Feel utterly broken - another diet failed again

[nameeCha]

I’ve just done 3 weeks of solid Atkins, not cheated, really tried a d lost nothing! Not even a measley 0.1 kg! I actually weigh slightly more than I did when started. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m fed up of all these “diets”. Can someone please advise me? I stayed away from fruits even! I had such a craving. Just spoke to my sister whose managed to lost 10lb since start of summer eating all the foods I was told on atkins and keto boards that were to be avoided - bread, fruits, pastries. Where am I going wrong? Any advice please.

10kg heavier than you but 1ft taller than you. 1200 cals a day (log EVERYTHING on MFP) works for me.

The website can only give you estimates. Pick any number from any of the websites. Track your food for two weeks. Unless triggering, weigh yourself every day and figure out your weekly average weight. At the end of the fortnight, if your weight is going down - you are on the right track. If your weight stayed the same/increased, cut 5% from the calories you were eating. Repeat every fortnight and adjust as needed.

Yes it definitely feels it too. But once it hit me how overweight I was getting that was miserable too

ive struggled with weight all my life and tried keto and fasting. They’re supposed to make you less hungry but doesn’t work for me. I have a ridiculous appetite and the only thing that works for me is counting calories.

ive not finished with this stretch of dieting and think im just going to have to calorie track all my life so I don’t just put it back on again

Different things work for different people. It's finding what's right for you. I'm calorie counting with a focus on protein.

Could you give up meat?

I don't eat anything that comes from an animal and genuinely don't feel deprived. There are plant based versions of pie, quiche, cake, anything- I genuinely can't think of one thing I'm missing out on. I'm so much happier and healthier since going vegan. It's a myth that I'm restricted.

I eat 3 healthy meals and sometimes one small snack a day.

I only eat chocolate on Sundays.

I drink lots of water every day and walk everywhere (the walking is key). I also plank and run when it's not so hot. Planking is great as you can build up gradually and don't need any equipment or to leave the house.

A typical day:

Hot lemon water

Protein shake

Breakfast Porridge with banana and peanut butter or granola and yoghurt or Weetabix and fruit etc.

Snack generally only fruit

Dinner / tea ideas chickpeas curry, pizza, beans on toast, jacket potato, pasta, salad, many other things. I love tofu scramble and eat chickpeas.

I've just started intermittent fasting but only once a week as I'm already slim with a bmi of 18.7.

The above is not a 'diet' to me, it's lifelong because I enjoy it and that really is the game changer imo. It's mindset. There is no 'bandwagon' to fall off, it's just how I genuinely enjoy living. I'm teetotal.

Could you try and make small changes over time with a view to it being sustainable rather than 'going on a diet'.

Hannah Adkins and simmnet nutrition are 2 good YouTubers on this subject.

Work out how many calories you are eating now and record it (see earlier message) only then will you be able to reduce it and by how much, everyone is different. The numbers quoted on web sites are generalisations so dont mean a lot.

If you are not losing weight then you are using up just the calories/energy from what you eat on a daily basis and you need to reduce the calories to start losing weight, it is a simple equation.

In theory you can eat all your existing foods just less of them in a day/week, but best if you swap some for lower calorie versions.

1950 calories a day?

If you're running miles and miles and strength training each day, then yes

If not, I'd say about 1100 calories a day, counting every little thing which goes into your mouth (drinks too) and walking each day

Is this your most recent diet or what you ate before you started trying to lose weight?

I have lost a third of my body weight and two years later it has stayed off. Here's what I did/am doing:

• No food is banned. Instead, I reduce portion sizes and frequency of consumption. This was key for me as I did not have to go through even one cycle of restricting and then bingeing.
• I consulted a dietician who reviewed my diet and suggested changes based on my likes/dislikes.
• I made slow changes to my diet, allowing time for me to adjust before adding more.
• I did not make any changes I was not prepared to keep up indefinitely.
• Logging everything on MyFitnessPal and being strict about measuring my portions so that the logging is accurate.
• I added exercise for a mental health boost, which made it easier for me to make good food choices.

I find using My Fitness Pal a real help. It makes you accountable for every single calorie and it’s the only way I’ve ever lost weight. It also means you can eat whatever you like, just not quite as much of it.

I keep reading things like 'no food is banned', 'everything in moderation', 'healthy muffins/protein bars/cereals', et cetera.

When in fact everything to do with diet and healthy eating gets infinitely easier if one cuts down/out sugar and refined carbs, especially UPFs.

By eating lean protein, healthy fats and vegetables we can remain satiated and avoid the glucose and insulin spikes that feed our cravings.

Lots of books and websites explain this, but I found Dr Mark Hyman's The Blood Sugar Solution particularly illuminating.

Thank you everyone so much. I’m sat here eating cookies now! I will start from tomorrow just felt really low. My sister just messaged me out of the blue telling me she’s off out with her friends this week. We’re not close at all and I think she does this to make me feel worse about myself as I told her recently I feel really fat and ugly and just want to hide away. It wasn’t sent in a way to say “hey join us!” It was like gloating. I think I’m going to stay away from people who trigger my overeating. Sorry for sharing too much I just wanted to put that out there. I know I should see that as motivation but I just feel life is passing me by.

Thank you got all the tips and advice, I will definitely start from tomorrow when I’m in a positive grave of mind.

I'm sorry you are so down, @nameeCha . Avoiding people who make you feel bad is a good start.

Can you also find people, interests, activities that lift your spirits? Me, I like reading, listening to music and looking at art books, and watching kittens and other stuff on YouTube.

Tomorrow is another day. Stop buying cookies and sugary stuff and you'll have made a good start.

