To want my children to be able to play....

[Quadrophenia]

in the garden without constantly having to deal with the neighbours children aswell.
Okay have lived here for 6 years, fter first year my next door neighbours kids started leaning over the half fence towards the bottom end of the garden. TBH as their children are older than our eldest we weren't overly impressed as at that time ours were only three and two. Anyway to solve this problem we put a six foot fence up, to which they started climbing on something and leaning over. This has been a daily occurence for the last 5 years when the weather is fine. Recently they put a shed backing onto the fence and now the children sit on the roof with their legs dangling in. It greatly infringes on our privacy, even if my children go out to play early they are there, it is very rare that my children can go out in the garden without them being there. We bought a new tent last week and even putting that up as a family event was interupted by constant comments etc. The children aren't particularly horrible or anything, but they can get involved in rows between my children and sometimes I just want to deal with my own kids without dealing without the added hassle of other people. Today for example one of my twins fell out with the other, the elder boy(aged 11) was telling my other dd that her sister was a tell tale and a jimmy cheesecake, stupid i know but upsetting for her sister whne all she wants is to play in her own garden. So in essence i end up having to bring my children inside to resolve the situation. I don't feel comfortable chastising the other children as they aren't mine. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr not sure what the resolution is, but am I unreasonable to feel totally fed up with this.

Squirdle the fact that i like my neighbours too does make it more difficult, I wish i'd nipped it in the bud years ago. Btw when the children actually come round, they are very well behaved and polite etc, like i say nice children really, but their behaviour can be different when over the fence as they are not at my house iyswim

we are doing a fair bit in our garden atm so it won't seem highly unusual to just plonk up a trellis... I can't tell them to get down from their shed roof though as it is their shed.

YANBU, I have the same problem with our next door neighbour's child. I often feel like the unpaid childminder. I sometimes ask what her mum's doing? (subtle I know!) and the answer is usually have a lie down or some other nice relaxing child free activity, to which I reply "lucky her" in a loud voice

Yes I know what you mean, I am reluctant to say anything too much to my neighbours about their son as I do like them, but if he did something really bad then I would.

If you did speak to them, you could just say that you know it's not a huge deal, but could she stop them from leaning over the fence as you aren't getting any privacy.

Failing that, would your children be able to totally ignore them when they are leaning over. It would be boring then, so might stop them. Pretend they aren't there. Sounds rude but if it's the only way.....

I have told my children to ignore them when there are problems and often they do because sometimes they just want to play thier own games which is fair enough.

We have the same problem with our neighbours children. The minute ours go in the garden, they are also out there, and it really annoys me. We are putting in a tall fence soon but they have a large climbing frame with a tower so they will just climb on that. I'm all for children playing with each other but I do want some privacy some times in my own garden.