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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be upset and unsettled about a dr lying?

52 replies

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:36

I’ve had a bad year couple of years. Things have happened which have affected my MH. I was put under the local MH trust and diagnosed with PTSD. I’ve been having phone appointments with a psychiatrist. I had an appointment in spring, and the dr said to increase the meds to 3 a day. But never sent a letter to gp. I had a July appointment booked by he never called. A few days later I get a letter saying I had missed two appointments and I was being dropped as a patient. I hadn’t missed 2, only 1 as he hadn’t called. So I emailed the pals of the trust and told them what had happened and told them my meds hadn’t been upped as agreed in appointment. And no letter had been sent. The nice lady said did I want her to informally approach the dr and get it sorted. I said yes. 2 weeks later I get an email saying the dr concerned reports to them he had spoken to me and I didn’t want to make a formal complaint and that I was upset that a receptionist had been rude and that he was going to tell her manager and sort it. And I’m now happy. Problem is I’ve not spoken to him at all. He’s lying. I had no issue with any receptionist, it’s him who hasn’t called and not done a gp letter. I queried with the pals lady if there had been a mix up and he wasn’t talking about me but she assures me he was referring to me. It’s now automatically going to a formal investigation as I’ve told them he’s lying. But why would a dr lie like this? I’m confused, been left feeling unsettled and I know don’t feel I can trust the dr at all. I asked for my notes and there’s no notes from each appointment, nothing at all which seems strange. A prescribing nurse called and has sorted my meds but I’m left feeling very unsettled. I don’t want to be under him anymore. Has anyone has a similar experience?

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:38

What is likely to happen?

OP posts:
macaroniandcheeze · 09/08/2024 17:38

Absolutely complain. If the GP is lying about you seeing him can you contact the practice manager and get them to access the appointment diary and CCtv for that day.

NowyouhaveDunnett · 09/08/2024 17:39

It does sound like he mixed you up with someone else. Very weird and I'm not surprised you are 🤔
I hope you are ok.

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:39

It’s the psychiatrist in a mh trust. One who is known for failing people.

OP posts:
romdowa · 09/08/2024 17:40

Is the Dr confusing you with another patient with the same or similar name / details?

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:40

The trust is a failing one and the dr is senior dr in the trust.

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:41

I queried this but I have a very, very unique name and the pals lady said they had looked into that and it’s not a factor.

OP posts:
DaisyFloop · 09/08/2024 17:42

I really feel for you. It could be that he forgot and has been digging a hole for himself but to be honest I think some people don't care.

When I was in about the midwife told me I was 4cm, she went off shift and another midwife came in telling me to push. I said I'm only 4cm and she said I need to push. Me and my daughter were in hospital for 2 weeks, I nearly died, she was resuscitated. A doctor came in and baby had no heartbeat so got rushed into emergency c section.
I ask to see my notes and the midwife telling me to push said I was 9cm before I got into the pool. I was in the pool before she got there and 4cm. I don't know if she lied because we nearly died or whatever but my trust is completely gone. There's also stuff on my medical records I don't recognise and a letter than was never sent saying I had coeliac disease (I had a phone call saying bloods were fine and had no idea until 2 years later when new doctor said on my file my bloods came back as coeliac)
So I suppose what I'm trying to say is you're not on your own and I hope you get some results because they shouldn't get away with it

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:42

it’s affecting me and making me unsettled and edgy. I’ve asked for him not to contact me in case he was planning to phone and to get me to drop it.

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:44

DaisyFloop · 09/08/2024 17:42

I really feel for you. It could be that he forgot and has been digging a hole for himself but to be honest I think some people don't care.

When I was in about the midwife told me I was 4cm, she went off shift and another midwife came in telling me to push. I said I'm only 4cm and she said I need to push. Me and my daughter were in hospital for 2 weeks, I nearly died, she was resuscitated. A doctor came in and baby had no heartbeat so got rushed into emergency c section.
I ask to see my notes and the midwife telling me to push said I was 9cm before I got into the pool. I was in the pool before she got there and 4cm. I don't know if she lied because we nearly died or whatever but my trust is completely gone. There's also stuff on my medical records I don't recognise and a letter than was never sent saying I had coeliac disease (I had a phone call saying bloods were fine and had no idea until 2 years later when new doctor said on my file my bloods came back as coeliac)
So I suppose what I'm trying to say is you're not on your own and I hope you get some results because they shouldn't get away with it

How awful for you. I’m glad you are ok and your baby was ok. Xx

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:46

I feel betrayed because I told this dr everything. I had complete trust in him. That’s now shattered.

