to make my boyfriend responsible for me taking the pill?

[Nymphadora]

my friend thinks I am. Bf and I are both fine with it. I don't tend to remember and don't want to take it really (I want kids like NOW and bf wants to wait) when we used condoms it was his responsibility (same issue really) and that apparantly was ok so I don't get the problem now.

put a reminder on your phone?

put it near your toothbrush/kettle/something you go to every morning?

I don't think you can make him responsible; that means it's his fault if you get pregnant because you didn't take a pill but it's your mouth and your prescription...

Well, it could be seen as having joint responsibility for contraception! - He fetches it, you take it. Don't think there's anything wrong with it, tbh. My dh has to bring me my meds every night, because I'm SO crap at remembering! (they're not contraceptives)

I think the fact you pointed out you want kids now and giving him responsibility for the pill makes me think if you get what you want you can tell him it's his fault and not take the blame as his not ready seriously think about it

Why not have the injection/implant/Mirena if you think you won't 'remember' to take it?

He is probably not going to remember either, and as lewis says, its your mouth and your pill.

Have to agree with LewisFan on this one. Fair enough him being responsible for condoms, they go on his bits. He shouldn't have to be responsible for something that goes in your mouth, whether you want to have kids right now or not. You should be responsible for it out of pure respect of the fact that he doesn't want children right now.

Can't take long-term hormonal stuff as I am bit dodgy emotional wise with hormones and have mini-pill on 'trial'.

He is actually very good at remembering ! He has been reminding me about other meds for months and he is fine about it. We just didn't get why my friend was up in arms about it.

if you do end up pg now, he will (based on what youve said) assume as we have that it would be deliberate and probably rsent you for it

What are you expecting him to do? Hand it to you each morning and watch you swallow it? To be honest, it sounds like something our nurses do to our patients.

I agree with shewillbeloved, you need to respect the fact that he doesn't want children right now. How would you feel if you fall pregnant and he isn't pleased? I know someone who was in that position and it was an awful situation for both of them. She never forgave him for his reaction and they split up.

And please don't think I underestimate how hard it is for you being with someone who doesn't want children. I've been there - I lived with someone for 12 years who didn't, - but I'd never have got pregnant deliberately. He was entitled to his opinion, just as I was entitled to mine - but I had no right to make him be a parent against his wishes.

He wants kids but not now, I am so broody and am struggling with it. I have managed to take it, but have been late a couple of times so we made the decision that he would prompt me (I take it around the time he comes in so it works quite well)

I don't think you should abdicate all responsibility - by all means he can remind you, but you have to take some of the responsibility yourself.

Although it sounds to me as if it suits you because you wouldn't mind him forgetting as well ... and that's not fair knowing that he doesn't want an unplanned pregnancy.

i understand your broodyness having only recently started TTC myself, but having been waiting since last year, our reasons were different but the feelings the same, i dont theink it unreasonable for him to prompt you, but perhaps it would help you to feel better to discuss when he feels he might be ready? give you something to work to?

im on a waiting to TTC if you wanted somewhere to post? x

If it's just a reminder, it's all good, I was diabolical at remembering my pills and all sorts of folk were known to quiz me on it as they thought it amusing that I was so forgetful.

However, if you want to abdicate all responsibility you are a fool, and a very childish one at that.

to talk to like minded people here is the thread.

i think the point everyone's trying to make is that if you just askin about it as a reminder then yeah fine, but if your posing it as, you dont want kids so your porblem type of thing then you've not really thought it thru, to quote an american chat show "mother's baby, daddy maybe" lol meaning of course would you really wanna risk your relationship and going it alone?