To ask my husband to get teeth whitening

[epmemcs1967]

I’m expecting hate for this but I can’t seem to get past the issue.
I love my DH very much but I have an issue with his teeth. He’s always had ‘wonky’ teeth and that’s never bothered me but I’ve noticed that they are becoming increasingly yellow. It’s not that he doesn’t take good care of them but rather he drinks things that are staining them like red wine and black coffee etc.
The issue started when I was pregnant with our DC and was one of the many random things that would gross me out. I hoped it would pass with time but it’s been several months since our DC has arrived and it’s getting worse. I’ve also tried explaining that the things he is doing are bad for his teeth and have dropped hints about getting our teeth whitened to no avail.
I would also like to add that we’re not particularly vain people, we like to look good for special occasions and look professional for work etc but don’t go out of our way for extra beauty treatments unless it’s a special occasion.
I’m finding him really unattractive because of it and find kissing him and being intimate off putting. How can I overcome this or convince him to do something about it himself?

Yanbu teeth are everything bad teeth make me ill

If it’s just staining and not enamel wear he doesn’t need teeth whitening - a cleaning with a hygienist will make a massive difference :)

If he drinks coffee and red wine then they’ll just discolour again within months, so unless you’ve got the money to being doing this repeatedly for the rest of his life, you need to get used to it or get divorced.

If they’re clean and he has good oral hygiene generally, not wanting to kiss or have sex with him because of discoloured enamel seems extreme. Perhaps it’s indicative of other more serious problems in your marriage that need to be worked on?

You can suggest it but he might not agree. Is it the kind of thing he’d normally do? I think if you feel strongly you can bring it up directly, but accept his response if he doesn’t want to. Also I guess be prepared for him to comment on your appearance.

If he gets them whitened he'll just stain them again. He needs a good clean from a hygienist and perhaps a whitening toothpaste and an electric toothbrush.

Don’t be alarmed. This happened me with my husband after every single baby (x3) where I HATED his nose. After the breastfeeding and year had passed he turns me on more than ever

this too shall pass

I find wonky, gapped and/or yellow teeth a massive distraction when talking to someone. Same as if they had a hairy mole or other distracting feature on their face. I try not to look and try to concentrate on what they are saying, but I find my eyes keep moving back to it. I have no advice OP, but teeth can be very distracting as this advert showed:
https://theadvertseeker.wordpress.com/2014/09/04/colgate/

Yes I would be honest. If it was the other way round you’d want him to be honest with you wouldn’t you? I’d be as gentle as possible but I think sometimes in marriage you have to have tricky conversations.

Its also a problem that’s probably easy to fix and there’s quite a lot of research about the wider health benefits of good oral hygiene.

JC03745 genius advert !

Sounds like he just needs to see the hygienist (which I’m sure most people do every now and again). I’d be really offended if my husband asked me to get my teeth whitened.

I’d want to know, but he may come back with something he’d like you to have done- be prepared! If that’s going to offend you don’t say anything.

Buy a whitening toothpaste and it should work and he won't even realise?