Not to bring a child into this world

[Nobodyknowsitall5]

I'm due to start ivf again after a number of failed attempts. I'm honestly starting to think that I shouldn't bother because the world is becoming such a shit hole, that it would be unfair on the child (if the ivf worked). I'm probably being aibu but the incident in southport is just so appalling, and I'm wondering if I'm being selfish by pushing something that nature isn't really on my side with.

The incident in Southport is so incredibly rare and unlikely that you are being unreasonable for making it a reason that it would be unfair to bring a child into the world. The vast majority of children will never experience anything like that.

Why not think about the billions of people who, day in and day out, have rather ordinary or even pleasant days where nothing remotely awful happens at all?

Even adding up all the shit that's happening globally it doesn't reflect in any way the lives of the vast, peaceful, majority.

Stop watching or reading the news and drop out of SM for a while to recalibrate a sense of proportion.

This is really helpful and good to hear. Just feeling very blue about it all at the minute. Like it all just feels very pointless. You are right though, if only the media showed us all the good and positive happenings in the world.

It's up to you, ultimately. The decision to go through IVF isn't easy, particularly after a number of previous attempts. There are people who make the decision to be childfree at least in part due to global/environmental concerns, so it is a consideration. But equally it's normal to feel miserable in your situation, maybe you're just having a down day.

This is the single best time to be alive, of all human history, for everyone except monarchs. We just read too much about it all. I’ve decided only to look at the news once a day like it used to be and am much happier. However, IVF isn’t easy and I’m sorry you’re having a low moment

Child mortality is currently the lowest it’s ever been in human history.

This is a horrendous tragedy but you are shocked because it’s rare, 70 years ago nearly 30% of all kids would die before adulthood

In 1954?! That's just not true.

Here is the 6 o'clock news.
95% of the world's population had an OK day, nothing terrible happened to them and a lot of people report that friends, family, neighbours and even random strangers helped them out.

Now over to the weather.

In 1950 the global infant mortality rate was 27%

It was lower in the U.K. but foreign children dying is just as awful

YABU to make that your reason. The world is a safer place to live in than it ever has been, especially if you live in a relatively wealthy, stable country. Basing your judgements about safety on isolated, rare incidents (however awful) is bonkers. You're millions of times more likely to be seriously harmed by falling down the stairs or crossing the road or something.

Bad things happen. They always have and they always will. I remember Dunblane happening (I was a young teen). It was awful. But I don't think the people born after it shouldn't have been because the world was so terrible. It was a terrible thing. As was the tragedy yesterday.
Obviously though IVF is an ordeal and I've been going through it myself over the past couple of years (mid round 3rd time currently.) and sometimes you need to tell yourself reasons why being a parent might not be a good idea. And that's fine. I do the same.

Appalling things happen every day ,history is full of appalling events
But most of us plod along quite happily for large periods of time .

Thank you all. Your responses are helping me from going down a daft rabbit hole :)

In the UK it was about 10 times lower.

Of course you shouldn't stop trying to have a child! Of course what's happened is horrific, but fortunately things like this are rare. Bad things happen, some very bad, and that's always been how it is. If people had stopped having children because a few bad things happened that week, the human race would have disappeared 1000s of years ago!

I even remember my nan saying 'this is no world to bring a child into' in the 1970s with conflict in Northern Ireland, and the threat of Nuclear war, and severe economic recession, and 3 million on the dole et al. But here we are 45-50 years later, still alive and kicking, and still having children, because that's what we do. It's ridiculously dramatic to say 'this is no world to bring children into.' It's no worse than it's always been (and in some ways it's better.)

You don’t need a reason to have or not have children. But catastrophising about how bad the world is shouldn’t be part of the rationale. We live in a relatively affluent, safe country. Good things happen every day. If you go down the route of saying the world is a terrible place so you’re not going to have kids, it’s not far from there to just giving up entirely. Every era has people who thinks they’re living in the end times - we’re not unique!

I’m not one for all that toxic positivity, gratitude nonsense but day to day life for many is really not all that bad! There’s plenty of enjoyment to be had.

This. Ordinary people have lives that are unimaginably better than even 3-4 generations ago. The UK is (mostly) a better and safer place than it was. Don't forget, these stories are in the news because they are Rare!