To think colleague might be sabotaging me?

[chippyheron]

I really don’t want to think the worst of someone - someone who I thought was my friend.

I’ve not been in my job long (less than a year but a total of 9 years in that company) and it’s been pretty bad and I’m now on a PIP.

Colleague rang me and I told her this happened and she told me to get my CV ready as there’s a good chance I’ll be sacked. She was also heavily trying to push me to getting myself signed off.

For context she recently got herself signed off for a month and I think she felt judged for doing it and it makes me wonder whether she wants me to do this because then it doesn’t look as bad on her.

I wouldn't speak to her about problems & being unwell etc. She could well use it against you. Unless she is your boss she should not be speculating about you needing to find another job & getting CV ready!

Ignore her and don’t reveal information to her

Do you think she's also instrumental in getting you put on the PIP? I'd focus on that and stop involving her!

No. She’s the same level as me and works in a different sub category so we never work directly together.

I spoke to her because I thought she was my friend but believe me even if her intentions are good my mouth is shut.

Thing is I never said I was unwell. Shes just told me to get signed off. But I think she forgets that she moaned to me about how she felt judged by management for getting signed off. So yes sadly I think I think a big part of me believes she was heavily pushing that to benefit her.

FYI - your work colleagues are never your friends. They may be friendly, but it's not the same thing.

I wouldn’t say that. My best friend I met through working together, we haven’t worked together in 4ish years now and still just as close. Also have a handful of other good friends from the same situation.

Well obvs, you don't work together so they are now your friend.

If you still worked together, you would be friendly but not friends.

Doesn't sound like she is trying to sabotage you at all. She sounds like a friend giving her advice. Her ideas differ to yours, you don't have to take her advice

If the company is putting many people from many different departments on PIPs, then it seems to me there could be a problem with senior management. The insecurity, alleged poor performance is a problem with the culture of the organisation. If employees are being managed properly, there shouldn't be a need for staff to take time off to manage stress or for frequent usage of PIPs.

PIPS can be used to push people out, and sometimes they are used to really drill home a message and to focus attention. Regardless of the intention, I think once you put a staff member on a PIP, the relationship is going to sour.

I ve seen very unreasonable use of PIPs.

I think your friend is going through stress and may not currently be in the best position to give advice, her view is distorted, her own situation is clouding her judgment.

Any company handing out PIPs is an uncomfortable one to work for, no harm keeping up to date with other options.

No not at all. That’s a really sad outlook and definitely just your experience - don’t tarnish everyone with your brush.

I do think it’s good advice to not see colleagues as friends, only being real friends once you move on.

stop discussing work with her, it does sound like for whatever reason, she’s giving you bad advice.

That's not sabotage.

That's her suggesting you did what she did and get signed off.

Like any suggestion someone makes, you're entitled to mull it over and come to your own decision.

If I was on a PIP I'd probably get my CV in order too, just incase.

You know best how your company works in terms of PIP outcomes but if you were in the same company as me I’d say she was giving you some sound advice.

In my company if you are on a PIP you are on your way out so getting your CV in order & looking for a new role while signed off is not an abnormal move.

There's not enough information in your post to make an informed decision.

It depends what you're now on pip for - stress/anxiety/something physical.

Is work making you worse? Could see be looking or for you even though she felt judged it doesn't mean it's the wrong thing to do - I don't know many people who don't feel judged by management when they're signed off sick! FFS! My mum felt judged in 2020 when she got covid and legally couldn't leave the house.

I never said it was the wrong thing to do. But management are all men in their 50s that scoffed at the company giving out wellbeing days and said they won’t be doing it.

So there is lots of judgement (very wrongly) from them. I never said I felt ill or stressed and she wasn’t suggesting I get signed off for my health.

I have plenty of work colleagues that are my genuine friends, some spanning over 20 years.
OP she may be trying to help, but if you're uncertain if she's genuine, don't tell her anymore about this

Sorry for me pip means personal independence payments - ie for a disability or illness. But reading other replies I now understand it's something different

I really think you're focusing on the wrong thing here

Why don't you make another thread about why you've been put on a PIP, what outcome you would like and see if anyone has some useful advice for you?

IME a PIP is a way to get rid of someone from a company so actually I'd almost certainly get signed off sick with stress and update my CV and spend time interviewing for new jobs. It's not a groundbreaking plan by any means.

Be wary. Peoples motives for doing things can be complex. Ignore what she’s saying and do what is right for you only.

Rubbish, I’ve some great friends who started as work friends - from past jobs and my current job.