Is it appropriate for sons to share a room

[Roomies888]

More of a wwyd, but hoping to get some good ideas/feedback from here!
Sorry bit long, but didn't want to drip feed.
I have 2 sons, one nearly 13 years (from previous relationship) and a 6 year old with my husband.
We live in a 2 bed house with a largeish double room and a good size single room. We can't afford to move. Our area is very expensive and moving out of the area is not a possibility due to jobs and boys both in schools they love. Even the surrounding areas are just as expensive. We'd have to move out more than 50+ miles to even start being able to afford a 3 bed.
My youngest has had medical needs up until about a year ago requiring supervision and medication at night. He's now stable and not anticipating anymore issues.
My oldest is in the other room. He has also suffered some trauma from his bio father though he hasn't seen him in a couple of years. I can't go into too much detail but he's dealt with it really well and in a good place.

We've been thinking about how to sort the rooms out in the next year. We had thought of moving our oldest into the bigger room to share with the youngest. We could fit a double and wardrobe etc in the smaller room but not much else. But I'm unsure if it is really a good idea having my oldest sharing. Hes always had his own room and is going to need space even more as he gets into teen years. On the flip side, can we really keep sharing with our youngest? Theres only 1 window so a stud wall isn't that practical etc and I dont think a curtain or ikea unit provides enough separation.
We feel a bit stuck!
Do we let the boys share despite the age gap and try with what partition we can?
Keep sharing with youngest because oldest needs his space now?

Thanks for any suggestions!
Edit to add: there's no way of converting the attic, no living space to convert and no room in our small garden for an extension.

She sounds incredibly tolerant!

I grew up in a standard 2 bed terrace. When my brother & I were too old to share they partitioned their larger front double (stud wall?) & put in a narrow window. It was v narrow with just enough room for a bed/dressing table & bookshelf but worked fine.

I shared a bedroom with my two younger sisters. I hated it as a teen. Just the total lack of privacy. I left home as soon as possible.
In my twenties I worked on a cruise ship and had to share a cabin and ensuite with one other girl. It didn't bother me because the cabins were so well set up for privacy. In fact on more than one occasion it was not my cabin mate asleep in the bottom bunk and I was none the wiser at the time.
If they must share, try to ensure as much privacy as possible.

Millions of children share with siblings of different ages. It's not 'inappropriate'. It's pretty normal.

There are some disadvantages - a 13-year-old and a six-year-old would generally have very different bedtimes, for example, so that has to be managed somehow, and you certainly do everything possible to divide the room somehow for privacy, but it's a very normal situation that millions of families manage to navigate with no significant problems.

I don’t think you have an option for them not to share, and I agree it would be better to do it in the bigger room if you can. Try to make the floor space even, but give the older one choice over which side/ which bunk etc. Give them both noise-cancelling headphones and make sure there is space elsewhere for the younger one especially to hang out and be noisy, so that older one can have more time alone if he needs it.

The trauma does make it more difficult. If it was serious it might be best consulting a professional?

In general though same sex children of different ages can share. Bedtime is a bit tricker as I imagine they go to bed at different times and you'll have to work out a way for your older boy not to wake the younger one

Talk to the older one explain you need him to share a room, he might be happy too, if he's not explain he has time to adjust and move the younger child in slowly, I'm in a different situation I have young m&f sharing but we are looking at a curtian divider or bed tents

Do you have any equity in your property?

Could you safely remortgage and extend your current home?

Can you petition the larger room but because of the window issue use a row or two of clear glass tiles at the top so both rooms get some natural light. Alternatively have you looked at the cost of adding a small window?
The other option is look at the price of three bed flats, you might not be able to afford a house but it is possible a flat might be doable.
Obviously nothing terrible will happen if they have to share but I think your 13 year old will be peeved if he has had his own room up to this point and suddenly gets a 6 year old foisted on him. Usually children share when they are younger and start getting their own rooms as they get into their teens.

I think they will be fine to share. At 6 your DC2 will still probably play a lot downstairs, whereas your DC1 will spend more time in the room.

There are lots of really clever things you can do with bunks and room dividers and if they have the bigger room you should have plenty of options. It might end up that your DC1 has more personal space if he is currently in the smaller room.

Perhaps get advice from someone about how best to maximise the space you have. Even if you can’t do a loft conversion I know someone who removed the ceiling to expose the roof beams, which gave her enough extra height in her DD’s room
to add a mezzanine sleeping area. Something like this:

What about something like this in the double room? www.diy.com/ranges/building-ranges/alara

Could you divide your own bedroom into two rooms and the two of you move into the second bedroom? I would do all I could to give the older one their own room. Sharing ok for younger children but not for teens.

It looks as if you could potentially use the room dividers I linked to and make a little room within a room for your youngest in your own bedroom (with curtains to block light) so your eldest could continue to have his own room for a couple of years yet, and maybe then look at other options.

I understand your eldest has had hisown space and now possibly having to share is more of the issue

I'm not sure when having to have your own bedroom became a thing. Obviously as families have become smaller it's easier to achieve but when I was growing up I always shared a room, 3 of us (sisters) with 9yrs between us. We never had an issue but we didn't spend hrs in our rooms as kids do now.
Also made you more considerate to others needs.
I don't think you have much choice really do you? It's probably more unsuitable for your youngest to still be in with you.
We split a large back bedroom with a solid partition and new lighting, radiators etc. Luckily we had 2 windows but people across from us have built the partition across a single window to achieve the same.

What other rooms do you have? Can you partition off a sleeping den for the youngest? It sounds as if your older one will really benefit from having a door to close and space of his own...

As did I, till my sister left home but there were four years between sister and me, 6 between younger brother and me. Just think. A 13 yr old has a later bed time, needs the light on, might play music, practise the guitar (yes, I know about headphones, difficult to practise in the dark though). So if I'd have been sharing with my brother, I'd have struggled even to revise for exams etc.

I wouldn't make the boys share unless I could possibly avoid it. I would seriously look at a room divider or similar.

Nothing to stop an older child practicing his guitar in living room or earlier after school. I'd not let him play the guitar at point younger child was going to bed. Younger DC goes to bed earlier and older DC just gets into bed a couple of hours later when younger son will be fast asleep. I had 8 years between my 2 DS's and had no issues with them sharing a room whatsoever. As adults they are very close today probably because of sharing a room for so many years.

I had a friend in high school who's parents slept in the livingroom, with her and her brother having a bedroom each. The parents bed pulled down from built-in cupboards and you'd never know it was their sleeping space. I'd definitely explore that option before I had a tween sharing my room for the foreseeable future.

I’m glad for them but really struggled to share with my sister. It’s not always a happy situation. Siblings can be very different people.