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:47

And a poor innocent receptionist has been thrown under the bus by him too.

OP posts:
MushMonster · 09/08/2024 17:50

Go ahead with the formal complaint.
That is very wrong of them.
My best side tells me they probably got confused between you and another patient and they really think they had spoken to you.
My incredulous side says they are in trouble for previous issues and do not want to risk having further misdemenours, so the lied, and got caught.
Either way, not your problem.
Go ahead with the complaint so your problem gets sorted. You need your proper meds and appointments.

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:58

im not sure what way it is but the pals lady was very sure he was talking about me. Aren’t drs subject to a code of ethics? I’m now worried he’s going to make out he did speak to me and that I’m crazy.

OP posts:
letsjustdothis · 09/08/2024 17:59

I wouldn't trust a doctor any more than I'd trust an estate agent or a recruiter.

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 17:59

The nurse that called says there should be notes from each session but she can’t see any either.

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:00

letsjustdothis · 09/08/2024 17:59

I wouldn't trust a doctor any more than I'd trust an estate agent or a recruiter.

I had completely trusted this dr as for my mh sake I’ve had to tell them things I don’t talk about. That’s why it feels such a betrayal.

OP posts:
EveryKneeShallBow · 09/08/2024 18:07

I met a senior consultant socially at a hobby I used to do. He was friendly, but completely unreliable and told ridiculous lies which were obvious to catch him out on, but whatever, it didn’t really affect me personally. After I’d left the hobby group I next saw him in the local newspaper. It turned out he wasn’t qualified as he had claimed and had left a woman partially paralysed after he operated on her. What’s worse, is the the Trust had received complaints about him for years but did nothing.

AgileGreenSeal · 09/08/2024 18:07

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:00

I had completely trusted this dr as for my mh sake I’ve had to tell them things I don’t talk about. That’s why it feels such a betrayal.

When you discover the truth about doctors (and other health ‘care’ workers) it does feel like a terrible betrayal.

I’m so sorry you have found out in such a damaging and unsettling way.

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:15

EveryKneeShallBow · 09/08/2024 18:07

I met a senior consultant socially at a hobby I used to do. He was friendly, but completely unreliable and told ridiculous lies which were obvious to catch him out on, but whatever, it didn’t really affect me personally. After I’d left the hobby group I next saw him in the local newspaper. It turned out he wasn’t qualified as he had claimed and had left a woman partially paralysed after he operated on her. What’s worse, is the the Trust had received complaints about him for years but did nothing.

That’s awful. How did he get away with it?

OP posts:
Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:16

AgileGreenSeal · 09/08/2024 18:07

When you discover the truth about doctors (and other health ‘care’ workers) it does feel like a terrible betrayal.

I’m so sorry you have found out in such a damaging and unsettling way.

I had talked about stuff that nobody else knows. I don’t know how to trust anyone else again in that mh trust.

OP posts:
Deadbeatex · 09/08/2024 18:16

I don't know the process of what will happen next so I've no advice I'm sorry. I just wanted to say this sounds scary and horrible and I'm so sorry this is happening to you. It would be awful with any Dr but it feels worse that it's an MH Dr who you bravely opened up to and it's no wonder you feel extra vulnerable.

I hope the investigation gets to the truth and you can get some answers x

EveryKneeShallBow · 09/08/2024 18:17

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:15

That’s awful. How did he get away with it?

He was full of bullshit, and bluster. And now he’s back to his African country of origin, possibly still practicing. But cannot ever practice here again, thank god.

Worriedmummy2400 · 09/08/2024 18:18

EveryKneeShallBow · 09/08/2024 18:17

He was full of bullshit, and bluster. And now he’s back to his African country of origin, possibly still practicing. But cannot ever practice here again, thank god.

I hope the woman sued the trust. He ran away. Coward. Though I doubt there were any real consequences for him.

OP posts:
bonzaitree · 09/08/2024 18:21

I would t be surprised. Doctors aren’t gods, they’re human beings. They make mistakes. Sometimes big ones!

They leave scalpels inside people when doing surgery. They amputate the wrong leg. They beat their wives and hit people at football matches and neglect their kids. They use drugs and are alcoholics.

Appalling but not surprising!

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