Mother stressing me out about the world endingending

[OverAnxious727]

So my mum offered me a bit of money to pay for something. I said I'd prefer she put money in DD9's JISA. She said there's no point in that as she can't access it until she's 18 and the world will have ended by then and we'll all be dead from nuclear war.
I am 37 and trying to save for retirement as well as into DD's JISA.

AIBU to expect to live to retirement and for my investments to mean something in 20 years time? Is there any point saving for my child's future? How do other people feel about how long humanity will continue? I don't know what I would do differently in this case!! I have been thinking about how we might end ourselves as a family should a "Threads" like scenario happen MNHQ redacted

Yanbu to expect to live to retirement. Yabvu to think about "how we might end ourselves as a family".

Your mum needs psychiatric intervention.

I feel sorry for your dd, I really do. I hope not a peep of all this gets to her. Carbon monoxide from car exhaust! Please get a grip of yourself for your daughter's sake

Sounds like an off the cuff comment, I’d ignore and move cash into savings

Ask her does she not remember the Cold War? We didn't all die from nuclear bombs then and its not likely now.

is she always such a doom-monger op?

Has she been like this since the 70s/80s, or is it a recent thing? Seems much more stable now than it did then!

If she’s being serious then she should speak to her doctor for help. Same with you TBH - not sure if it was a (very) bad joke about killing your family.

Take the money and spend it the way she wants. Put as much as you can into your various savings.

If the world ends next week, I promise you won’t regret missing out on a new tv.

If it doesn’t, you’ll badly regret not saving all you can.

People have been predicting erasure of mankind due to nuclear war since nuclear war became a viable threat. We can't live our lives assuming that we won't get to grow old.

I honestly believe that the much greater threat to humanity is global warming, and that THAT will become an existiential threat within ours and our children's lifetimes.

If I were you I'd plan to live, and stop your mother from planting seeds in your head. It won't do either of you any good and it will be even more damaging to your child.

How is your mental health generally?

She probably does, and has absorbed the message that has been whispered ever since - that we have no idea just how close we got to full nuclear war. The world seems pretty unstable right now, with nuclear powers doing a lot of posturing and threatening; I don't think she's being unreasonable to be a bit worried that nuclear war might break out - but she has clearly taken the worries much further than a rational person would.

YABU to put any stock into what she said. I think you need to speak to a therapist as you should anxious and easily swayed. You comment about murder:suicide for your family is unhinged.

I had a talk about this with a friend who went very down this route. Nuclear weapons have strangely kept the peace really, because anyone unleashing them is also unleashing them on themselves too. My Dad was saying when he was a kid the Cuba Crisis meant they were all told they’d be dead by 4, if Russia didn’t back down and end the standoff. He went to school and wondered if he’d last the day, he’s in his late seventies now!

History is the best subject to study if you’re in this state. There’s been crisis after crisis but most people have still lived on and the world has continued to turn. We’re in no different a state, some could argue we’re in a very peaceful time comparatively.

Just take the money and use it to buy her some therapy.

Just take the money she’s offered, use it to pay for whatever it was she offered it for but put that same amount from your savings into your daughter’s JISA.

There are two options here:

1. The world ends and, in that case, who cares what material possessions they had and home improvements they did beforehand;
2. The world doesn’t end and your daughter has a nest egg for her future, you have savings, investments and a pension.

As for killing yourself and your children, please please seek advice from your GP if you’re remotely serious and entertaining these thoughts even fleetingly!

There's a great line in a Bill Bryson book about how as a kid during the Cuban missile crisis he thought they were all about to die, so he ate a dessert pie that was saved for his sister. He said nobody died, although he came closer than most when his sister found out about the pie.

There has been threat of nuclear war since second world war ended, it hasn't happened yet.

It's no use worrying about what ifs the likely will never happen.

You both might want to consider some therapy.

To be pedantic, in the event of nuclear war, or some other human-extinction-level catastrophe, the world won't end, the world will go on just fine, just without humans.

If anything it will be climate change and wet bulb temps that get us….

please don’t joke about ending your family’s life…if you are seriously worried to the extent you are considering methods please seek immediate help.

Bloody hell, I'm fairly anxious as a person, but even I haven't considered how I would kill my kids in the event of a disaster. That's beyond the realms of normal.

I'm mid 40s now and can probably remember at least 20 times the world was definitely going to end in my lifetime, yet here we are.

Just carry on with your plans.

Do consider that your mum's anxiety has clearly passed onto you, do you want to pass these thoughts down to your kids too?