Should I give up on learning to drive?

[BabyICantDriveMyCar]

I've clocked up 60 hours of lessons.

I'm in my 40s, and prior to starting these lessons, I had zero experience of learning to drive. In fact, I never thought I'd get as far as this, as I have a lot of anxiety around cars due to traumatic childhood experiences.

For the first few months, I did much better than I thought I would. But now I feel I've hit a wall with my confidence. I'm fine with driving round the residential streets and main roads that I'm used to from my lessons. But I seriously lack confidence with dual carriage ways and large roundabouts. I'm finding them really hard. I can't imagine ever being able to manage ones that I'm not familiar with. As for motorways, forget it.

I also struggle with positioning. I have terrible spatial awareness. My positioning is OK the majority of the time, but definitely not all of the time.

I've spent a lot of money on lessons. I live in London, and I can manage without driving. Driving would certainly be very convenient, but I've managed in life so far.

So shall I just cut my losses? I honestly wonder if I'm capable of driving.

Don’t give up

most people that drive have low IQ but confidence. You can do it

I'm 41 and passed my test last week. I HATED lessons. I would feel sick before every single lesson (even started a thread about it). I struggled with hesitation on roundabouts and had no confidence in myself. But since passing and driving my own car (which I only starting driving on the day of my test) I have started to enjoy driving.

This is a good question.

If I passed, I'd like to be able to drive to some work meetings. Currently, I take public transport to work, which if fine. But I often have meetings in other locations that are badly connected by public transport and take unreasonably long time by public transport.

That sounds like me! How many hours of lessons did it take?

I think it was 40hrs with no driving with anyone else. I watched a lot of YouTube driving videos which really helped too (i can list some if you want like?). Every lesson my instructor would say 'you just need to be confident', like it's a switch, ha. I took kalms and rescue remedy for lessons and my test which I think helped (or were a placebo).

I would agree with those who suggested trying a different instructor in the first instance.

Please don't give up! I started lessons aged 46!! I was terrified of driving (my exH drove like a maniac and told me often I'd never be able to drive). I started learning with the most wonderful guy in an automatic car and passed 2nd time. For me it was life changing - turns out when I'm in control of the car I have no fear at all. I've taken my teens on so many amazing adventures in my own car. We even toured the whole of Wales over the summer in 2022, something we will never forget and it's built my confidence up so much. Find a new instructor and opt for automatic, focus on the end goal .. freedom! Best of luck. 🚗🚗