Decluttering - should small clothes stay or go?

[Waytoomanycoasters]

Help me out here Mumsnet, can't tell if this is a hill I should die on or if I'm kidding myself.

We are decluttering our house to move. I have a boxful (this size www.rapidracking.com/en/rra/heavy-duty-trunk-on-wheels-190-l-strata-a572563?srsltid=AfmBOopfzISGxf9rcdHpM486xANqwkqjuSvDBaKR-7a9JZ0n3WOJwrz0Eks) of clothes from pre-children which do not fit me, and also that I wouldn't wear right now anyway as there's business wear and I'm currently a SAHM. Family, friends and OH are all suggesting I get rid of them as they've been up there for 5 years and I should let it go.

But...my body now is a result of 2 pregnancies, a pandemic (oh yes the COVID pounds are still there!), a stint of depression after a bereavement and having next to no energy as our youngest has only started semi-reliably sleeping through the night a few weeks ago. I've been a zombie. Since she's been sleeping better my motivation for exercise and eating healthily is already coming back. I've started doing a little workout in the mornings, I've joined a weekly exercise class, started intermittent fasting. I feel so much better. Also we've said that next year when the little one goes to school that I'll go back to the office, so in my mind I'll be buying a whole new wardrobe next year either way...either because we got rid of it all and now I need new stuff, or because it still doesn't fit and I'll need clothes for work.

I've gone through and culled anything which is just not my style anymore, or anything where I really don't think I'd wear it again or fit into it. The box is what's left. It's all either one or two sizes smaller than I currently am. Which according to my DR is obese.

AIBU to keep the clothes? Also, in case it's helpful...I bloody hate shopping!

YABU - it's unlikely you'll get back to the same size, even if you do your body will have changed shape and fashions will have changed so just let it go

YANBU - keep the faith! 5 years isn't such a long time when you consider all the things that have been packed into it. If you keep at it with the diet and exercise you'll be so proud of yourself when things fit you again!

I’ve just lost 3 stone and am glad I didn’t chuck out the clothes I’d kept to slim into, as it would be costing me a fortune now.

Vinted has been great when I realised I wanted to stop squeezing into clothes and just embrace the stage I'm in at the moment.

If you did keep them, would you be comfortable still wearing them if photographs were taken and someone were to say to you something like 'oh that's the dress you wore to my sons 21st birthday 8 years ago?' If not, then get rid of them.

Keep your favourites and ones that remind you of times gone bye ditched the rest. I have dresses that no longer fit and haven't fit for a long time a few skirts but the rest goes when i stop feeling good wearing it.

My first thought at the idea of that was pride. It fits, I kept it in good condition, have saved money and stuff from landfill, heck yeah it's the same dress!!

Mum still has things from the 70's, they keep coming back into style and somehow she keeps absolutely rocking them! Though she never really changed weight despite having more children and bereavements than me.

I've kept some things and got rid of others. Now nearly 3 stone down from my highest weight and missing the things I gave away! But I don't really do things that are either in or out if fashion so the age of my wardrobe is irrelevant to me really.

I've literally JUST thrown away my small clothes. I've been kidding myself for 5 years that I'd slim back into them. Ironically, I have just started exercising seriously over the past few months, but even so, my old clothes were very small, like 3 sizes too small.

I came to the conclusion that if and when I get down to that size again, I'll buy new clothes as a reward for getting there.

Why on earth would someone not be comfortable with that?

This was exactly what I found - I left the office to go on holiday in March 2020 and didn't step back through the door until Spring 2023 (lockdown, WFH and then maternity leave). When I came back, office dressing had completely changed - our office was previously business formal, so lots of LK Bennett and Hobbs shift dresses with sheer tights and heels every day. Now smart jeans and trainers are standard fare and I'd look like a out-of-date throwback if I rocked up in a suit and stilettos. 95% of the office wear which I packed up in Summer 2020 has gone on Vinted.

I've got an entire chest of drawers JUST full of jeans that don't fit me.

