Motivating kids to practice maths and writing

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DC is going into yr3 next week. Last year we had a terrible time getting him to practice his school work. He gets upset that he's not as good as his friends who are intrinsically very motivated but refuses to practise any of it at home. Teachers have complained that he doesnt put much effort into his work though he's bright. Was a struggle to get him to practise his reading but now he's got it and totally loves it now. Bribery doesn't work with him. We've done threats but that gets really depressing after a while. Any tips before the start of the new year?

I teach in a primary school.
Children are in school for more than 6 hours a day, and they are writing and doing maths every day. I'm not convinced that forcing 7 year olds to do more school work outside school hours is beneficial.
What you could do is play games that increase manual dexterity ( eg using small fiddly things, or colouring or making very detailed patterns).
You could also involve him with practical maths, dividing up pizzas and packets of biscuits fairly and equally, weighing ingredients, doubling or halving ingredients, and getting him to think about day to day maths problems as they crop up in normal life. Use mathematical vocabulary so that he becomes very familiar with the language ( eg ' multiply' as well as 'times' and ' groups of'.
Make sure he knows his tables; you can practice these on the way to school, see if he can beat you or a sibling to get the answer first.

It shouldn't be 'practising' maths and reading.

Get him reading because he wants to. Find the thing he likes and encourage it....for mine there were football magazines, the beano, trips to the library, eye spy books on journeys and trips.

For maths get games that encourage maths - pontoon/blackjack (21) was a favourite of my youngest- there had to be something to bet - pennies, jelly beans etc Monopoly...working out rents etc (can you tell money is a strong motivator for my kids!)

Does he like cooking? Can he pick and choose and follow a recipe? Maths and reading together.

Go to a museum and get him to read some signs. Or a nature reserve and follow a trail. Find things that he would like. Then gently encourage.

Don't make it 'homework'. That is too much like school.

I think the advice from the teacher upthread is spot on. Make it fun by involving your child in real, practical, day to day living. Nothing worse than forcing them to do boring repetitive "school work" style of tasks at home. Guaranteed to turn them off. The skill is to improve their skills without them thinking it's "boring school work". And as she says, not just basic reading and Maths, but logic, thinking, etc. I remember taking our son down our street to the main road when he was a very young age (probably 2 or 3) and getting him to make tally charts of different makes of car, different colours of car, etc. Playing "I spy" whilst driving in the car. Pointing out different kinds of trees/plants/leaves in the garden and on country walks, etc. Getting him to help with cooking/baking by reading recipes (a kind of comprehension), measuring ingredients, etc. Even getting him to help clean the house to improve manual dexterity with opening containers, dusting, using cotton buds to clean grooves and corners, etc. And yes, splitting things like Pizzas into numbers of servings, planning buffet foods, i.e. tell him there's 10 people, and each will want two small sausage rolls, one half of pork pie, 3 small tomatoes, etc. to get him to tally up the totals of each, then create a shopping list, etc. All age dependent of course, but we did things like that right from the moment he could walk and talk right through the primary years. And yes, to learning spelling and reciting times tables on the school run and other car journeys in between playing i-spy and tally counting cars, animals or whatever else. Make it fun and relevant and they learn very quickly. By the time he started learning foreign languages, we'd moved on to him learning foreign numbers, basic vocab etc on the school run.

Thank you for some of the tips. Any ideas for how to i.ptovw dexterity? Ds refuses to draw or do any coloring. He would touch a pen or pencil the whole summer if I didn't ask him to.

What maths games? He refuses to do his time tables on the way to stuff...he just say 'oh mum, not maths'. However, how does he learn his times table without practice or subtraction without practice.

First off

I'd get his eye site, hearing and dyslexia checked to start with

It's amazing how many DC go years with one of these as an issue and once diagnosed you go oh yes that makes sense

My son is the same OP, he just wants to play or watch television. Anything that is pitched as homework gets an instant barrage of whining and complaints. I really wish he was more motivated, he just rushes through everything and makes silly mistakes because he’s trying to get it done so quickly.

For writing practice I get him to do things that are more fun for him - making menus for an imaginary restaurant or for dinner that night, signs for around the house, writing stories, cards for friends & family, that sort of thing.

His school sets a lot of homework so we have a rule that there’s no TV until it’s done properly without rushing, double checked, and done without a fuss. Loads of praise when he does it.

Can he "help" with housework, DIY, washing the car, etc? Basically anything using your hands will help. Especially "fun" things, like helping put up a shelf, using the screwdriver, using a spirit level, things he's not done before but which make him feel "grown up". Or gardening, i.e. removing weeds with a trowel, cutting off dead flower heads, etc. Even asking him to open windows or unlock/lock the front door, etc. Basically regularly "challenge" him with doing things he's not done before, however simple or basic.

