Charge more for children who don’t go to bed?

[Alwaysforgetthecrackers]

I do babysitting/childcare over the summer in a busy, tourist area.
The majority of the time I’ve always had 1-2 children and when I arrive, they’re in bed sleeping and stay asleep for the evening, parents give me the remote, kindly say I can help myself to food and all is great.
I recently sat for someone who had three very active boys, they were still up when I arrived, wanted constant snacks mum asked me to make and tidy things away. They all had different bedtimes, mum wanted me to play games with them, put them to bed etc, little one fought with me on this and eldests bedtime was literally just before they returned home, so I spent the rest of the evening getting him snacks, tidying after him, playing games.
I’m ok doing this…it did make me wonder though, should this be the same charges as basically sitting with the child already in bed?
Also, nice as this mum was, she initially queried the price being a bit expensive, whereas all
others have been very appreciative

i certainly wouldn't be looking after 3 kids for £15 an hour asleep or awake.
i'd say £15 for 1 and £5 for each child after that
and i wouldn't be doing any cleaning either i'm the baby sitter not an au pair

I pay £15/hr to my babysitter on the understanding that she plays with my son for a bit then does his bedtime. Her full time job is with a nursery so she’s experienced in childcare, has paediatric first aid qualifications etc.

If I had a child who was already in bed when the babysitter came and they were just sitting watching tv then I wouldn’t pay as much and would probably just offer it to friends’ teenagers rather than get someone qualified.

Same charge.

I used to babysit for multiple families as a teenager and I don't think the children were ever in bed! Ages from 3-9. I'd take it as a huge bonus if they were!

My kids rarely went to bed before 8pm even as toddlers. If I'd wanted to be sure they'd be asleep for a babysitter I'd never have gone out before 9pm which is so late it's pointless.

I’m not UK but our babysitters typically charge £25/hour one one kid and usually goes up by 3-5£ per kid if they are siblings. However, definitely no expectation that they’re in bed already and I would absolutely expect DD to be entertained etc within reason. When I babysat, sometimes the kids were in bed, sometimes not. I for sure would not charge more if they wouldn’t. But if it was a tough job, I’d probably just not sit again for them but I had plenty of families so could be a bit picky 🤷‍♀️

What do you mean?

They didnt actually check in on the baby / child all evening?

When I babysit as a teenager I used to play with the kids, do bedtime, then tidy up toys downstairs. That's 30 years ago and was always the expectation of babysitting. One time I was looking after a tiny baby and a toddler and had to put them both to bed.

Babysitting is looking after children while parents are out. It isn't sitting on a sofa watching TV. Although if they are in bed then it can be. But that's not the default.

You're a babysitter, not a nanny. Start charging extra for nanny services. Definitely offer £15 as your 'children are in bed' babysitting rate and more for 'putting them to bed' nanny rate.

Babysitting paid £25 an evening as a 15 year old in in 2000 - that included half an hour of tv and straight to bed. None of the nonsense and bad parenting you had to deal with!

This. I would expect baby sitting to include child care, which also involves a little bit of cleaning up after them, not think of them as two different things.

My teenage kids all babysit for a couple of neighbours, both families have babies who are always fast asleep for the duration and we make sure one of us is at home so can be at hand if anything happens. One of my DDs even said she only wants to babysit sleeping children (privately to us)! They get £10 an hour and have only met the babies concerned awake because I insisted they do so during the daytime.

When my kids were small enough to need a babysitter but could be still awake, I used ask someone from a local nursery to do it and paid £15 an hour because the necessary level of trust was higher as they might need to interact with my dcs etc. I would never ever expect them to do any tidying.

One of my DDs is learning to iron and is going to offer that as an additional service while babysitting, hoping to bump the fee up to £12/hour.

I'm surprised you assume that there should be a one-size-fits-all cost for a service provided by a human being, rather than a baby monitor.

I'd be embarrassed to begrudge the human being who has full responsibility for my children during unsociable hours an additional couple of quid if I'm clearly comfortable enough to be on holiday.

