Annoyed with my DH

[Rorous]

My husband and I are receiving guests tomorrow so downstairs in our house needed a good clean. Originally, he was going to take our DC out so I could get things done. My friend then asked if I was free, so my husband suggested I go and meet my friend with our DC and he would get the cleaning done. I’ve come home 2.5hrs later and all he has done is clean a room that I had tidied earlier in the day, and start to cook dinner … although very grateful for this, what?! 2.5hrs!!! So at 8pm I was still rushing around cleaning after putting our DC to bed and walking the dog (note he was cleaning in this time too). I would rather have just stayed home and done it myself.

AIBU to be annoyed?

Then you should have just stayed home and gone out after. I doubt your guests will even notice anyway.

Yes, wish I had!

My Dh claims he ‘doesn’t see dirt’ as I wipe down the counters/hob after he’s made a sandwich (possibly emptied the bread bun bag over the hob, who knows?) I don’t remember the last time he picked up the hoover. Can’t really complain given he does 90% of the cooking/sorts all the finances/bills/takes my car to the garage or does repairs himself etc. I’m just astounded that he honestly doesn’t see stuff that needs doing.

Are you surprised? Would he normally have cleaned the downstairs to a good standard in a couple of hours?

Yes I think I’d have to bite my tongue too! He sounds very helpful in other ways :)

You're not unreasonable to be annoyed but it was entirely predictable.

If that was in my house the entire 2.5 hours would have been spent cleaning out the shed or some other area that no guest would ever set foot in.

Top of the kitchen cupboards.

I can’t remember the last time he cleaned downstairs!

My dh is superficially neat and tidy. However when I go in the bathroom after he’s had a shower although he’s squeegeed the doors to stop limescale the shower tray will be grimy and the basin is covered in toothpaste.
He loads the dishwasher but never wipes the worktops.
He’ll tidy a room but never clean skirtings or picture frames.
He really doesn’t see dirt.

This made me laugh!

My friend’s dh always washes the car when they’re about to go on holiday.
Doesn’t matter about packing, sorting the house or anything else, he just washes the car.

I really can't whinge. I had a flat tyre when he had just come out of A&E, lent me his car (so he had to walk a fair bit to take out the dogs) and got my tyre replaced by the time I got home from work. He fitted our kitchen (he is not a kitchen fitter!) He organised everything for our road trips around America (loads), booked taxis, flights, hotels. He is brilliant!

I’d have to be really specific if I wanted dh to clean to the same standards as me. He just doesn’t care basically. He would probably hoover and give the sides a quick wipe but that would be it. He just wouldn’t “see” the things I would in terms of what would need doing.

I don't think I've ever known a man to clean the top of a kitchen cupboard 🤣