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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For not wanting to go on holiday with my in-laws

30 replies

booblue · 16/04/2008 19:45

During a drunken nite I agreed to go on holiday with my Mother & father in law(mil is like PAULINE FOWLER out of eastenders)& my 2 Sister-in-laws who are in their 40s but both just split from their partners.
Now its booked I am filled with dread as I can`t think of anything worse.Feel bad cos the kids are excited
What can I do to make it stress free other than take mil for a long walk over a cliff.Should i tell dh????

OP posts:
glaskham · 16/04/2008 19:50

Get tons of duty free on the way there!!!!!

I'm off on a holiday with myparents, my sister and the in-laws but luckily we all get on fab!!!

Original poster
booblue · 16/04/2008 19:59

Last time I was there at mil house.She tipped half a bottle of wine down the sink cos she thought fil & I had had enough.
Only had 2 glasses .

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 16/04/2008 20:06

sheesh!what a shameful waste did you consider licking the sink (i would have)

cornsilk · 16/04/2008 20:10

Obviously that wasn't the night you agreed to go on holiday with them!

Original poster
booblue · 16/04/2008 20:12

did think about getting a straw in the sink just to piss her off
I am going to have 2 wks of this
SHIT what have I done ?
Maybe that will teach me for drinking
She thinks I drink alot
I only drink when she comes to stay
O.k I don`t know when to stop cos I end up seeing double of her.NOT nice
What am I going to do??????

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 16/04/2008 20:15

a straw that is classy and resourceful.i'd have just plunged in napper first.

pinkyminky · 16/04/2008 20:15

I hate going away with my own parents, never mind pil! Are they keen babysitters? Perhaps there could be a silver lining.... somewhere?

Original poster
booblue · 16/04/2008 20:18

No they are not keen babysitters what ever she does she makes you feel she is doing you the biggest favour ever OR she volunteers fil to babysit so she can come with us-
PAULINE FOWLER except I am not Sonia

OP posts:
luckylady74 · 16/04/2008 20:21

You have to have an inner mantra that you repeat inside your head 'she's ridiculous and it doesn't matter'.
You have to have an escape route - I sneak about packinga bag and putting the kids shoes on in the bedroom and then when we're on the doorstep shout 'we're off swimming - you have a nice rest' slam of the door!

You have to be able to raise an eyebrow at your dh and know he knows what you mean.

You have to put yourself down to mask your disagreement 'Oh you know I'm over the top about these things' big smile whilst removing the cola from the one year old.

But god it's nice to get home!

Fossil · 16/04/2008 20:28

Actually, I think 2 glasses of wine is your daily limit . Am I missing the point?

Original poster
booblue · 16/04/2008 20:30

Luckylady74
Cheers for the advice I will keep that in mind.I like the escape route one

But how did you know about the cola and sweets before dinner????
She does that and when I say NO she says" its a good job you dont see what else they eat or drink when you are not here" or" in my house I will do as I wish".or "please dont tell them off it upsets me".As the kid is knocking the heads of her flowers in the vase
Wish results in Kid throwing a tantrum cos I have removed the cola from his firm grip or I poison myself from biting my tongue

OP posts:
bran · 16/04/2008 20:43

What sort of holiday are you going on? I'm hoping for your sake it's not a remote villa.

Luckylady's strategy of sneeking going out for the day is a good one. If you're in resort/on a package holiday then you could book onto some day trips and not tell the in-laws until you are about to leave so that they can't come too.

If possible research the area before you go for remote beaches/fun parks/whatever you're interested in. Make sure that you book your own hire car that only you and your dh are named drivers on and that is small enough to only fit you, your dh and the kids. Then you can just hop into the car after breakfast, wave a cheery good-bye and not come home until the kids' bedtime.

bran · 16/04/2008 20:45

I forgot to say don't get drunk if you can help it or you will end up agreeing to do the same thing next year. [stern emoticon] If anyone suggests it then fob them off with "it's a bit early to be planning so far ahead" or something similar.

bearblue · 16/04/2008 20:51

Thanks for the advice guys,

It is a villa but with beach very close.So where ever she chooses to go we go the other.
But then I am not being fair on the kids cos they love their nan.and what about dh .
He will think I am just being awkward

You never know I could break my leg just before or something

TenaciousG · 16/04/2008 23:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
booblue · 17/04/2008 10:40

Could you imagine her DESPAIR
A drunk and a burnt red lobster for a daughter-in-law

She should be gratefull am not Heather Mills

OP posts:
edam · 17/04/2008 10:42

My poor mother STILL has flashbacks to her honeymoon. Which she was forced to take with her MIL, FIL, BIL and BIL's girfriend... and me, aged three months!

Original poster
booblue · 17/04/2008 10:47

Oh my god thats awfull

Ur poor mum

OP posts:
Lowfat · 17/04/2008 10:54

You cannot have Pauluine Fowler for your MIL, because I do!!

It is horrible, I had to do this when I was Pg with DD and it was worst holiday ever. No advice, just lots of sympathy!

Although you could take a few bottles of wine and have some more drunken nights to ease the pain

saltire · 17/04/2008 10:56

CHANGE YOUR MIND.
We went away with MIL and step FIL a few years ago. it was horrendous. We had a cottage near Onich. I only agreed to it because she said "oh we can each go off and do our own thing".
She Lied

CarGirl · 17/04/2008 10:56

What are your sister in laws like? Any chance you 3 can go off and do girlie things and leave dh with the PIL's & children?

bran · 17/04/2008 10:59

Edam that has got to be the worst honeymoon ever. Although now that I think about mine, we visited the in-laws for a lot of our honeymoon. I hadn't met any of them before as they are in Kuala Lumpur and only dh's brother came to our wedding. It actually wasn't too bad (or perhaps I've just blocked it from my memory) except that dh refused to have sex in his parent's house, on our honeymoon. Fortunately we did get away to see other parts of Malaysia and stay in hotels for part of the holiday.

CarGirl · 17/04/2008 11:03

Lots of headaches so you can go and have a lay down on your own.....

Original poster
booblue · 17/04/2008 11:06

When they came 2 stay last time.I did get drunk(not grown up I know)

When dh nipped out the nxt day.She went to her room after telling me I must drink water as to not get in SUCH a state.....

dh didnt have a problem

Was in a state from her not drink

OP posts:
Original poster
booblue · 17/04/2008 11:14

Sister-in-laws are o.k
Both in their 40`s
One of them her husband left 5 months ago 4 another woman.So she does need a break .
But this is first holiday in 25 years without him so thats going to be tough 4 her

The other one well where do I start????

They dont drink or smoke

OP posts:
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