Bf being selfish whilst I’m grieving

[Jellyfishy20]

My great grandmother died yesterday and I am estranged from my family and found out due to social media, I’ve felt betrayed and heartbroken since finding out the news and felt ignored by my boyfriend. I had plans to go out today with a friend and my boyfriend would go to his mums but I just feel drained and not up for it, so I told him I’m not going today and he has kicked off with me saying “I’m not babysitting you” and saying “you’re selfish” so I’ve got angry with him and told him I want to break up. He’s now on the phone slagging me off to his mum in the other room. I feel so lonely and disappointed, with not having family or barely any friends I expected him to be more caring. Am I being unreasonable for expecting more care?

It's not a waste of 3 years, it's a bargain if it doesn't cause you to waste any more time on this dropkick.

Have a read up about sunk cost fallacy, which appears to be what you're in the middle of now.

It sounds as if you've had a difficult and traumatic time, and it would be so worth you investing in yourself. You are so, so young - please don't make the mistake of believing this is the best your life will be.

Get rid of the unsupportive boyfriend, take stock of your life, education, career, realise you are worthwhile investing in and make the life you want to live. Grab every piece of help and support, every opportunity. And please take some time away from relationships until you get to the stage where you think a prospective partner will be lucky to have you rather than the other way round.

I'm sorry for your loss. Of course YANBU.

My circumstances were the same as yours, care leaver, estranged from family, few friends. I wasted my 20s with a prick like this because I was afraid of being alone, and he ground me down and abused me until I believed I deserved it. Please don't make the same mistake I did. You don't deserve this. Get this man out of your life. Use professional services for emorional support, not horrible men who don't value or respect you.

OP you might feel mentally stronger without him making you feel worse.