potential illegal immigration (family matter)

[redkiteonatree]

not sure where to report it. H is abusive in many ways. I am planning my exit but not easy as all DC have disabilities but work in progress. He currently spends his Summer in his country of origin (Arab place). He threated a while ago that he would throw me out of the home and bring his mum over to help with the DC (and suggested she would just overstay her tourist visa as nobody would know and she would just stay forever). I have reason to believe he is going to bring her over when he comes back and that he is plotting to throw me out of the house (jointly owned, mortgaged). I would like to contact the authorities with the hope that she is denied entry despite the visa. Does anyone know if that is possible? And whom should I contact? police? Boarder control? Home office? I am so worried about ending up homeless. He is not a caring dad and his mum is not a loving grandmother to my DC.

Woman's shelter would be my first call. They can advise further.
He can't throw you out of a jointly owned home. I would not focus on his mother at this point and focus on seeking legal advice about the divorce and everything it entails. Plus a support from shelter with DV situation.

Google ‘report an immigration or customs crime’ on the gov website. You can also telephone.
They will assess and take action according to the credibility of the allegation. Does MIL already have a visa?

I couldn't read and run. Sorry to read you are experiencing this. I'd urge you to contact an organisation that can provide you with professional advice to protect both you and your children. I hope you can get the help you need before he returns.

https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help

yes, was sorted earlier this year.

https://www.gov.uk/report-immigration-crime

But I very much doubt anything would be done, as a no immigration rules have been broken yet. You telling the Home Office that your husband told you his mother will overstay her visa will unfortunately be your word against his. Unlikely to cancel the visa off the back of that unless there is concrete evidence that she will overstay.

UK Visitor Visas are generally 6 months in length.

good point, thank you. I have bigger fish to fry than Mil. That is true.

yes, she has a 6 months visa valid for 10 years.

I really think you are focusing on the wrong thing.

How,old are your children? Do you work? Are you married? Do you have family support?

And I really hope that people can't stop other people from getting in the country and visiting their family on the say so of an estranged wife.

UKVI will have made checks to see that your MIL has a job/family/assets to go back to following her visit, and whether she has overstayed or had visa issues in the past, before deciding to approve her visa.

As PP have said, I think this is a non-starter and that you should focus on your exit plan, rather than trying to thwart your MILs stay in the UK.

UKVI will have made checks to see that your MIL has a job/family/assets to go back to following her visit, and whether she has overstayed or had visa issues in the past, before deciding to approve her visa.

Yes, if she has a life in another country then it's assumed she's going to go home. If she arrives with a bag of spanners, a CV and a pile of cash from selling her house then immigration might think she's going to overstay.

Are you the same poster who's MIL asked her to hand over your passports so she could 'keep them safe'?

lol, won't happen. she is almost 80 and only has DH in the UK. no family back home. but visa has been granted as she always went back home. H threatened me the other day to throw me out and move her in permanently (i.e. not going back). But there will be nothing suspicious per se if she comes along.

you are all right, I need to focus on the bigger problem and that isn't mil. I think I needed to hear this. Thank you.

Focus on you & your children right now.

Call womens aid. Injections can be sort to remove your husband from the family home. You need support to guide you through all the processes, let them carry some of the load you face.

https://www.gov.uk/injunction-domestic-violence info on removing your husband from the property.

Make sure you have the children's passports, if he has them you can cancel them if you have a fear he would try to remove them.

Keep important documents like ID, marriage certificate, bank info & other papers if possible. It's possible to get replacements but this is easier this way.
If you have any evidence of abuse of any type, gather that too, it can be used if required.

Oh, & well done for taking this step, it's hard, I know, but there is a better life out there.

Good luck.

Soon-to-be ex-H has tipped his hand here. In some ways he has done you a favour, instead of taking the kids back to his home country, which would be a nightmare to extradite.

1. Ignore the MiL threat. Let her come. She's 80!
   Would she really want to step into endless childcare responsibilities for disabled DC at that age? Don't lift a finger to help her when she is here beyond basic civility.

2. Get good advice. Women's Aid, solicitors and police if there is financial coercion and domestic abuse.

3. Work out how to survive without DHs income. CMS is crap in this country and men have been known to withhold/stop payments as a way to keep control.

Good luck.

I would like to point out that, in the UK, women have rights. It's not as simple as him chucking you out and that be that. Please don't let him make you feel this threatened. When my DH argues with me (also Middle Eastern) he says some nonsense stuff like I would just be kicked out and left to it - because he's the man and seemingly do not have to abide by rules. I always remind him, this is the UK, it is not a male dominated say-so so good luck. He also says how his non-English speaking parents would raise our children too - i just laugh because it's absolute nonsense! It's often because men from these countries believe they have the power over women, and think that is the same here 🙄. It does sound to me however that you really are genuinely scared by your Husband however 😔 please call your local women's aid/shelter for advice.

If you have a basis to think that she would not be returning at the end of her visit visa then you can report it here: https://www.gov.uk/report-immigration-crime

Hollow laugh to those who think UKVI would be too kind to do anything about an 80 year old visitor on the say so of an estranged wife. They would take it very seriously, assuming that they actually got to it in time, which is by no means a given. You can also contact the issuing entry clearance post to inform them that her circumstances have changed (from intending to return to having no intention to return). If she is genuinely visiting it would be a shitty thing to do, but if she is colluding with her abusive son to squeeze you out then perfectly legitimate.

As others have said, you may want to prioritise the separation. Not my area but as I understand it you can apply for an occupation order if he has been abusive, you have children with disabilities and want to stay in the home and get him to leave. Does he have anywhere else to go? That would be relevant. It would be a good idea to look for legal support if you can.

No, that MIL was Croatian.

no idea who that is but it wasn't me. I am in the UK and MIL is on her home country. I wouldn't take the DC there in any case.

As long as you follow the advice given here regarding the domestic abuse you are suffering whilst caring for your children you will be fine.

The 'immigration' issue is too much of a 'hotbed' right now so just do what the other women in the UK do to escape.

I would not worry too much about MIL overstaying her visa but focus your attention preventing your husband from legally taking your children out of the country. Keep their passports safe and seek legal advise immediately.

Contact women's aid or similar for advice. How long is he due to be out of the country? Do not let him take any of the children, and ensure all passports are hidden, ideally elsewhere!

You own half the house so you do not need to leave

All of the advice given is great. Give someone else your children's passports to mind. Take legal advice. Speak to women's aid. Make sure you have copies of your mortgage statements (with your name on), your financial stuff, your own documents.

The next time he says he's going to throw you out I'd be tempted to say "actually I'm planning on throwing YOU out and having MY mother come and help me"

Is he abusive at all - financially or coercively?