Inheritance - what to do with mine?

[BotDranning]

So - Im posting very deliberately here - but please be gentle.

These are 2 am thinkings......

I am about to change my will as buying with DP.

We will own our new home 50:50.

I have 2 DS - Both of whom are doing ok.

DS1 Is just completing a Degree Apprenticeship London - minimum minimum wage. He will get a 1st in a BA. He has worked so exceptionally hard and has been offered a full time position with the company that has paid for his apprenticeship. It feels that he is probably set up for life - has a lot of opportunities to use his degree world wide (same industry as me so I'm confident in his opportunity). He will have no student debt. I currently give him £200 a month and will continue to do so for next few years.

DS2 is about to go to university - STEM, but can not get an apprenticeship in the area he wants to work. Has worked exceptionally hard to get to this stage (not through the formal routes) and I fully support his choices. He will have a full student loan - but minimal support loan - I will be giving him £300 a month once he starts uni in September.

So my question. when I die my estate will go to the boys. This includes 50% of a substantial house and my life insurance and pension. Currently this equates to around 700k. (350k in property and the rest in pension and life insurance).

So my question and it only occurred to me last night very late whilst I couldn't sleep..... would it be fair or reasonable to write into my will that everything is shared financially 50:50 once my youngest student loan has been paid off?

I can't decide if this is fair or not.

YABU = 50:50 split no consideration of student loan
YANBU = give the advantage of paying off the loan.

@LoneHydrangea that's not true. They figure with the lower income start and longer to pay it back (40 years) over 60% of students taking a loan will pay it back (plus accrued interest).
OP 50:50. One might marry well, one might become unable to work, one might decide to chuck in their job and sail around the world... 50:50 or a the only way to go.

I agree with you and I'd tell them I was doing this. First out comes the student loan money and then it's split between them.

One thing you could do is take out life assurance for the price of the student loan, so that you could then split the rest between them. The other thing you could do is now that your older son has finished his apprenticeship, give his £200 to your younger son so that he doesn't have to borrow as much, so the final student loan repayment would be lower.

However, I'd be discussing it with them both before taking any action.

Will DS 2 be living away for University? If he is will his Dad give him £300 a month too so £600 in total?

Regarding student loans it is best to help him pay it off before the interest builds and builds if that is your intention.

no keep it 50:50. The student loan debt will most likely increase with interest so could end be being quite a significant amount that comes out of your estate before the remainder is split.

i also really don’t get the worry and obsession with student loan debt that people have with it.
it comes out of earnings based on income. It doesn’t affect anything really, doesn’t count as debt in the sense that a significant bank loan does. So while yes, take home pay is reduced, it’s not really that much and doesn’t stop a person taking out more traditional loans like a mortgage.

But fairly isn't necessarily the same as equally. You're already trying to equalise by wiping out DS2 student debt. What if he turns out not to have the same earning potential as his brother? Or DS1 marries a very wealthy wife and inherits a house from her family? You can't keep trying to maintain a balance and your plans allow a generous inheritance for both. Treat them both the same.

While "treat them the same" sounds noble, this approach is taking any agency away from the person writing the will.

Noone is entitled to 1/xth of the estate, no matter what.

I don’t think either is right or wrong. While I know it can be a very sensitive subject, if you are able to, talk to your children about it.

I am the more financially fortunate of 2 siblings. However, my parents have helped my sibling out a lot more along the way and are worried that 50:50 (of a substantial estate) would be unfair to me.

The way I see it, I’ve had a lot of luck (academic ability, meeting DH etc.) and I don’t need the money. It would make a huge difference to my sibling though. I suggested they leave more to him. Sibling isn’t great with money though, so that is a factor.

My DM has decided to leave it up to me how it is divided, beyond equal and specific amounts for grandchildren. Do not do this!! I’m trying to get them to be specific in favour of sibling, but in the meantime we talk regularly about it so my brother knows I’m not out to screw him over! To be honest, it goes completely over his head as he is so laid back, but it does worry me.

I’m hoping my parents spend the lot on a lavish retirement, but if not, sibling will get more than me if things stay as they are.