To join a gym at 50.

[janiejamjar]

I'm Flabby, menopausal! Two stone overweight and would
Like to tone and work on strength BUT I've never been to a gym and am embarrassed at my body.
Would you join if you were me? I'd like to meet People too and make new friends now that I have a few free evenings a week.
Where do I Even start ?

Of course! There are people of all ages in every gym I've ever been to. I'd also look at class based exercise like Cross Fit or Orangetheory or locally owned independent ones as then you get coaches to teach you what to do. Can also highly recommend the Peloton app (you don't have to have the equipment to use the app) as the classes on there are brilliant.

100%. I encouraged my mum to go and she is in her late 60s and have never done any exercise. Gyms (for whatever reason) are seen as hostile places. It;s nothing like that. I have never met friendlier people in my life.
Start by booking an intro session with one of the staff and join a gym which offers classes. They are often less intimidating to join for a beginner.
Here is a bit of inspiration for you: https://www.trainwithjoanofficial.com/

@Catza "You can't turn the clock back but you can wind it up again" What a great quote!

Im in my 50’s OP and if you’re wanting to make friends I wouldn’t go for the cheapest gym going ( in my case a Pure Gym) unless you really want to have a go without the contract. Super cheap gyms attract youngsters and they’re not going to acknowledge your existence let alone make conversation with you. I’d look for something with a Pilates or yoga class as they tend to attract women ( and I’d have a go because it’s nice to have variety).

There are people of all ages and sizes at my super cheap gym. You definitely need some classes if you're looking to make some friends. Have a look at what's nearby and go look around a few.

CrossFit is amazing and so inclusive for all ages and abilities. It’s functional fitness so nobody is going to be judging your appearance. They’re more likely to be cheering your deadlift. Speaking of which, weightlifting is really good for middle aged and older women as it helps with muscle tone, posture and bone density.

Most CrossFit gyms offer a free taster session too.

Thanks! I am concerned that because I have absolute no core strength and am generally weak , I will be pushed hard by a trainer and that turns me
Off straight away. I need to go slow, at my own pace. Basic stuff but effective for my body's post menopausal
Needs re bone strength etc.
I'd like the option now and again if jumping on the treadmill / rowing machine etc but really it's weights and gradual toning, without making a fool of
Myself !

The right trainer will not push you too hard too fast. My advice would be to look for a more mature trainer who has experience of working with menopausal women (possibly female but my PT is a 47 year old beefy guy who knows more about the menopause than I do!) . Smaller more "boutique" gyms often do deals including classes and discounted PT sessions.

Get yourself down to a gym, you won't regret it!!!!

I was all those things 18 months ago, except I was 52. Joined a gym. Been strength training 3 times a week ever since.

Also (and I get bored of saying this on here but here I go again...) toning is not a thing. Burning fat is a thing, achieved by being in a calorie deficit through diet and exercise, and muscle growth is a thing, achieved through lifting weights and eating more protein (put very simply) but "toning" a muscle is not a thing. You can grow muscle which will give a more toned look but there is no such thing as "toning exercises" and anyone who sells that concept is a crap trainer imo.

My gym is quieter weekend afternoons. I am late 50s. No one bats an eyelid at the"larger" gym users of any age. There are classes that go on like Pilates etc, all full of women of all ages. There are also several members who look to be in their seventies though it is hard to tell. Get a personal trainer for a few sessions if you can afford it. We pay £20 for half an hour.

I will be pushed hard by a trainer and that turns me
Off straight away. I need to go slow, at my own pace.

This is 100% incorrect when you have a good trainer and you have been clear about your needs, limitations and expectations. If a trainer isn't listening and working for you, you change trainers. It really is imperative that you use a trainer to learn how to use weights properly.

You employ the trainer, OP, you're their boss. If you don't like the way they work, you sack them and find someone else. There are plenty of trainers out there who will meet your needs perfectly, so if you happen to find one who doesn't, bin them. This is your hobby, not theirs. They want your money, and if they're going to get you to book again, they need to do the job you need them to do.

That's how a decent PT would see it. I'm a decent PT, so I'd know!

Still CrossFit! Each session is led by a coach and you do the same workout but everybody goes at their own pace and adapts it to their own ability.

