Can you help talk sense into me- health anxiety worries

[limom]

I feel like I've been stressing out for weeks now about my health.

I had some stomach pains and convinced myself I had pancreatic cancer or something. I went to see a private specialist because the GP didn't take it very seriously and had an ultrasound and and MRI scan. Ultrasound was fine and now I'm waiting on the results of the MRI. I thought about it every day for about a month with varying degrees of anxiety. My stomach hasn't really been hurting and I think I'm probably ok.

I had to have a blood test for something unrelated, as I take regular medication and it showed I have low folate. I found out yesterday I need supplements, fine. It happens but I am surprised. I've really had to stop myself googling low folate and cancer being linked or a cause.

Then last nigh I was scratching my arm and noticed I have a small lump under the skin on my forearm. Now I'm just stressing out about that. I know I have to get the doc to look at it on Monday and the most likely thing will be that I'll need a scan etc and I just know it's going to drag on and I can't stop thinking that it's something sinister and I won't see my kids grow up.

I just can't deal with this and feel constantly sad and worried. It's been a good 4-5 weeks since I've started to feel like this and I'm just terrified and it's really taking away my enjoyment of life.

How can I help myself deal with this anxiety around my health ? I'm just so afraid I won't see my kids grow up. Thank you.

Glad everything is normal. You don’t have any worrying symptoms or any reason to think you’re unwell. Check with your doctor, you should be able to self refer for CBT.

Thanks so much for your comment.

Thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences with this problem.

The kids are just so tiny and they need me so much ! When I go somewhere at all, it's like the end of the world for them. I am definitely the main person who cares for them. My husband is always working. I've had to take some work trips and they were so upset by my absence. They're so clingy. Anyway, thanks for confirming that this is very common for parents of very young children. My husband also smokes like a chimney and I get so so angry about it. If I get sick and he also gets sick then it's just tragic.

I don't drink at all. I am trying to be extremely healthy to stick around.

It's funny you mention MS, because I actually have that ! I've had it for around 8 years but don't have any major obvious signs of it yet. In the sense that my mobility is absolutely fine etc.

My husband keeps saying, worry about your MS and not other random stuff. But I don't worry about my MS, it's very unlikely to kill me. I would rather be in a wheelchair than dead.

I just want to add that I was also recently diagnosed with low folate and am taking the high dose supplements. I hadn't realised how badly the deficiency had affected my mood. You may start to feel better once you've been taking the tablets for a few weeks.

Thank you. I'm not sure if I'm on the high dose supplements - it says 5 mg? No one talked to me about it at all. I just got a text after my blood tests, saying I need to pick up a prescription because I've got low folate.

Stomach pains can be caused by anxiety, which is what you have. You can just take folic acid vitamins (and medicine for anxiety). How old are your children? You might think they won't notice, but they usually do notice when a parent is anxious and you don't want this to rub off on them.

They're 2 and 4.

Well this is how it went. I had a few bouts of vomiting and stomach aches when my kids were also sick with stomach bugs, but mine just kept coming back.

The GP said it shouldn't be an issue as it just sounded like I was more run down and it hit me harder. Then I saw the specialist who started talking about MRI scans and I completely freaked out after that and had a weird gnawing pain there since my anxiety rocketed about it. I spent weeks trying to work out if I was actually in pain or if I was just anxious.

I was just about to share that exact advice!! The anxiety guy is great.

I have his book on audible and have listened so many times, now his voice just calms me down.

Op I have health anxiety after watching my father pass away, it's good if you can work out when yours started? Or the why.

@startstopengine thank you for sharing.

The first time it started I was 19, when my grandma passed away. I kept getting feelings of anxiety, like feeling like I couldn't take a deep breath. It started after I spent the week after my grandma passed with my aunt and we would go and visit relatives and she recounted the story over and over and over. Through one of the times she told the story, I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe properly. I had no idea what it was and started to worry I was going to die. I went to the doctor who said it does sound like anxiety. Then the anxious thoughts shifted from myself, to my family members. Perhaps they'd die soon from cancer etc. that's the first time I was anxious and worried about my health and other people's health.

It's come and gone to varying degrees since then, but probably most extreme now.

