Or is my DH being unreasonable with video games?

[Ginghamthrow]

Every evening once we’ve put our DS to bed he goes straight onto his video game on his laptop and I can’t even speak to him while he plays it. He gets into a really bizarre state of anxiety.
He plays against real people so he can’t pause it or anything.
If I so much as disturb him, he has a meltdown.
Is this normal behaviour for a 43 year old? AIBU?

Of course YANBU. Do you think he is addicted? I could t be with someone like this.

No. It's not normal.

No it’s not healthy behaviour. If he can’t handle those types of PvP games in a mature, grown adult husband and father kind of way, then he shouldn’t be playing them. There are plenty of other video game genres that are not PvP.

In addition to this, he should have a time limit per evening of how long he can play.

He could very well have a video game addiction.

I think he could be addicted.
When there was no WiFi on our holiday he wasn’t able to play it in the evening and his whole persona was different. So it definitely seems to impact his personality. I have tried to talk to him about it but he thinks I’m the one being unreasonable.

Check out the symptoms section, if it rings true have him read it as well. It may get through to him.

my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/23124-video-game-addiction#symptoms-and-causes

I say this as someone who plays videogames myself, has a husband who plays them, and I think that generally they are hilariously vilified on here when there are way more vapid and pointless ways to spend your time that are far more socially accepted - he sounds like he has a problem and this isn't normal, healthy or acceptable at all.

If it's altering her personality and creating actual anxiety then it's treading heavily in addiction territory.

It's not good. My friends husband was like this until their first baby arrived. His cure was drastic, he sold his Xbox and every game going cold turkey.

He knew it wasn't okay deep down.

As a result he went from a boring job to starting his own business alongside the boring job. That replaced the gaming.

YANBU.

DH is a gamer and games most nights while we watch TV, I've no issue with it. But that's not what you're describing.

It depends what you mean when you say 'he has a meltdown', but it doesn't sound particularly healthy.

He is completely unreasonable. I'd consider smashing the thing

I video game but play a co operative game. I assume your DH is playing PVP against other players. Meltdowns are not normal though being annoyed can be. What game is it?

He's 43 not 3?

Who the fuck throws a tantrum over a video game?

He should be spending his evenings chilling with you.

I've never understood how a grown adult with kids,a household to care for,a relationship and a full time job can find so much time to game.

No, he's a grown man!
Would be a deal breaker for me.