Maybe there is a Meet-up group that might be of interest to you, or some other interest group in your neck of the woods?

I'm 32 and I'm back to intermittent fasting. I go til about 2pm before I eat. I know some people prefer to fast in the evenings but it would make me miserable so I make the timing work for me.
A massive thing I have found as well is cutting out snacks. Good meals mean you shouldn't need to snack (unless you have a medical issue which means you need to eat regularly).
Portion is definitely a big thing as well.
And getting in regular exercise to boost your metabolism and mental health.

Thank you.

It’s really difficult to go to these groups when I’ve got kids at home. I just feel lonely most of the time even though I have loads of siblings and nieces and nephews! I just feel alone. Maybe thats where the emotional eating comes from.

At 76kg you’re not that overweight so it’s unlikely a few weeks will show a huge weight loss. The quicker it comes off, the quicker it will go back on. It’s hard, but you need to think in terms of sustainable weight loss. Are you never going to eat carbs again? You didn’t put on weight overnight so you can’t expect to lose it overnight. You need to look at things you can do that can be easily incorporated so you can sustain it long term.

The thing with Atkins or low carb is that you must limit and be very conscious of how much veg etc you have, especially in the induction phase. You can't just eats loads unlimited green veg.

Induction tends to end up being predominantly high protein and fat but they key is you only eat until you don't feel hungry ( rather than feeling full) and end up getting used to eating less and therefore having a lot less calories.

The induction period is meant to be a minimum of 2 weeks and less then 20g of carbs a day.

Once you are losing weight you ramp up the carbs until you find a limit for maintaining. You can increase this by increasing activity levels.

Yeah, eating less is whats known as going on a diet!!!!

Why are people so keen to say dont diet

It just means eating less calories or burning more calories (by which ever way works) to put you in calorie deficit to lose weight

All these posts talking about 'dont diet, just walk more' well that is dieting, its making sure your body is in calorie deficit, there is no other way to lose weight despite what millions of pounds worth of books will say.

That seems a lot more accurate. Im 5'5, and 66kg and 10 years older than OP and I maintain at around 1500.

Ive been doing walking for fitness and strength and the watch thing I use also calculates calories (I dont pay much attention to it) but the calories I use on an hour long brisk walk (3.5mph) is pitiful. Good job I dont rely on it to enable me to eat more.

So if I do a walk today my calories burnt will be in the region of around 1700. That is quite low to maintain so its very easy to gain weight.

Mounjaro has been life changing for me. It is worth looking in to.

I've spent my whole adult life yo-yo dieting. The only thing that worked for me is mounjaro.

You need to take self responsibility. Eating cookies, feeling sorry for yourself, and cutting yourself off from people because they socialise isn't going to help.

No one can trigger you into eating, that's your choice. Personally I would cut out breakfast and have a nice lunch and dinner. Low bread and lots of water.

@RunningThroughMyHead thabk you. I know you’re right. It’s just so hard to get out of that mind set! But yes I agree it’s not going to help

I get it. It’s really hard. I know exactly where my eating issues came from.

I am over weight. And losing it. Because it clicked one day that regardless of why I do it, it’s me that does it. I am responsible for putting the weight on. But the good thing is that made me realise that if i am the one responsible. Then it is within my control to lose it.

The first thing I did was increase my fibre intake. I didn’t change anything else at first. Then I increased my protein. Not by huge amounts but increased it. Then I started weighing myself. I get weighed everyday with some scales that connect to my phone and don’t actually look. The up and down of the scales can be really depressing. I only look once every two weeks and in 4 weeks I am down 10lb. But the fact that I can see the scales went up and down in that time (but overall are on a downward trend) really helped. It doesn’t matter if one day it goes up. There could be all sorts of reasons for it. It’s made me less afraid of the scales.

in the last few days I have started calorie counting and it’s really opened my eyes to how much I used to eat. And eat thinking ‘oh it’s not that bad’ or ‘I have eaten much today’ when in fact I had eaten huge amounts. Even healthy things. I bought a jacket potato with beans and cheese from the food van at work and weighed it the other day. It was twice as many calories as I had previously input when I have done calorie counting before. I had estimated a medium sized potato. Half can of beans and 40g of cheese. But actually weighing it showed it was over twice as much as I had guessed.

I have never felt losing weight was easy (I have some additional health issues) but I feel really at peace with losing it and not like I am on a diet. At the weekend, we had a Burger King as we were in a long journey and grabbed a drive thru but I was still under my calories for the day. I am not missing out or depriving myself or going hungry.

It’s not an easy road. But it’s one worth taking, imo.

@Hectorscalling thank you so much. Well done on the weight loss! That’s such an amazing achievement. Yes you are right it’s under my control and I’m the only one who can change it! I’ve actually woken up early today and im going to the gym! Can’t believe I feel motivated.

I have made a spreadsheet to keep track of my weight. It colour codes my daily weight from start to desired, also colour codes my daily calorie intake, calculates weight left to lose, calculates calories left (or gone over) for the day and every seven days it calculates an average of my weight for that week compared to the average of the previous week.

The last feature really helps on days like today, where I have supposedly gained weight on the two days I've stuck to my limit, while on the two days I've gone slightly over before I appear to have "lost" weight, but my average is still -1kg on the previous week's average, so the slight gain doesn't matter and is likely down to being on my period. It keeps me sane.

I might add a column that lets me track my average calorie count for the week, too, to see how it compares to what the online calculator suggests.

I add my daily weight every morning and add my calories eaten as I go along.

Might be worth making one for yourself if you're halfway decent at spreadsheets? If not, I'm sure there are apps that can do all of this for you.