To think the more your earn…

[RealSryo]

The less you want to spend? I have noticed that the more I have available to me, the pickier I am. When I was younger and earned less I sort of accepted it would just make ends meet so I didn’t care how it was spent… not sure if that makes sense. But the more I’ve earned the more I think twice? Is this a common thing? Or maybe I’m just older and wiser now?

Na, not for everyone, otherwise there would be no such thing as 'lifestyle creep'. Im older but not yet wiser, still spend to my means 😬😂

I don't think Elton John would agree.

I can afford to be pickier about the things I do need; once, I bought only the cheapest because my finances were so finely balanced. Now I can afford to choose better quality things, they tend to be better made, so last longer, so i am a bit pickier, because there's more choice within what I can afford.

But I never really saw shopping as a leisure activity and I've always done running repairs on clothes, like sewing on loose buttons. So I still don't just buy stuff (except books.) I imagine people who really enjoy shopping just buy more as money allows.

Sounds like you reject things you once would have bought - but mainly because you can afford better now.

I've never earned more but also never been poorer. Every month I'm in overdraft, feeling sick at the creeping cost of bills and making ends meet. We have two toddlers in nursery and it's £3300 a month just for their nursery fees. More than the mortgage. I want to love and enjoy their childhood but at the same stage, I'm longing for school just so I can feel like I'm keeping the wolf from the door.

So re your post, I can't say I do - but when I don't have nursery fees to pay, perhaps I'll feel it.

Hmmm....yes and no. But it's interesting to ponder. I think lifestyle creep is a definite thing, and there are lots of things that are 'normal' to us now we are older and more comfortable financially, that younger me would have thought of as fairly decadent and indulgent (I'm thinking more expensive wine, fancy food generally, a cleaner, gardener and ironing lady, and little things like a few subscription apps etc.). However, I do think I am far less likely to get my head turned by expensive things (or expensive looking things) or new things just for the sake of it. Like I think I cared more when I was in my first house in my 20s that I had a smart looking matching pan set and thought it was the bees knees, but now I have a messy collection of different pans that I've collected over the years and have no interest in replacing any until something falls off them then I order a new one from Amazon.

If I were to summarise the drivers, I think younger me was more concerned with things that looked expensive, so there was maybe an element of status spending, and older me is mostly concerned with things that improve my quality of life.

Surely, as you get older (and tend to earn more via promotions etc), you don't have as much need to spend money because you'll have already bought most of the stuff you need previously?

You only need a replacement car every 5-10 years, you only need a bigger house when your family grows, you've already bought a mobile phone, ipad, laptop, HiFi unit, etc. You've already spent money on your hobbies so will already have the equipment etc you need to do it.

I certainly don't go around having more expensive holidays, or a new car every 2/3 years, or a bigger house, etc just because I can afford to. I'm happy with all the "gadgets" I have, happy with my equipment for hobbies, etc. Quite simply, I don't "need" to spend money on replacing/improving what I've bought previously. Happy going on the same kind of holidays I was going on 10/20 years ago.

Of course, it's optional, you "could" buy a bigger house, go on holidays to Australia, replace your VW car with a BWM, etc., but you don't "need" to, and can continue to have your life without. Whereas when you start out, you do NEED things like a home, car, etc etc.

I've found the same OP our income increased significantly at the end of last year and I'm much fussier with clothes. Better quality, I don't want it if hasn't got pockets or wrinkles easily. I keep getting updates from Monzo saying I spent less than usual this month. I wonder if it's like with a diet, being on a diet makes you think about food all the time, planning and obsessing and counting, maybe being on a budget has the same impact

This.

i think priorities definitely change. For us, we wanted a good sized house and plot of land as now we have kids we spend a lot of time at home (and also because the quality of food in restaurants seems to have dropped so we mainly eat/entertain at home).

I used to be bothered about nice cars and designer clothes and now I honestly don’t - we drive old cars and barely clothes shop other than for the kids.

@WinterAconite 😂

My priorities have changed.

I'm less bothered about trends. I buy better quality but replace things far less often. And I treat money with more respect, thinking longer term. I have fewer earning years left, so I'm focused on making sure there is sufficient to help ds with university.

The more we earn the busier we are, I've not got time to shop. I'd like a new kitchen but can't be bothered with decisions and disruption, the money is sat there waiting.

Not sure about earnings but I definitely find it easier to 'go without' when it's a choice than when it's enforced. I presume that is to do with feeling in control and perhaps also not knowing when the next opportunity will arise. So if we can't really afford a takeaway I might desperately want one but when I know we can easily afford it I generally feel less bothered, just as an example. I think when you're comfortably off you know that you can always make the choice to buy the thing another day whereas when times are tight you know that's not the case so spending seems more urgent. Agree with others' comments about status too but there are obvious exceptions, Elton John being only one!

Were you not always frugal though? But didn't notice you were as you would end up spending most of it due to lack of funds?
Or are you saying you used to buy Audis but now buy 10 year old Peugeots?

No I'm the opposite. When I was very hard up I'd dither about every purchase asking myself over and over if I really wanted it, wanted that version of it, would rather have that than something else because it had to be either/or. Often to the point where I'd end up not bothering at all. Now I know if I buy the blue jumper and find I could actually have done with the green one, no big deal I'll get the green as well. I'm also far more likely to take chances, trying out products or activities, going places I don't know if I'll like or not because it's not the end of the world and there's more to come, so I'm more adventurous.

There are definitely things that I used to covet that I no longer do now that are easily affordable. I suppose they just don’t seem as luxurious now.