To wonder why some people think they’re hilarious?

[CrowdofHats]

In a shop earlier, queuing behind a middle aged bloke. He was being served and at the start handed over his loyalty card and said “That means I get my shopping for free”. The Assistant raised a polite smile, and carried on serving him.

Got to the end and she swiped the loyalty card and he said loudly, to the queue, “does that mean I’m getting them for free then?”. Assistant didn’t acknowledge and told him the price and he said “Not free then, you’ve ruined my day there!”. He then paid and said “free next time!” as he was leaving.

I don’t know why it got on my nerves so much. Just the tedious, crap, repetitive joke, and the general air of “I’m hilarious me”.

Or am I being a total misery?

There’s a bloke who comes into my workplace regularly to collect an order. He always does this:

Him: “Hello, you all right?”
Me: “Yes, thanks.”
Him: “Oh, I thought you were half left actually.”

And then he waits for a a polite “ha ha ha.”

I can’t stand it.

So now, I'm wise to him, I make a point of responding to his “ Hello, you all right?” with “I’m very well thanks.” Or something where his hilarious joke won’t work. You can see him hesitate and realise he’s not got the upper hand. Quite satisfying really.

I have a friend who used to be a stand up comedian. The phrase 'used to be' is the key here. Because he is used to getting laughs professionally (ie, around 30-40 years ago, he's in his eighties) he thinks he's the life and soul. If he goes out he's cracking all these 'jokes' which might be been acceptable 40 years ago but are decidedly off-colour now. It's embarrassing.

He doesn't go out much now, of course, he's practically housebound, so I get a string of his best stand up routines whenever I visit. It's getting somewhat hard to smile when he launches into his 'why do women wear nail varnish on their toes' routine (trust me, it's not funny). I've tried to educate him that we don't talk like that nowadays - and get a whole stream of how we're now all too 'woke'...

There is no helping some people. Especially men.

Yes, it is always men. And it's always middle aged and older men who think they're soooooooooo funny. Absolutely hilarious they think they are, with their dumb dad jokes and constantly repeating the same fucking lines and 'hilarious quips.'

My DH (late 50s) is like this some days... He never used to be, it started at around 42-43. He doesn't do it all the time (and is not as bad as he used to be, because I've had a go at him a few times (because he sounds so ridiculous, and I'm embarrassed for him,) but he does think he's so funny and he's really not! I mean he CAN be funny sometimes without trying, when he is just kind of being himself, but the stupid 'dad jokes' and the 'I'm so funny aren't I' side of him is annoying.

eg. a cashier says 'do you want cash back?' And he says, 'is it free?' And when he goes to pay for something he says 'is it buy one get one free?' At least a third of the time we go out he says this. (Or something equally as stupid and unfunny.) Sometimes the cashier just kind of rolls her eyes - and other times she sort of half laughs (politeness.) I used to say to him 'you're not funny you know - you say this every single time!' He says 'well she laughed - she clearly thinks I'm funny.' (NO, she is being polite. You are the 20th middle aged man today to say the same fucking stupid thing.)

About 10 years ago, I was absolutely fucking fuming with him. This woman was coming towards us out of Morrisons (with a trolley,) when we were on the way in. DH grinned at her and said 'got a driving licence for you that have you love?' She just stared ahead and completely ignored him ...

When she was out of earshot, he said 'She was a miserable ignorant cunt.' I was aghast. I said 'How dare you? Maybe she just didn't want to engage in conversation with some random middle aged bloke who think he's funny.' He said 'no - she was just a miserable ignorant cunt.'

I said 'no she wasn't! I don't know who think you are. She didn't owe you a response or a conversation. How would like it if some random man tried to engage with me and called me a miserable ignorant cunt when I ignored him?' He just shrugged his shoulders. Didn't say anything like that again when I called him out through. Not to me anyway!

Yeah. Sure you did. Fairly appropriate story though.

I'm an optometrist and people say the same thing a lot.

They're just trying to engage, be friendly, interact. It's not a huge ask to humour them.

(I have seen a lot of pictures of people's dogs/grandchildren etc)

I worked in a bank for a few years and like every other customer facing job, you get the awful jokes and lines. We had amazing customer service training (a whole month before we were allowed near a customer!) and one thing that was emphasised was that my interaction with a customer might be the only interaction that person has had all day, maybe all week! So yes they might make a terrible joke but faking a laugh and wishing them a good day might literally make their day. Not saying it wasn’t exhausting and sometimes frustrating but it did help 🤷‍♀️

I.AM.FUCKING.HILARIOUS

I don't really say my jokes out loud though. They are in my head and you would regularly find me bursting out laughing while doing mundane things like the grocery shopping by myself.

And then I laugh at myself for laughing.

"I wonder why she never seems to want to come out with you........"

@PerkyMintDeer both of your very long posts seem to indicate two completely different personalities. You tolerated misogyny at your workplace, but as a younger woman you gave an Oscar winning performance after a funeral. Hmmm

Ya absolutely not bu

Having worked in hospitality for years frumpy women are the fucking worst for this and they really can't read the room to the point of it becoming unsettling.

Why can't people just leave service staff alone

its always men who have hit middle age

thankfully now I am middle aged I rarely get to hear these tedious comments

and it’s not for women to correct mens behaviour it’s for them to realise themselves they are tedious bores

I get that it's tedious. But for some people, older men in particular,that interaction on at the til might be the only human conversation they have all day. They might not be good at the conversation and it might be a bit off colour as a result. But that's because they don't get much practice anymore. I work with older people and I hear the same jokes from the same people all the time. It can get a bit irritating. But I smile anyway, because that's all they've got and it costs me nothing.

I'm a powered wheelchair user

The amount of times I've had

HOPE YOU'VE PASSED YOUR TEST LOVE

Every. Single. One. thinks they are a true original and a great wit.

It's always men of a certain age. Always.