I watch a lot of medical stuff in order to ' catch symptoms ' and gain knowledge. I used to watch a lot about cancer specifically but I've stopped, as it's just too much.

So you know the googling and checking makes it worse. The anxiety guy in his book and on YouTube talks you done from doing this.

He has some stories of his experiences and it's so similar and familiar you don't feel so alone you feel like someone finally understands.

I tried a few things and therapy, etc but one lady I think she was like NLP tried to make me lie down and relax and the whole time I was "I can't breathe" the panic was awful so I relaxed I'd have to work through this myself.

I've managed with YouTube and the book to go from a 9-10 panic level actually taking myself to a&e to about a 3-4 level.

I still check sometimes, I have days where I'm worried but not panic.

A big part of mine tied in with peri menopause - I had the perfect storm of covid happening, my dad dying and turning 47 wham all the symptoms on top of grief and I think it just spiralled from there.

I had a scan today in my arm and it turns out it's just a lipoma, thankfully.

Hi OP, I’ve been through this. Please feel free to message if you need some advice! X

Exactly this.

I already had cPTSD. This originally related to a history of trauma and abuse, and EMDR proved a highly effective treatment. In fact, I thought I was about as 'cured' as it was possible to be. The difference here is that mind's responses to trauma are so deep-rooted and so well-practiced in denial/shutting out/ compartmentalising that I now know I process traumatic events in a very different way to 'normal'. I was warned at the time that any new trauma subsequent to my previous therapy might need re-treating in the future.

That has now happened. I do have unresolved issues from the sudden death of my mother at a young age from a very aggressive tumour. Her illness ran its course across only a few weeks, and this left me fearful of possibly suffering the same fate. (I'm now near to the age she was when she died). More recently I sustained a serious injury and post-surgery developed DVT and two massive pulmonary emboli. I could well have died. Mere months later my DH was diagnosed with cancer.

As a likely result of these experiences my health anxiety is through the roof. I grow terrified whenever I find marks on my skin, and whenever this year I've gone to my GP to discuss a health-issue I ended up a crying, gibbering wreck. A recent cervical screening test was a horrible, traumatising experience. I've had umpteen of these in my lifetime and never until now viewed them as anything other than routine. I also started experiencing flashbacks and horrible dreams again.

The weird thing is that I know this is neurotic, but that objective knowledge doesn't make my fears seem any less real. I went back to the mental health team in January - there's a lengthy waiting list - but have just a few weeks ago started with EMDR again. IME, it's worth sticking out for the treatment that will help - CBT for me doesn't touch these issues.

EMDR worked almost like a miracle for me before: totally changed my outlook on life and enabled an objectivity I never dreamed was possible. I don't know yet whether this will be successful as therapy is still ongoing, but if this form of therapy could unpick my previous very serious traumas, I have every confidence it will help again.

Commiserations, OP. I can fully emphathise with how you feel.

@SerafinasGoose god that sounds awful and almost would put anyone into a state of panic.

Thanks for sharing what works, I may look into that therapy as well as trying to fix myself.

I have health anxiety, which tends to be low level for a while and then suddenly flare up for a couple of months, generally triggered by some actual (minor but genuine) health issue.

Mumsnet has been a godsend - there are loads of threads discussing e.g. all the physical symptoms that anxiety can cause, or how to deal with HA.

In my case my iron levels tend to run quite low - that in itself causes a horrible mix of weird physical symptoms - generally run down, heart palpitations, tingling hands and feet... along with increased general anxiety, which is then a vicious circle.

I've had every test under the sun, for all sorts of strange and alarming symptoms, and nothing is ever wrong with me. Nothing at all. Low iron is the only thing that ever shows up. They've checked me quite thoroughly and invasively for any sinister reasons for the low iron and it's just a combo of being veggie and menstruation.

It sounds like yours could definitely be exacerbated by low folate - as that is the only thing the doctor has actually found wrong with you, hopefully after a few weeks/months of treatment to correct the deficiency you will feel much better.

I had a free NHS course of CBT a few years ago - it was surprisingly helpful. Definitely recommend trying CBT too if you haven't before.