To be concerned that my ex is lying about co-habiting?

[ThisLife2024]

Getting through a divorce, almost 3 years now since we split. He has put on the divorce papers that he is not co-habiting and put his parents’ down as his address. I know he stays there on Saturdays as that’s where he has our kids over. All fine with that.

But for over 18 months now (maybe longer) he has been dating his girlfriend and stays at her house “most” nights. I got this info from his sister. The kids have never been to his GFs house inside, just to drop her off.

He claims this is not Co-habiting as he still has stuff at his mum’s and stays there “a few” nights a week (I hear 2/3 max from his sister).

It’s worrying that he has lied on the form and I have told his solicitor to have a conversation about it. He denies lying and says he can stay at GF’s six nights a week some weeks and it’s still not cohabiting as he has no claim on the property.

This is so annoying and I can’t sign a form I know he has lied on. I didn’t have my own solicitor before but now think I need one. Anyone else been in this weird situation?!

where does he pay rent/bills/council tax, where does his mail go, his bank statements, etc, where does he vote?

Why does it matter to you how many nights he spends at his girlfriends?

It matters because he is suggesting that he's effectively homeless and staying at his parents. This means he can claim that his needs are not met. If he is living with her, that changes things. Also the partner will be expected to disclose. It sounds to me like he is being disingenuous. OP, you can put in your statement that you believe your ex is cohabitating. It will then be up to the judge what he does with this information.

I honestly don’t think he pays rent to anyone. He won’t tell me. He was always very secretive about his finances. It matters if he is lying on the form as it’s a court document. It should matter to him more than me I suppose as he could be committing perjury!

Do you jointly own a property?

OP have you both filled in a Form E?

We have settled on the house, I bought him out so he is off the deeds. All amicable. He pays child maintenance.

If you've already reached a financial settlement then really why does it matter? If he's at his parents 2-3 nights a week then he doesn't live with his girlfriend either really.

D81 as we are agreed on the finances. It’s a “Statement of information for a consent order in relation to a financial remedy” form.

Why do you care op? It's none of your business.

This is what I am worried about. I earn more than him (almost double) and am concerned he might have to pay less in maintenance or something down the line. I am not clued up on this at all! Or maybe he could have a claim on the house even. We have almost identical amounts in assets. My outgoings are just a lot higher.

If he officially moved in, he'd pay less because of them.

Child maintenance is a flat percentage of his earnings. It will only go down if he has a child, lives with someone who has a child or his salary decreases (including redundancy ) .

If in doubt, seek legal advice. Don't sign documents that you think may be incorrect. A solicitor will be able to advise you on the best course of action. I doubt it will cost much, as it's probably straight forward either sign or not.

If financial orders are completed, where he lives will have no bearing on child support. If he's not financially contributing to his girlfriend's house then it's not his house. I don't see since the house had already settled, what's the problem with signing it from your side

Op, if you've completed the financials, I don't think it matters where he's living. If this is just for the divorce, then get it over with I say. When you posted I thought you were at the start of ancillary relief proceedings.

Well even if he is lying there's not much you can do about it. You can sign it. You just don't want to rightly or wrongly.