You've inspired me to get rid, what is the point of 20 pairs of jeans that don't fit me? I can replace a singular pair easily enough, and I think with work wear, unless you wear expensive Hugo Boss suits or something, I'd rather something a bit more au courant than 6 or 7 years out of date!

i have still got clothes that i could wear to a funeral or an interview. Smart classic clothes. I assume they fit me but may look a bit dated.

but plain black trousers say that are a bit too tight - give them away as i could get more of those easily and now prefer looser trousers anyway for work (if i HAD to be smart, i mostly wear jeans for work)

A have a bin- bag of ‘next size down’ clothes in the loft. It was more, but I culled it to, jeans trousers and some favourite tops. Tatty, old, dated, stuff all got chucked (charity shopped). I see no problem in keeping it.

Only keep a garment if it meets ALL these criteria. Consider each item separately.

1. You have space to store that is completely dry, mildew and moth free, and you don't need that space for something more important.
2. The item is something you loved wearing - it suits your style and personality, and is in a colour that suits you.
3. It is in very good condition, almost good-as-new.
4. It is totally classic so won't age. Consider collars, cuffs, shoulders, sleeves, lengths, widths, etc.
5. It would be difficult or expensive to replace. e.g. Don't keep jeans, even 'branded' ones. Don't keep tee-shirts and hoodies. Do keep a classic shirt-blouse in a quality natural material (not like the paper-thin, loose-weave, or synthetic crap that fills the shops now)

It you answered 'no' to any of the above, out it goes.

This is helpful, thank you!

I keep them. Like you I’m probably half a size or so bigger than I was a decade ago but many is the time that I’ve pulled out something I haven’t worn for five year and worn it with great delight. Sometimes until it then falls apart.

Do you have a daughter? If so, I'd suggest keeping a few of the more expensive/classic clothes (though probably not the office wear) in the hope that she would wear some of it one day. My 17 year old daughter has worn quite a few items of mine - and it's really nice to see.
If not, I'd take the items to the charity shop.

I have this issue. What I’d do (and will do) is get rid of anything replaceable and only keep what I truly love that can’t be replaced

Give them away.

Keeping a rail of clothes that you can’t (and most likely, won’t ever) fit into is like keeping a huge billboard advertising your “failure” to yourself in your home. And I use the word failure ironically, as you are so much more than your body size, as your loved ones clearly recognise.

Let them go to someone who can enjoy them NOW, and buy yourself something that you can enjoy NOW. And then do it; enjoy yourself. Because the you of now if the only real one. Not the past nine stone you, or the imaginary future “thin” you.

Now. That’s all any of us have. So drop those clothes at Oxfam and start living in this moment, fully, and with joy and pride in the life you’ve built.

About 3 years ago I changed my diet to address high blood pressure. It worked a treat and as a happy consequence I also dropped 3 dress sizes going from a 14/16 to an 8/10.

It was amazing how much my attitude to clothes shopping changed when I could buy clothes that I loved than just buying things because they concealed my fat!

if I were you I'd get rid. Wearing clothes from 6/7 years ago that don't quite fit you will not boost your mood. Sell on Vinted while they are still recent enough to find buyers. Save the money and then when the time comes and your weight has settled book a shop with a John Lewis (or other) personal stylist.

I'm the last person to ask about hoarding clothes in a size I no longer am, or for a lifestyle I no longer have (or maybe never had but....). But as you are active decluttering then in your shoes I'd get rid.

I'd go through them and say if I magically woke up that size tomorrow, would I be excited to wear them or would I feel I should? Only keep the things you'd be excited about.

This is good advice.

Getting rid of everything is probably better, though I struggle to let go of 'good clothes' that almost-not-quite fit. However, I am surprised that so many people think that clothes from five years ago will be noticeably out of style. If you tend to follow the most extreme fashion fads, maybe you're more likely to have clothes that are visibly off-trend, but I don't think it's usually as bad as that. Of course, I wouldn't be able to say what's 'current' at any given moment, anyway, but I don't think the average item of clothing looks decidedly outdated in a mere five years.

I'm not very stylish. Tend to wear what I like/suits rather than follow trends. Or more recently my wardrobe is decidedly practical. I used to live in skirts and dresses or wrap tops, but as I'm always sat on the floor or carrying children these days I'm more a jeans and t shirt person. Am not wishing this season away, but I will enjoy being able to wear what I like without thinking of how revealing it might accidentally be when hoisting children around/spending my day with people who delight in practicing undoing buttons!!

Anything you bought more than five years ago will be much better quality than things you can buy now. Better fabric, better fibres, better made…