Mum waiting for another Mum before letting kids go in

[ToThinkthisisokay]

Today DH dropped dd at school this morning, and a Mum of dd's friend said she was waiting for another Mum before she would let her child go in. Her dd is good friends with my dd, and they are all friends, it is a very nice group.
Dh said he thought it was strange, because the Mum had asked her dd if she was okay to walk in with our dd, and she said yes, and was chatting away. she still however made her child wait, the teachers were on the door, and it was time to go in.
They are in reception, and all seem confident kids. Dh thinks it wasn't a nice thing,and felt as though dd wasn't good enough for her child to walk in with.

Is this normal behaviour? Dh thinks it is OTT, and abit weird. I really don't know the reason, but I just always let my dcs go in! Am I weird?

Don't think anyone is weird. Sure the mum had her reasons and don't think it was a bad reflection on your dc

Maybe she'd promised the other mum they'd wait because the other child was struggling?

If she had arranged it with the other parent, it would be off to then send her child in with someone else. Maybe both children were nervous. I really wouldn’t think anything of this situation.

That is a good point, and I told dh this. He said if this was the case she wouldn't have asked her dd if she was okay to come in with ours.

This is my immediate thought as well.

Sorry I don’t understand, she’s asked the DD if she would be ok to walk in with yours but then still made her wait?

Yes I've told dh it was probably that, he was just a little confused at her asking her dd, who was more than willing to go in.

Yes, this exactly. This is why dh thought it was strange. He said surely she would just have said "oh X was nervous yesterday, so we are waiting." It didn't make sense to ask her dc.

I think he’s over thinking it all.

Did you daughter have a good day at school.
If so thats all that matters.

It’s probably more to do with the parents friendship than the child’s. so the mum was waiting for the other mum rather than her child waiting for her other friend.

Probably, dd just ran in oblivious to it all. My older daughter's year have been very clannish from a young age, so much so they had to split their classes up, and they never do that. Maybe that is why dh thought this, i don't know. I kiss encourage dd to be friends with everybody; they are only 4!

Good point if that's the case, I don't agree with her making the little girl wait when she clearly wanted to go in. She could have just waited herself. She could be trying to get to know the other mum better, I suppose, and went about it in this way.

Yes thank you she did, she loves it. She hasn't looked back!

I agree. The reason I suggested it is because there’s a mum in my child’s class who does it every morning - often making her child late in the process, with her child shouting at her ‘why can’t we just go to school now, mum! Some people are quite selfish like that.

Maybe they had agreed in advance that their girls would go in together. If so, it would be rude not to wait. I don’t think it’s anything to do with your DD but perhaps if the friend wasn’t showing signs of arriving, your DD was a back-up plan and that’s why she asked. Sounds like the woman’s daughter was nervous about going in, that’s all.

Two scenarios spring to mind, 1. The other child's mother had asked if they could walk in together. 2. She wanted to speak to the other child's mum and didn't want to hang around outside alone, waiting with your child for someone seems easier

You're giving this far too much head space.

Haha yes, it does seem this may be the case! The poor little girl was dying to go in. The teachers were looking, and Dh said it all was a bit dramatic. Dh thinks all of this can sometimes scare kids more, like it is something to fear by making such a big fuss. Luckily dd was unfazed!

It is ridiculous to make your own child late for the sake of walking in with a certain child - it’s more to do with the parent’s wishes than the child’s and if I was the teacher I’d be a little annoyed.

Yes, that is exactly what dh said, he thought the teacher looked a bit confused by it. They're so good with any nervous kids, and they don't encourage drama at the door, as it makes them worse.

Well it may make me awful, but dd won't be waiting for anybody, and will continue to go straight in.