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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Double trouble

4 replies

Henrysmycat · 28/08/2024 04:55

This is not an AIBU but I’m having a double mastectomy this morning after fighting aggressive cancer for nearly a year.
I can’t sleep. I need a handhold and stories of people that overcome the situation. Regarding cancer, I’m not in the clear yet, yet I’m crying over my boobs more than my life. Why am I so weird?

OP posts:
CatsandtheBear · 28/08/2024 05:07

It's not weird at all.
You are allowed to grieve a part of you that is being taken away.

Our breasts are a huge part of our identity, the way we carry ourselves, wear clothes, experience intimacy etc

All of that is changing for you and that is going to be a huge adjustment and a process to come to terms with.

I know a gorgeous lady who had a double a few years ago and she really struggled with the idea, but is now thriving!
She even chose not to go for reconstruction after being convinced that she would.

She is cancer free now and just welcomed her first grandbaby.

You are allowed to be angry and rage at the world. So many people say you have to stay positive, but anger is a strong motivator and denying your emotions is (in my opinion) incredibly toxic.

You don't become superhuman just because you have cancer and the cancer doesn't take away your ability to have all sorts of emotions on many different levels.

I am sending you warm, healing vibes and my thoughts will be with you today.

You've got this!!!
And one day, you'll be out the other side and all of this will be over.

One day at a time, one hour at a time.
Conquer each part as it comes and don't forget to nourish yourself as a human and as a woman.

ranoutofquinoaandprosecco · 28/08/2024 07:17

Totally understandable, I had a smx 6 years ago and was the best thing I did, got the buggering cancery blob out of my life.
Take it really easy on yourself. Take each step at a time. Get your troops rallied ready to help when you're ready for it.
Flowers

Mercurial123 · 28/08/2024 07:22

Good luck. It's hugely stressful. Initially, I had a lumpectomy, but after discovering, I had a gene mutation Chek2. I went ahead with a double preventative mastectomy. I didn't have reconstruction. 15 years on, I'm still cancer free.

Ella31 · 28/08/2024 18:32

I can't advise as I've no first hand experience but i just wanted to wish you all the luck in the world and a hand hold. I hope you are recovering well by now. You'll be ok. And it's ok to be angry and scared and sad. This is huge but you've been so strong already fighting this crappy disease, it's ok to feel scared.

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