In my experience it's middle-class women who are the worst for begrudging women in roles which are typically working class ones. Working-class women are happy to pay a fair price and don't feel obliged to wring every possible drop of value from other human beings.

I expect most of those who are outraged are the ones whose children are not in bed when they leave, and never have been.

I think it's fair enough to have a range of prices and charge more for more demanding jobs (based on the ages of the children or their bedtimes), though it may make some parents reluctant to hire you, and until you're familiar with the family, you'll be basing your prices on what the parent says. (Some children will always be more reluctant to go to bed than others.

It would also be fair to say you only sit for a minimum length of time, to make it worth it and to prevent someone coming back 'too early' when you could have taken a different job and earned more for the night. Again, this may put some potential customers off, but you can adjust your terms, if demand is too low.

Our expectations are obviously different. If I wanted someone to entertain/ feed/ do bedtime routine I wouldn’t expect a babysitter to do that. I also babysat as a teenager and was never expected to do anything beyond watching tv whilst the kids slept.

"It’s not perfectly fair but, if you are a teacher, would you charge a premium for teaching a large tricky Year 7 class over an easy Year 12 or 13?"

Probably the other way round. Standard rates for tuition (or teaching, when I worked in FE) are higher for A level than for GCSE, and less than either for younger children.

But it would be easier to find a teacher (especially a supply teacher) for a school where the students are well-behaved rather than for one consisting mostly of "large tricky" classes, whatever their age.

In the OP's situation, she's more likely not to accept a booking with this family again.

£15 quid an hour to sit on your arse? I'm off to stick a card in the newsagents.

You're very grabby to not want to earn your money by playing with the kids.

I think you are well within your right to charge this particular Mum more if she asks you again.

Do it, definitely! I'm sure it's much better paid than what you do now. Don't forget to move to a tourist area first, where you will only find work for 4 months of the year.

OP, as you're a professional with such good experience I think you need to be more specific/professional about terms and conditions.
If you're advertising your credentials, you shouldn't be surprised if people take you up on them, but do charge accordingly.
eg

1. The full time booked needs to be paid for even if parents come home early.
2. Rate for babes in arms is £15/hour, over-5s is £18 an hour
3. Additional children are £5 an hour
4. The fee is for babysitting only, no housework
5. All drink/food the child might require needs to be left ready for them
6. Expectations to be discussed beforehand

That said, if you aren't paying tax on this income don't forget that the person paying might have to earn twice that - eg, to pay you £45 they might have to earn c.£90

£15 an hour is a perfectly good wage for a babysitter, even more so if cash in hand which I suspect this is. You win some and you lose some when babysitting.

If you don't want to work for your money then just don't babysit for them again.

Clues in the name ‘baby sitting’, not ‘baby sleeping’.

It's so weird that the roles that middle-class people believe should barely scrape living wage are those traditionally undertaken by women, and particularly by working-class women, often around their own caring responsibilities.

Babysitters.
Social care.
Nursery workers.
Cleaners.

Such. a. weird. co-incidence.

Hi OP, not sure if you're still reading but here's my thoughts, FWIW:

we have 2 kids, good sleepers. When we go out I use a very cheap (£10/hr) local 16yo girl to babysit for us, and make sure they're asleep for her before I leave (have stayed with them and been late for my night out once or twice when they've been fighting sleep...)

I leave my phone number with her and expect her to call me if they wake up so I can come home and help her.

What that mum asked of you - to spend a busy evening entertaining, feeding, bathing and getting to sleep 3 boisterous boys - was a big ask, but YAB the U one for not getting clear on her situation and expectations before you took the job.

I am clear with our babysitter what the rules are and pay her accordingly. If you have 30 years experience, why have you not worked this out by now?

You deserve clarity before you agree to the job, but it's on you to make sure you're clear, as the experienced sitter.

How are people entitled for pointing out she is literally complaining about being paid the price she decided and being paid for the hours she works?!

£15 isn’t an awful lot for what what expected of you. I wouldn’t do it for that.