Been separated from ex for a few years now. Only been in his house twice. Both times the house was mucky, smelly, etc. I used the toilet on one of these times and the bathroom was even worse than the other rooms. Layer of scuzz on the sink and bath, toilet stank and was badly stained and yucky, visibly dirty laundry all over the floor, etc.
He looked visibly awkward and put on the spot about it and hasn't invited me in since. Which I'm not overly bothered about, most handovers are at mine not his so there's very rarely a reason I'd need to be in his house and I've no desire to be.
When the kids went round even if they'd only been with him a few hours they'd come home with an awful smell clinging to their hair and clothes. In the end I broached this with him and asked if it was a damp problem (I figured this angle would cause least offence). I felt I had to mention it as I didn't want them going to school from his house smelling!
After that I noticed gradually they weren't coming home stinking so much and was relieved. But I'm aware the house is still not great from the kids comments.
My problem is that my youngest won't poo at his dad's. He came home from school yesterday after being at school and then his dad's for the night then day before and was really badly backed up and had to sit on the loo for ages.
He said his dad's toilet is brown and smelly and he doesn't like to sit on it. Which sounds like what I witnessed the time I asked to use the loo. 😢🤮
The kids only sleep there one night a week, and go two other times just for a few hours. But on the sleepover day it's midweek so there's a full day of school either side of it where ds also won't poop.
Do I broach this with the ex? And how?!
We generally are polite and pleasant to each other but he was upset with me recently about another issue that came up and I know he won't take it well. 🙄😔