Getting her out her room?!

[BunnyLily]

So my daughter is nearly 12, I separated from her Dad over a year ago. She just loves her bedroom and bed! I have an 8yr old that’s constantly playing around - they get on and then they don’t like most kids I suppose - but don’t think the 12yr old is impressed most the time so prefers her room! I’m always wanting to do things with them but it’s limited as they both don’t want to do the same thing. She does come out 3-4 days a week and out with her Dad one day. And we have been on holiday and she’s coming away again soon. I just hate that she just lies in bed for 2-3 days at a time just going to the bathroom and coming down for food. She watches her phone and listens to music and she’s fab at going to school. Perhaps I should leave off?!

personally as long as she is joining in when it comes to having days out and things which she is I would let her have a couple of days relaxing in her room.

You could involve her more in meal prep and whatever if you want her down more but I wouldn’t push it too much.

You have a choice, force her out & deal with big tantrums or go with he flow & accept she will eventually emerge like a butterfly from her self enforced cocoon, for brief periods to begin with & only spend time with her friends by about 16 she'll never be in the house & around 20 she should be almost pleasant to spend time with.
Mum of 3, oldest 2 DS now morphed into decent humans, 15yr old DD in the emerging phase. I've learnt its not worth forcing the issue, life is a lot pleasanter to let this phase pass just as we did the toddler tantrums

Thanks both… think I’m stressing too much 🙈 I’ll let her be a bit more! Her sister is hard work and I wish I could hide in my room a bit more 😂🙈

Honestly I think she’s fine for her age and family situation. Obviously if she shows signs of distress that would be alarming but it sounds like she just needs peace to recover, and between school and what I would personally consider a lot of other social interactions, I’m not at all surprised! It’s tiring being that age too.

My DD spent all her spare time from 11-14 in her room, she emerged a fully fledged teenager. I worried too, but she's now 27 and has a good circle of friends, hobbies and now a good job so I wouldn't fret!