Can you buy him "creative" things, like those scrape off foil pictures, or get him playing with Lego or making models, electronic or chemistry kits. There must be something he'd be interested in doing from a practical perspective.

Does he have a father, grandfather, uncle who is good with DIY or has a home workshop so he could practice woodwork etc?

For times tables you could try finding times table songs, or use Hit The Button and Times Tables Rockstars games on a tablet or computer. Or again use real life examples, eg if everyone at the birthday party needs two sandwiches and there are 10 kids how many sandwiches do we need etc

We only discovered DS terrible eyesight in year 7 and than because of getting his eyes tested we realised he had very mild dyslexia

it was his teacher who suggested he get his eyes tested

It didn't hold him back academically because he just got A stars for A levels

His school at first didn't believe he could possibly have dyslexia because he was in the top 1% and it had never been picked up because he could still read and write well but we realised when reading out loud he read out the words letter by letter as opposed to just readi g the word as a whole like normal

Anyway the did test him the next after i brought it uo

@NoNameNoPlace

His school sets a lot of homework so we have a rule that there’s no TV until it’s done properly without rushing, double checked, and done without a fuss. Loads of praise when he does it.

We likewise established discipline and rules as soon as he got his first homework. His "play" time was between getting home from school and our evening meal at roughly 5.30/6.00 at the dining table. As soon as we finished eating, it was homework time, on the dining table. When he'd done it (we'd check it was finished and to standard), it'd be short play time again, then bath and bed where it was book reading time. It was a fixed, non negotiable, pattern right from the first day he got homework.

As the years passed, the pattern was tweaked according to his age. But it was something we stuck too right up to GCSE years, i.e. the homework on the dining table after the meal, not necessarily the bath and bed of course! Some days, he'd finish his homework in good time and have plenty of evening left for playing etc. Other times, if he had a lot, there'd be little time for anything afterwards other than shower and bed (but then he'd play computer games in bed!). But the structure was there throughout, probably for 10 years ago so from latter years in primary right through secondary. It just became his habit to do his homework after tea, even when he was 16! No fuss, no arguments, just the habit/expectation, almost muscle memory.

DS loved a tv show called Numberjacks and there were online maths things called Alphablocks he loved to at that age and Alphablocks for words

This was just before iPads were a thing so there's probably lots a great maths apps they can get involved with

He off to study a maths degree so he was very into maths

When DS was young he was just like your DS. My childminder told me he had delay with fine motor skills. He wouldn't / couldn't write and wouldn't do maths.

So we used an analogue clock to get used to allowing a 15 min break/ 5 min break. Dinner at 6pm and so on.
We prepared food together. So plenty of weighing and counting out grapes, raisins,
Chocolate buttons etc. Moving on to dishing up as in spoonfuls of bolog getting them to weigh the same.
Lots of screwing and unscrewing things like ikea furniture. Just a small playroom table.
Writing we practised in different surfaces. We wrote with marker pens on the patio windows. We traced letters in the flour when baking. Cut out sandpaper letter shapes. Best of all was writing secret notes in lemon juice.
We always had a white board on the fridge. It was his job to write things on the shopping list. Maybe chocolate biscuits made it on there if I could read it.
As he got older regarding reading there was a lot of cookery book instructions. Seed packets for growing lettuce and cress, chillis and tomatoes. He did love stories and being read to. Sometimes I would be tired and he would read to me.
Read everything. Street signs. The times on the post box. Adverts. Anything.
Good luck it's not easy.
The best ever was when he was diagnosed with convergence at year 10. Glasses made all the difference. Not detected at a normal site test sadly. The optometrist suggested a Lamy fountain pen and it made a world of difference. Best shape to hold and they write more slowly with a fountain pen.
None of this held him back. He has a good degree from a good university.

Has anyone tried to get a tutor for their DC? DS is so reluctant to practice with us that am thinking whether that could be an option.

Hello,
I do occasional tutoring for primary school students, and have done for the past 5 years. And honestly, unless they've got a lot of internal motivation to improve (which it doesn't sound like your son has), then it would probably be a bit of a waste of money.
All the advice you've got further up the thread is excellent.

@zingally Interesting to hear - why do you think that it would be a waste of time? Ds hates practising with us but is fine with a teacher.

In my experience, a teacher at school is very different to a tutor coming to your home, and into the child's space where all their other distractions are.