To ignore ex friends behaviour?

[showmetheworldd]

I decided to end my friendship with this person. Numerous reasons why, constantly let me down, would call when she wanted to discuss her relationship, invited me on a big trip away, we started planning, I got time off work and then she uninvited me (it was to stay with her family in Texas so weird if I’d still gone, thankfully this was the day before I booked the flight)

Basically she needs her own thread, but it came to a head when she owed me money (£110ish) and started to avoid me when I asked to meet up, never mentioned paying me back. I wrote off the debt, learnt my expensive lesson and moved on.

We’ve seen each other once since then, by accident, we ended up in the same bar, neither of us approached the other and I left after maybe 20 minutes. This was ages ago, like June.

This morning my phone rings, I don’t recognise the number and I don’t answer it. I then get a WhatsApp saying “what is wrong with you??” Which instantly got deleted. Realised it’s said friend (whose number I had deleted). It’s again draining behaviour and just attention seeking and also quite aggressive? Aibu to continue to ignore her?

I'd reply and say "what is wrong with me? Unless you're contacting me to pay my £110 back, please fuck off."

Yanbu, but I’d request the money owed back asap.

There’s no point. I’m not getting it back.

Why on earth would you be unreasonable to continue to ignore someone who repeatedly behaved badly towards you?

What's wrong with me? "I have a habit of picking shitty friends" would be a response lol. If you've excepted the loss of money just block her. No need.to keep contact open.

Just block the number so she can't get through to you, deleting it isn't enough.

@showmetheworldd Well if you don't at least ask for it then you certainly won’t get it back! She will presume you don't want it.

Also, I'm not sure flouncing out of the bar and sulkily deleting her WhatsApp is the most mature approach. Have a conversation with her like a grown up and tell her how she makes you feel. It doesn't mean you're under any obligation to continue the friendship, but it means that it ends with you each knowing the score and learning from it.

I think I know her twin sister...

I would message or whatsapp if you think you are unlikely to get an uncivil response. Saying by the way incase you still owe me £110?

She is then likely to stay well away or you may find the money pushed through your maybe with or without an apology. But she needs to know that she still owes you the money.

I’d write “I’m £110 poorer and some idiot’s playing mind games.”

Either do nothing or block her - no point in engaging if you don't want her in your life any longer - you'll just be giving her an opportunity.

Where did you get the idea that the OP has “flounced”? She just has boundaries!

I assumed that the ex friend deleted the WhatsApp message

Who said I flounced out of a bar? Some people on MN really love to write their own narratives. The thing about bars is people sometimes finish their drinks and move on to the next places.

And as someone already pointed out the obvious. She deleted her message to me.

I’ve already had a conversation with her 2 years ago and told her how she makes me feel, and things changed for a couple of months and then went she just reverted.