AIBU automatic cars are easier?

[FondOfOwls]

I've been toying with an idea of getting an automatic car, when we swap our car soon. I was surprised how polarising this seems to be!
I am not a keen driver, in fact I dislike driving. I have an old manual car that makes do, but I never really got 'used to' it. I guess I just don't drive enough. I am finding it a massive pain in the arse trying to concentrate on the road, constantly changing gears in heavy traffic and trying to make sure my kids don't kill each other in the back seats.

I though getting an auto will be a way to make driving easier, DH wants to test drive one too. However DFIL, neighbours and some other people seem to think that I will be speeding in an auto (as you don't have to manually change gears) and get careless? I don't speed and we live in a heavy traffic area with roundabouts stacked on top of each other.

Apparently it's all due to my lack of experience in driving and I was told I just have to keep practising, drive every day to get used to it etc. AIBU to think I don't NEED to do that, as I don't really care to drive a manual?!
I chatted to some friends who drive autos and they love them.

YABU manual driving is a skill and getting an auto is lazy
YANBU if you don't love driving, there's no point sticking with manual for the sake of it!

Thanks, your comparison really cracked me up 😂

Sorry, I don't follow your logic. You say your neighbour either didn't put it into park or didn't apply hand break and in the same sentence you say that either and both things can fail. So what do you suggest I do when parking? Put it into an imaginary gear?
I would assume many things can fail in a manual car when parking also. Cars are not infallible, full stop.

Under the grill or on a griddle.

Hence the importance of turning the wheel when parked on a steep slope! Whether it's manual or automatic. It's a good precaution if something else fails.

I never had a problem with manual. But now I've gone to auto, I'll never go back.

I'd be happy to drive a manual on holiday or someone else's of course. These are good reasons to hold a manual licence.

Your Fil is either jealous, or hanging on to some sort of snobbery.

His points certainly aren't valid. There used to be the view that autos weren't as reliable/more expensive to repair. I've no idea if this is still true.

Since 1990 I have only ever driven automatic cars both here and in the USA. I cannot understand this idiotic passion for manual transmission.

Our everyday cars are both automatic, but DH's Landy and beloved Lotus both have manual gear changes. The fun begins with the manuals when we forget to depress the clutch to change down and almost stall.

Automatics all the way for me. So easy.

I find them much better for city driving where you are constantly stuck in traffic.

I think from your post an auto will be perfect for your needs.

Driving an auto won’t make you lazy or speed. If you are a safe driver you will automatically be aware of the speed you are driving. Remember you still have control over the accelerator and you’ll know if you are pressing it too much to go faster.

I teach driving in a manual car because I like teaching young people who “mostly” prefer manual.

I personally never got on with an automatic car but that’s just me.

YANBU

Your DFIL and the other people you're listening to are dinosaurs and their opinions are wrong. All you have to do to check your speed is watch your speedometer and get used to the sound of your engine. If you're a careful manual driver, you'll also be a careful driver in an automatic. Where I live, I'd be far more worried about boy racers in manual shift vehicles who think they're Nascar material than people in automatic cars.

I learned to drive in a stick and changed to automatic when I had three DCs and spent a lot of my time driving in a very built-up area. The constant gear changes and the refereeing of squabbles in the back seat made driving a manual downright stressful, if not outright dangerous. Plus, we get snow and icy conditions here in the winter. I have never looked back.

Make the change. You won't regret it.

We changed to get an automatic when we first got a family car when ds1 came along - completely love it and 20 yrs on I wouldn't go back to manual. We used to live in a bit of London that meant going through very steep hills and tricky bits and it was so nice to not have to worry about gears on top of everything else.

These days we have updated the cars and while mine is still automatic, dh switched his to a manual so that ds1 could learn to drive in a manual. We figured that he is very good at physical type things so it would be an advantage to him to know how to drive a manual - he ended up learning to drive far more quickly than even his instructor expected as he has ridiculously good coordination and it all came easily to him.

DS2 on the other hand is dyspraxic and still hasn't learnt to ride a bike; if when he is old enough he would like to learn to drive I really hope that he learns on an automatic - I suspect he will find a manual all too stressful...

I tried to persuade my sis to switch to an automatic as it made driving life so much easier but her wretched 'd'h insisted that he didn't' want to be switching between manual and automatic, it wasn't fair so she mustn't. In the end for some reason he ended up with a forced car change that involved a switch to auto and he liked it so much that she was then 'allowed' to change to automatic - and no surprise - she loved it too. but she endured at least 15 years extra driving a manual when she would have been much better off in an automatic due to a medical condition - so glad that he is a now STBXH :). But also can't believe that he thought he had the right to control the choice of her day to day car (which he wouldn't drive very often at all) to the detriment of her health. Actually I can - he is completely controlling and likes to think he knows best about everything even when he doesn't!

It's bullshit. Driving an auto is ace and I'd never go back to manual. Fucking ignore the busybodies.

Electric cars don't have gears, so are not "automatic" as such. But they don't have gears.
We'll all be driving gearless (as opposed to automatic) cars soon. How will your ILs feel about that?

My DH is a taxi driver who has been driving for yonks - over 30 years now. Learnt to drive in a standard car but in the last few years, has been driving an automatic. He said he wouldn't go back.
My DD has recently failed her driving test. By her own admission, she'd say she's not a natural driver. She constantly says that there's just too much to look at and think about whilst having to change gears! I'd really like her to go down the automatic route now but driving lessons for them are so expensive!

The kids killing each other in the back seats has no relevance to an automatic or a manual. If you find it hard to coordinate a busy road and gears it sounds like you're inexperienced and lack the confidence needed to be a good careful alert driver.

Who cares honestly? If it suits you better, drive an auto. It doesn’t matter! I drove a manual from 17 to 30 and have just bought an auto because my knees are beyond fucked and it’s just easier.

I'll never ever go back to a manual and I was SO snooty about them before!

The gear boxes these days are amazing - they change gear when they're supposed to unlike older ones!

I think you either love them or you hate them.

I had one as a courtesy car and hated it - compounded by an incident where I went to press the non-existent clutch, hit the side of the brake pedal and did an emergency stop at 40mph.

You sound just like me. I hated driving until I got an auto and now I love it. You don't need lessons.

I like yourself op don't feel like driving comes naturally to me. I passed my test a bit later at 35 and always hated it, always felt I struggled with the gears. Got an electric Corsa 2 years ago and it's quite literally changed my life. I can actually say I like driving now, just do it you won't regret it.

Automatic is the way forward.

I do find it hard to coordinate gear changes, heavy traffic and a child screaming for 20 minutes non stop, because she's 2 and doesn't like to be in the car, with the other child crying because her sister is screaming!
I do think taking one thing out of the equation would make it easier.
I'm ok driving my manual without the kids, but unfortunately I can't just leave them at home most of the time 😝