Each session is a mix of strength training (good for the bones) and cardio (good for the heart).

go to classes you literally just have to turn up
nothing worse than just wondering round gym floor looking at equipment and trying to work out what to do

classes are very inclusive make you feel like part of it even though you know no one and your there on your own

Do it OP. I am older than you and started with gym six months ago. I go to classes and also do gym on my own after having an introductory session and doing a couple of functional fitness classes. I love it. There are people of all ages and the instructors doing the classes give easy/hard variations of the exercises so everyone can join in. I thought it would be intimidating but it really isn't. I do a mix of pilates, Zumba, yoga, circuit training and HIIT. HIIT and circuit training in particular really surprised me - they are intense, but only in short bursts, and it turns out that this is a very manageable way for me to exercise that keeps me engaged. I had no idea! And I fucking love zumba. I do go to a former council run leisure centre though so I think it's sort of kept the ethos of being accessible for everyone, even though the council doesn't run it any more - it's run by some kind of no profit organisation. There are people older than me and people way younger than me who go there and it all works really well.

Do you have a Gymophobics nearby? They are a ladies gym. You do a session which lasts 30 mins and you do a circuit of ten exercises. Depending on what you want toning up or losing in an area, the instructors suggest exercises which will help.

I don’t like normal gyms as people stare at me. I’m two stone overweight myself and there are ladies who are much more overweight than me.

The worst thing people can do is join a weight loss club or gym with a friend. As seen it before if one is on holiday/ill/unable to make the meeting, you never see the other one attend alone. Then one gives up and the other gives up too

Yes most people my age at my gym go on their own. I do have people I chat to now though at classes I go to frequently. Some of the younger folk come in with a friend/partner - I guess it's easier to coordinate schedules at that stage of life. If I was waiting for my friends to be free at the same time as me I'd never get to any bloody classes.

Definitely go! I go to classes at my gym, Zumba, yoga, clubbercise, aqua fit, and there are people there of all ages, very welcoming and friendly, keen to show a newcomer the equipment if needed. I love it and have made friends too. We have a machine that connects to an app and does loads of body measurements which is a bit of added incentive. I’ve never noticed anyone staring at older members or at those with a bit of extra weight, we’re all just trying to get a bit fitter together. (I’m quite a lot older than you too!)

I joined a gym for the first time at the age of 50. I'm 55 now.

My usual gym is great in that it attracts an older clientele, so I enjoy the increasingly rare experience of being one of the younger people there! At the moment I've got a temporary job in another city, and am attending a gym with a lot of intimidatingly fit young students! But it's fine. Everyone is too interested in themselves to be bothered looking at me!

My friend and I are older than you, more overweight than you and joined 18 months ago. We don't go together.

I do PT which has improved my core strength, learned to swim and go to Aqua Aerobics 3 times a week.

The important thing with the gym is to go.

It took me until my mid forties to work out what makes me go. It's signing up to a class and being penalised if I don't go. The things that make you go however might be different.

I used to have PT and enjoyed it buy my trainer left and I didn't find someone else. Weight training is really good though for bone health and I'd suggest looking into it.

I'm obese and am often the fattest person in my gym but no one ever says anything. I occasionally catch dismissive looks but have then proceeded to out-plank the donor so many times I don't pay any attention any more.

The instructors are invariably pleasant and helpful to everyone.

The other thing that matters to me is looking the part - don't be the overweight person running on the treadmill in a sweatshirt/ heavy jogging bottoms. You just look daft and stand out more. Get some gym clothes - sports bra/ t-shirt and leggings. Honestly no-one will give you a second glance. You can either spend a lot (sweaty betty!) or a little (Decathlon). I have a mixture of the two. My two favourite pairs of leggings come from the two brands named above and the SB ones cost about five times more than the decathlon ones!

I do pilates a couple of times a week at least (I aim for 3 but that isn't always possible). Mixture of reformer/ mat. Some yin yoga to stretch out and I aim to get to spin twice. I reliably manage spin at least once, two pilates classes and one yoga class.

Work out if you will swim too - I pay more as my gym chain has pools and don't use it much. If I wanted to economise this would be something to look at.

I’m 55 and joined a gym a yea4 ago as I was 3 stone overweight and v v unfit. It’s one where you do a 45 minute session in a class and do weights and a bit of cardio. The instructor demonstrates then keeps an eye on everyone. There are all abilities.

i felt completely out of place for ages but have now got the hang of it. It’s friendly and unpretentious.

I’ve lost a stone and a half and fit into clothes I haven’t worn in ages.

I’ve improved my diet too…