I’ll start off by saying that both children are ASD and are very alike dad so there is suspected ASD there but he refuses to have an assessment.
Teenage children and we have bumbled along for years with me basically doing everything that requires any emotional input and I’m starting to unravel and not cope with it all.
Im waiting for an ADHD assessment so it’s really hard for me to know if my emotions are in line with others especially as every time I get upset about anything at all, DH will either completely ignore it or say “ I don’t know why you’re crying “ or “ You get upset over the stupidest things “
We have been away last week and he’s got to do a lot of the stuff he loves doing as well as a few family type activities but due to the kids being completely different personalities we tend to have to split a lot anyway.
All meals are separate as one is vegetarian and won’t eat in restaurants for instance so not a whole lot of time spent altogether.
Last night, we were back and unpacked and I sat on the sofa and asked him when he was visiting his mum as it’s her birthday this weekend and was met with a “ I’ve just had a 3 hour drive with DS ( which was actually 4 hours prior and he had spent the rest of the time fiddling with his ebike ) I am not talking anymore “
I started getting upset and said that I was only asking a question about his mum - I’ve got the presents already wrapped for her despite not being close to her but because I knew he wouldn’t do it and then would pick up a lousy bunch of flowers on the way there like every year and he said “ We’ve just spent 5 whole days together what more do you want? “
I couldn’t help crying and then was met by the usual response of “ You’re always upset about something “ and “ I’m tired, it’s not a crime “
The children then heard some of this and one of them defended him saying that he’s always been like this so why am I making it into a problem and the other said we should separate as it just doesn’t work.
I don’t know what to do anymore