Does anyone’s new high schooler not have a phone?

[Merryoldgoat]

My son is starting high school next week - he’s going to a specialist ASD school which is one short bus ride away - stop is about 20m from home and stops outside school.

I am trying to avoid mobile phones for as long as possible - anyone else got a pre-teen who is without a phone?

I could be persuaded to get him a basic phone just for calls and texts if it was felt necessary.

Would appreciate any advice and viewpoints.

My year 6 primary age child just got a (hand me down, barely works) smart phone this summer. Its securely locked down via family portal and i check it weekly. Barely uses it. I wanted the tracker on her as she is walking to and sometimes from school without me now. Works for us

Round here most kids get phones in the last year of primary school but that’s partly because in secondary school most walk some distance to and from school and so have them for safety. The general view is that if they have them the year before they need them the boundaries around use can bed down.

One of my daughter’s friends still has a very basic model going into year 11. It is inhibiting -she can’t join in on WhatsApp which their friendship group use and so does get a bit left out of the group chat.

But most of this is due to social pressure. If your child is attending a specialist ASD provision, I don’t know if there would be quite the same expectation to have a phone as in mainstream schools.

My daughter still doesn't have a phone and she starts secondary school this week. I make many parenting mistakes but choosing to not give her a phone in primary school has been my best decision yet! Saying that, I think we'll probably get her one in the next couple of months but make it as boring as possible - no social media, WhatsApp, using it after a certain time. Working in a school I've seen the damage they can do to a young persons self esteem.

Ok thank you. Some varied opinions.

I suspect there won’t be the same pressure but I want him to make friends and be able to
contact them as he gets older.

I would quite like the idea of tracking him on his school run as he’ll need to get a bus alone but it’s quite close so the potential for trouble is small. Also they start and finish earlier so I think that will help miss some of the possible flash points.

Urgh. It’s so hard.