so much. So I put my headset on with white noise on.

I wear one earbud when I need to focus. It helps me to concentrate, and do mindless tasks like loading the dishwasher, which I'd otherwise get distracted from.

Theres always someone hollering into the phone in the office (well teams call now but it's the same effect). This despite the fact we have a room people are meant to move to for long teams meetings.

So I use them so I can hear myself think.

I always take them out if someone wants to talk to me though

@Whyhaveibeencutoutofmamsnot

I understand.

it stops natural communication. It makes you have to decide whether it's 'important enough' to disturb someone for. Like in the car, I might point out to the teens 'oh look a red kite' which they'd enjoy seeing, but if they're all 'plugged in' I don't feel it's worth getting them to pause to listen to me (and the red kite is probably no longer there) and just general chit chat with DH at home. I find it anti social.

I don't mind if someone's working & trying to concentrate though.

I think it sends a very clear “do not disturb” message. I hate if dh wears his in the house or garden when I’m around too. It’s like he’s deliberately trying to block me out and discourage interaction (given we’re not home together often at all I really don’t like that feeling).

@Whyhaveibeencutoutofmamsnot

we do need to talk sometimes without the look of stop disturbing me

yeah the eyeroll or sigh & huff.

I don't work in an open plan office there are perhaps three or four in each room working on same type of stuff, most of which are designated quiet rooms to reduce error risks so no idle chat. It's just that there are a significant minority who seem not to want to answer the phone or make decisions on queries.
It is difficult trying to communicate with these people as they don't hear their names being called and they are looking at screens so quite hard to flap my arms and dance in front of them.
Btw DH is not working by the time I get home.
Perhaps I ought to join them and ignore the phone and requests for decisions as well.

We don’t allow them around the house. It’s rude.
But in the office they are useful for canceling out distracting noises. I would of course take them off if someone needed my attention, to greet someone arriving etc.

I'm neurodiverse and get far more done with them than I would without. I've never missed a call or important conversation but equally am not disturbed by inane (to me) idle chit chat.

Yabu, live and let live

Sometimes I wear mine when I'm not listening to anything just so people don't talk to me!