To think this is the reason hw ain't seeing the kids and to be concerned ?

[inthedarkx]

So small back ground

Ex was abusive to me in one marriage. He cheated and left for his now wife

She's grown up as a jehova witness but my ex never has been and he always called it a cult and stayed well clear from that sort of thing

Anyway we have had a lot of co parenting issues with him turning up late dropping kids off early and I was expected to be at home

So he stopped seeing the children as I wouldn't agree and sign an email to follow his list of rules
The two main rules was I had I had to stop going on parenting websites on Facebook asking for co parenting advice and was told I was bit allowed to talk about DV or share posts on the dv I suffered by him
The second rule was I wasn't allowed to 'stop contact' if he was late I had to wait at home for him to arrive whatever time he could. I told him where to go so he's stopped seeing the kids and told the kids it's my fault.

Anyway he asked our 17 amd 18 year olds to go for lunch with him today ( 17 year old refused as he's hurt her deeply and the 18 year went as she does absolutely anything he asks)

Anyway all he did was talk to her about her becoming a jehova witness as he's currently studying to become one ( like his wife) and he told her all the rules that she cant have a boyfriend until marriage ( she currently has one so she'd have to ditch him!) He's asked her to go to a church and spend some time with the jehova witnesses and she's actually considering it ??

I'm worried coz she's only doing this to please him..she's heavily controlled by him.. I've heard some bad things about this 'cult' and that she would have to 'shun me' being a sinner and not part of their congregation

Do you think this is why he doesn't see our other children? Due to the fact he's becoming one ? As my kids are not part of his jehova witness household?

Im concerned for my daughter as I was in a abusive marriage with her father and joining this religion is essentially putting her at that same risk as they say you can't leave an abusive marriage or the place shuns you.

He said he will see the kids when they are 18 probably at which point he will brainwash the kids to join and shun me and I'll never see them again

She’s 18, and is curious about the religion which is clearly important to her dad and step mum. Encourage her to think about why a religion might want its members to cut contact with and shun people who don’t believe the same as they do, and to assess what she’s told critically; but I wouldn’t catastrophise quite yet, she’s not even been to church with them yet.

I’d suspect ex not being interested in the younger children is more about younger children requiring more effort to parent and often being quite tedious than anything to do with being a JW.

I'd be concerned OP but I think the pp's advise to just talk to her about it is good. Don't flip out.

FWIW, all of the JWs I've met were very nice people, and didn't shun anyone.

She would need to learn about the bible and it may be for her and it may not but you do not shun non believers. I would keep communication open and see how it goes. They have a hall and not a church and non believers often visit. They may be starting a study, done a study but not sure, curious about what goes on or sometimes lonely or been dipping in and out for years.

Questioning is important. If he was becoming a JW he would really need to step up as a father father so I suggest he is choosing an easy option and not God's way if he was genuine in his heart.

I'd tell my daughter she can see him but there's no pressure to follow his religion or join in. Sounds like he's trying to manipulate her to join and she's falling for it because she's getting the attention from dad.