To be genuinely scared of the world we live in

[pinklite]

Apologies if there has already been a similar thread today but just wanted to air my feelings.

Today's attack in Southport is just horrific and keeps playing on my mind. A very similar incident occurred in my home town a few years ago on a park where a little girl was stabbed and killed.

I'm genuinely scared for my two young sons to grow up in this world where there are complete maniacs who want to harm young children. I'm a naturally anxious person anyway and have been since childhood, so anytime we go anywhere I'm on high alert of the people around us and our surroundings.

I know we can't live in fear, but how can we not when things like this seem to be a regular occurrence?

It's absolutely horrible but thankfully not a regular occurrence by any means. The chances of this happening to your nearest and dearest are minute. It's really important to remember that most violence takes place in the home by perpetrators known to the victims. Attacks by strangers are really incredibly rare, which is why they make the news.

I feel exactly the same way OP.

100 years ago, we would not have known about these tragedies unless they were huge enough to make national newspapers or happened locally. We know about more bad events now because of the internet.

Maintaining high levels of situational awareness outside your home is IMO a good thing.

It’s shocking and unnerving precisely because it’s not a regular occurrence. As a general trend, humans are becoming less violent but it’s natural and understandable to be deeply shaken when something so awful happens.

I feel the same. I don't know how to protect my children from the world anymore. I've always believed in the goodness in people but it's becoming harder to have faith that the majority of people are good people.

100 years ago you or your child could easily die in childbirth.

Then they had to survive until adult hood without dying of what are today treatable or even preventable illness.

Violent crime was common. And you weren't going to get effective hospital treatment for any injuries.

You wouldn't have known much about what was happening around the world as communications were slow.

It is a much much safer world now than it was.

It is horrific, but I agree with the PP this isn't a regular occurrence, at all. Think about how many children's activities happen up and down the country every single day with nothing bad hapenning. You need to put risk into perspective, everything we do (or don't do) carries a smaller or larger risk. It's just for a lot of things we don't think about it. You also have to balance up how much enjoyment activities bring relative to the absolutely minute risk of something bad hapenning.

I also don't know if the frequency of these horrific events are increasing in the UK, today I was thinking about Dunblane and that was 25-30 years ago.

This is a very uncommon occurrence. Don't watch the news and cut down on social media. Being shaken is one thing, but being anxious every time you leave the house will ruin your lives and the lives of your children.

I agree. We know we can put it into perspective of how many activities happen without even but today is still utterly shocking and horrific. It's quite difficult today as mum of a daughter to not draw parallels with the Manchester attacks at an Arianna Grande concert. Plus, the several attacks in the past few years on children by someone mentally ill.

I'm very relaxed as a parent and we are lucky that our kids can have lots of freedoms but today's attack has shocked me to the core. What needs to happen so kids can be safe?

When I meant regular occurrence, I didn't mean specifically against children in general, I just meant that knife crime is rife. There is no denying that. I have had a family member who was murdered by two boys armed with knives so I know that first hand

Statistically the world is no more violent now than 10/20/50 years ago in terms of rare crime like that (world war stats are different)

no, I don’t feel genuinely scared of the world. It has its flaws but it’s pretty awesome. Even on a small scale of awesome, such as I’ve organised a kids sports camp this week and watching 40 kids working together, try hard, have fun, that brings such joy. There’s loads of reasons for optimism, you don’t have to spend your time focussed on the rare negative events.

It's not a regular occurrence OP, if it was, it wouldn't be in the news.

The world is dangerous and always has been. You can't sterilise it. Horrible things used to happen to children in the past too, in fact, many children didn't see past their 2nd birthdays.

I know that sounds awfully harsh and insensitive but it wasn't until I started putting things into perspective like that, that I managed to control my own anxiety.

What has happened to these poor children today is horrific, there's no other word for it, and god help their poor families in trying to deal with it, but it's highly unlikely to happen to you.

It's probably due to the news being 24/7 nowadays that we hear it more. But I've felt more scared about the world in general. All the bad things going on around the world, it was easier to duck my head and feel further away from it. Wars and killing people in the news, I just can't cope with it.

I have to keep myself from reading the news too much as I absorb it too much and end up down a rabbit hole reading too much about it. Don't know if it's because I'm ND, it hurts my head and especially when I can't do anything about it. I get too stressed and mentally involved.

However, there have been 2 instances too close where I live that have been on the news. Big riot and then a shooting. I do feel it so much more in the last few years.

And hearing horrors of this. Remember that awful stabbing of the children in France, was it in a park? I felt horror reading that too. So bloody sad. :-(

No wonder this has hit you so hard. I’m sorry for your loss, I can’t even imagine.

When people say it's unlikely it will happen to you etc, I bet the families of those children also thought that..

The majority of people are good, that's why they don't make the news.
The people that tried to help today were amazing from what I saw on the news, there's more good than bad

I agree OP, it is going to have brought back some horrible memories and feelings for you.

With your update I can see why it hits home for you. However, life can't be lived in a state of high anxiety. You can avoid certain things but you can't avoid everything.

Stop watching the news. Seriously.

If you left your kids outside your house permanently, it would take more than 10,000 years for them to be abducted, on average.

The stuff on the news is there because the events are so rare.

When you decided to create more humans did you think the world was a safe place and they'd be free from intense suffering? 🤔

The homicide rate in England and Wales has pretty much halved between 2002/3 and 2023/24.

https://www.statista.com/statistics/318385/homicide-rate-england-and-wales/

In 2002/2003 the murder rate was 20 per million population.

In the 1500s it was 20 per 100.000 population.

https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA177954050&sid=googleScholar&v=2.1&it=r&linkaccess=abs&issn=00182753&p=AONE&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7Efa169654&aty=open-web-entry#:~:text=Evidence%20from%20England%20suggests%20that,that%20of%20the%20nineteenth%20century.

In terms of murder rates of the world, the UK is no.142 of a list of 202 countries - where no.1 has the highest murder rate.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Listoffcountriesbyyintentionalhomicidee_rate

We are living in very safe times in a safe country.

Try not to worry.

No they won't have. But as someone who has anxiety and agoraphobia in the past you can't live by the negative what ifs. Anxiety always makes you forget the positive what ifs, which is what happens for the vast majority of times. You don't live or enjoy life if you hide away scared of all the bad things which might possibly occassionally occur.

Obviously OP has a unique case but to answer the question…no, it doesn’t terrify me, the world doesn’t scare me and I don’t fear for my kids. I could get wiped off the road on my way to work by a truck or another driver, or slip and break my neck out running. You can’t live your life petrified of things that are extremely unlikely to happen.

I agree. Was just thinking of this. I also suffer anxiety. I was planning to put my kids in a holiday camp but I am too scared. I know the chance of this happening again are very very low. I feel so bad for the parents, I cannot imagine how they are feeling right now, I would be devastated.

I felt this last year when me and my dd went to watch the local fireworks In town. About 3 hours later a local lad of 18 was stabbed to death in a ridiculous fight that occurred between them and some lads from a different town. The boy who was stabbed to death wasn't some down and out trouble maker, he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It made me feel sick to think that night that lad was watching the same fireworks as us then a few hours later lost his life because some dick head was carrying a knife.