Sibling spat or abuse

[AbusiveBrother]

I was reading the post about the man who killed his 11 year old sister and it struck a cord.

My brother is 7 years older than me and was often left to babysit me. He used to be quite abusive and would punch me and push me around. One time he got annoyed with me and picked me up by my throat while strangling me. I was always told this was typical sibling behaviour and my own fault for being annoying but it's not, is it? AIBU to think this was NOT normal sibling rivalry? He could have killed me!

Op what you described is completely unacceptable behaviour and if any of the adults were aware at the time it should have been dealt with as a serious issue. There is obviously a difference between the usual siblings spats and abuse. My sisters would shout and scream at me to go away or push me out their rooms if I wouldn't leave but that was it . I would call that the usually (still awful) antics but what you described is not OK. Just wondering... how is his behaviour now? 🤦‍♀️

My friend has children 10 years apart, and they did "fight" despite the age gap, but I dont think what you describe is that.

How is your brother now?

My other brother says he's a narcissist but I've always defended him, he's my older brother and I've always idolised him. But I have started to see that I might not be the awful person I always was led to believe I was, I'm starting to realise that my parents might have been the problem, not me.

No, it is not normal sibling behaviour. That would be things like borrowing things without permission, maybe calling each other names, at the most doing things to annoy each other (not saying any of these things should not be called out, btw, just that this is what I might expect to see sibs doing). What you describe is abuse. And the people excusing it are ridiculous.