Where did you get it?

[Ohjustpeasoff]

This is a lighthearted post. So there.

My SIL (DB’s wife) asks “where did you get it?” for pretty much every item I have ever worn, carried, or had on view in my home. Yesterday at DP’s for lunch we covered my shoes (Adidas, from their site), my trousers (New Look, pathetically I felt embarrassed for this as am 45 years old), my t-shirt (M&S, didn’t mention it was via Vinted, sorry Vinted) and my bag (Olivia Bonas).

On previous occasions at my house we’ve done the sofa, rug, dinner plates, a mug, a lamp… and endless more things I can’t remember right now. Aaarrrggghhh!!

Oh, and the equivalent from my MIL? “How was the traffic?” Every time we visit her (5 minute drive). Every time we have had a day out, been on holiday, popped to the supermarket, or walked down the street. Aaaaarrrrgggggghhhhh!

What eternal endless repetitively frustrating questions do you have in your families? Have you ever snapped?

"Did you get here all right?" When you have already arrived on time.

I feel like saying "No, I've just popped in to let you know I'm stuck behind a four car pile-up on the M25, I should be there in a few hours."

My mum always wants to know what I’ve had to eat if I’ve been out anywhere at all. Been to the park with daughter- did you have something to eat? they’ve got good food vans Been to Tesco- did you get something at the cafe? Been to the GP- did you go for a coffee after at that nice place next to it? I’m used to it by now but it drives my OH mad- he thinks my whole family is food obsessed (we are a bit!). She also seems fixated on whether me OH and daughter will have a holiday this year! Every time I see her it’s ’do you think you’ll get away this year?’ We haven’t had a holiday in a couple of years for various reasons. I think she thinks it’s a measure of how we are doing money wise. It is, but only the sense that things are a little tighter with cost of living etc and we had our garden landscaped a couple years ago for which we went into some debt. I haven’t the heart to say it’s none of her business!

My Dad's sister, that he only ever saw at Christmas, would always without fail greet him with, "hello FluffDad, how are you? Have you still got all your own teeth?"

What’s wrong with New Look?

I work in probate.

93 yo MIL: "are you busy at work?"
Me: "very busy"
MIL: "people still dying?"

Every. Single. Time.

Ex mil's topic of choice was bowel movements... I would love to have discussed traffic or shopping..

‘How was that’ every time I arrive at mum’s house after a 5 hour journey through the usual shite of roadworks etc on the M1. Super fun, ma, loved every minute of the torturous trip. Had a blast!

Aww I used to do this as a kid. I was painfully shy and didn’t have many friends, but really tried to make conversation and be “normal”. One day I started getting teased because I kept saying the same thing (“I really like your t-shirt/scrunchie/trainers, where did you get it?”) and suddenly everyone was laughing at me and I clammed up again for a couple of years. It’s so silly but honestly I think your SIL is just trying to be chatty and doesn’t realise she sounds like a broken record!

"We've got lovely weather down here, I expect it's quite chilly up there?" MIL who doesn't believe we ever see sunshine in Yorkshire (it's rare, but still..)

DM can be sitting on her phone with the clock showing in the top left corner and still ask everyone what the time is.

I've recently got an Apple Watch with the Mickey Mouse face and when you tap it Mickey's voice says the time out loud. I've been tapping him to answer DM instead of the rest of us having to do it now. 😁

True! I teach my ASD child how to chit chat: talk about the weather, comment positively on clothing/hair style etc.

Some of the examples above are funny though (« have you heard from Dave? » 😂) and to be fair it also depends on who is asking: same opening q from a work colleague is fine, maybe she struggles socially, but from my mum fair enough to have an invisible eyeroll I think.

Sorry for the derail.
Mine: have you had the result of X? When there is an official date for this result, for the whole country, frequently mentioned in the news and by me, still 5 months away. My mum still asks every other week.

When asked this type of question in Ireland we usually reply with "Penneys, hun...€5 too!"

Penneys is the Irish version of Primark.

Start answering with something along those lines. Don't actually tell her where you buy stuff. Tell her that you've started going to charity shops in the effort to reduce, reuse and recycle!

My mum does it, EVERY time it looks like you've dared put anything in your mouth.. What you eating now?!
Then at work a colleague went thru a stage of constantly asking me what I was eating now and it made me self conscious that she was questioning how much I eat lol. I said I felt like she was my bloody mother 🤔

Bet you've got one too. Everyone I know well has a little conversational fallback that they pull out when they don't have anything to say, because they want to avoid an awkward silence.

Except me. I love an awkward silence. Longer the better.

DM always starts conversations about her friend , who for the purposes of this post we will call Sandra, "You know my friend Sandra? Well...".

Yes I've known Sandra since I was 11 and went to school with her daughter. I am now in my late 50s.

Do you know that’s the same as my mum. “Oh your brother is traveling around Austria and Germany and Switzerland and Italy for two weeks!!! What are you doing again, long weekend in Wales? Hmm how nice.”

Time to kill off Dave I reckon

Oh hilarious. You spent all that money on that watch just for that feature, right?

Quite. I shop there and I'm in my 60s

When we have family birthdays/christmas my MIL always asks me where I got the gifts from. It’s said in a nice way “oh this/thats lovely, where’s it from?” But it drives me mad as I feel as if she wants to check it for either price, get one herself, just be nosey etc. I’ve started to respond now with “umm I’ve forgotten, online somewhere”!
I don’t mind being asked but it’s all the time!

Completely understand…

my mother always goes through a routine of the same questions… how are the dogs? Have I spoken to my daughter today? (When she is at uni), How is my boyfriend? And these are normally repeated several times…

oh and I like your shoes/ sandals/ dress… are they new?

also who cares where you buy your clothes?!

Oh and I often get asked how much everything costs… and I’ve started to say it’s rude to ask about money 🤣

A relative of mine married a man who could bore for England (among many other faults including fleecing her - another story). Every time we arrive after a journey from our house to theirs (same route for twenty years) he says,
'how was the journey?' then, inevitably, 'which way did you come?'.

It doesn't matter what you say he sucks air in and tuts, 'oh that's a mistake. You want to be taking the M3 to junction 2 and then take the B0453. I'd never come the way you have, it's madness.'

Then he will get his 1991 road atlas and want to show us how to get home more efficiently. I just want to say,
'brilliant idea, I'll get straight onto that homeward journey now as I can't wait to try it out'.

Once we put our bags down he asks how the weather is where we live and then ignores the answer and talking over me says 'of course, we have a micro climate here so we have better weather than you. You only have to drive 5 miles up the A6748 and it will be snowing'. He says this in December and in July.
Every. Fucking. Time.

Oh hilarious. You spent all that money on that watch just for that feature, right?

If I had known it was a thing I'd have definitely bought it sooner anyway. Mickey even sometimes adds a little laugh which makes it even funnier.

Of course DM did the "how much did that set you back?" thing but I actually got it on my phone contract so it's only around £7 a month and at that point I hadn't paid anything towards it yet so I was able to say "nothing yet" which was nice.