To be so bothered about a ladies long weekend away?

[TheSquashedPea]

Initially I thought it would be one day away and I’d get my own ticket. In a slightly drunken conversation I was asked if I could do longer, and then - as a very, very expensive present - I was gifted the long weekend instead of it being just one day. I feel very guilty about this, and have tried to pay back through presents/other gifts. I also felt guilty about leaving my young children for a more extended period. I did have fun, but felt like one member of the group disliked me. I went along with everything, but I think I annoyed this person by initially arriving late - then not asserting myself, and then I was very tired one day after staying out until 4am the day before. I had an accident the week previously and was finding it tricky to stand/dance for longer periods.

As soon as I sat for anything - I was met with ‘are you ok?? are you ok??’
I have come back feeling just - guilty! Guilty at leaving my family, guilty about someone paying for it all, and guilty that I might have looked exhausted. I’m also feeling shit from pissing off one member of the group, when I really didn’t mean to. AIBU?

Well said!

Sounds like hang-xiety ….

It’s a chat forum, not a formal writing exam. Personally I didn’t find it hard to read- maybe your ‘theory of mind’ ( 😂 ) isn’t as developed as you’d thought

This is a perfect example of the way MN is getting meaner. OP, your title is crystal clear and your first post makes it obvious what happened.
I agree with @olympicsrock. This is a lesson learnt: that you don't enjoy late nights and partying like you once did and your friends still do.
I completely understand why you'd feel guilty for not enjoying a gift you'd been given or what some may consider as a break away from the DC but you have to let that go. Focus on the bits you did enjoy and the friends you get on with and, next time, don't agree to over-committing during a drunken conversation!

Yes, exactly. Someone gave you a present. You spent some time away. You didn’t enjoy it. Someone appeared not to like you.

My default emotion is guilt when I’m not feeling at my best. I don’t know why, but it goes hand in hand with imposter syndrome and people pleasing. I have to give myself a talking to. CBT techniques can help a bit. Essentially stop overthinking things OP.

OP, there’s absolutely no point in feeling guilty - you’ve done it: it’s in the past, all,you can do is move on. If it made you feel like this, though, learn from the experience and don’t do it again, or just go for one night as you originally intended. We have all done things which, with the benefit of hindsight we would have done differently - all we can do is to try and learn from our mistakes (and not over- think things). I hope you actually enjoyed your time away!