To want to work as little as possible?

[Mumofboys37]

Hi all,

Ive got 3 young DC (7, 5 and 4) and have always been the breadwinner by a long way. Because of a recent payrise my husband and I now earn similar amounts - in the region of £50k each.

I reduced my hours recently to a 4 day week and it’s changed my life but now I’m craving even more time off!! We could definitely affford for me to reduce to 3 days whilst still being comfortable but we have some debts that would then take longer to clear. Also my youngest starts school in September and I feel like I’ll be judged for having 2 days “off” every week whilst they’re there.

I use my day off now to sort the house out, walk our dog and have some down time - AIBU to want to give myself this time? Has anybody been in a similar situation? I feel like now the holidays are here I’m appreciating the child free time I’ve been getting whilst all the kids are at school/preschool!

Also - if you’ve ever worked 3 days what’s your preference - to take mon/Friday off and get the work days over with? Or break up the week?

thanks all!

Yanbu.

Yanbu. I dream of not doing the 9-5 slog... It gives you more time to persue what you enjoy and if you can afford it, why not.

Would your DH not want to reduce to 4 days instead of you going to 3?

I have gone to contracting to work as little as poss for as much pay. Of course YANBU.

My best spilt was Tuesday, Thursday, Friday. Felt better for the business too. I currently do Wednesday- Friday and it seems like a big gap between when I’m there.

I briefly worked three days a week and bloody loved it! Definitely take Monday and Friday off, you get more leave that way ( due to bank holiday pro rata when part time) and when kids are in school inset days are normally a Monday or Friday.

Having more days off than on work is brilliant.

It’s not an option for me now sadly, but I’d do it in a heartbeat if I could.

It will affect your career though, you do miss out on stuff, but if you have no desire to go higher, do it.

You do you!
if you can afford go down to the three days you do that and do not let ANYONE judge you. You are not asking them to pay your bills🤣
i wouldn’t take a Monday off as you might miss bank holidays?? Or maybe it doesn’t work like that.
I would say that if your husband is working full time and you go to three days then you should be responsible for the lions share of running the house.

yanbu

i worked 3 days a week when I returned to work after having dc1. The plan was that I’d go back to full time one they were both at secondary school.

i’m in a job that I love but there are no extra hours available (NHS). Dc2 has just finished year 11 and I’m still going 3 days a week - Tuesday- Thursday which works perfectly with the dc’s weekend sporting commitments, getting everything ready to go and get sorted once we’re back.

I’m lucky but it works perfectly

Oh, and I get my BH pro rata so it generally works in my favour and I get more annual
leave to use as I don’t need to take all of the Monday BH’s and Good Friday off.

Fair question - he works shifts though so the only option would be a 50/50 job share and we couldn’t afford that drop in pay.

I think his shifts are part of the issue though - some weeks I have the kids alone all weekend while he gets 4 weekdays off and I’m definitely jealous of that sometimes 😂

i worked 2 x 12 hour shifts for 15 years when mine were young…..it didn’t have a massive impact on my pension as I’m nhs ….so went back full time for the last 3 years then took my pension at 55….but would likely have impacted my pension if I was younger…..it also meant I didn’t apply for promotions ….only went as high as a band 7 but I’ve no regrets….I worked wed, thurs, fri and Saturday…..then had 10 days off

For me it’s clear debts first - then consider pension implications and if then it still looks good, do go for 3 days. Or for fairness and if you both want to, both partners could go 80%.

Contracting work would be perfect but I worry about security while the kids are still young and we have a large mortgage still - I’m very jealous though!

I do worry about feeling harassed on the Tuesday if I took 4 days off together, I’m currently off on a Wednesday and I don’t feel like it makes much of a difference work wise - I never feel like I’m getting too far behind I sometimes wonder how I filled the 5 days to be honest!

Thank you for this - the bank holiday situation always confuses me when I think about it!

I'd pay debts off first then drop down to 3 days.

I only work one day a week and I don’t give a fuck if people judge me for it. It doesn’t matter what other people think op. If it works for your family then crack on.

I agree with pp that you should sort debts and pensions first though.

I only work Tues - Thurs and have done since DS1 was born. Mine are 6, 4 and almost 2.. I have no intention of going back full time unless we really need the money. We are not rich at all (no holidays abroad since the kids were born, both of our cars are 10 years old, need new carpets etc etc etc) but the time is worth more than the money to us. Admittedly I do have my youngest those days "off" but it's a balance with childcare too.

Or Work the equivalent of 3 days a week but spread it out. Could that be an option?

Have either Monday or Fridays off and the other 4 days as school hours so you can finish at 3pm, do homework / start cooking tea etc

A better option could be working compressed hours. I do this and work my full week over four days. I never ever log on when it’s my day off. I love it.

Might be worth seeing if you could take a short lunch break and fit the four days into three.

If your husband is on board, clear the debts then drop a day.

I worked full time up until 18 months ago when I gave up totally . My quality of life has improved 100% I was barely coping before that and felt like I was drowning. I have a SEN dc so I gave up and claim carers and UC now and I feel like I have my life back. I was getting regular chest pains and I think the pace of life plus little sleep was going to kill me.

Thanks all for these replies - glad I’m not the only one who would rather have the time!

school hours for 4 days is a good option though, I think it’s the rushing around at drop off/pick up that I find most stressful on the days I work plus I’d save a significant amount of after school club especially once I have 3 there.

deep down I know I should pay the debts off first but realistically that’s probably a couple of years away and selfishly I don’t want to wait! Haha

I'd recommend working Mondays as then you get them off for bank holidays!

I used to work four days in term time and three days in school holidays. That used to work well because it was always a bit quieter in the school holidays because lots of other people were off.

That was the point I came on to say, for me, having non mortgage debt would not equate to living comfortably on a non full time salary. I would probably only consider dropping hours if we had no debt, a good emergency fund (6-12 months expenses) and were putting a substantial amount into pensions every month.

That said, my full time job only takes about 20 hours a week WFH so I don’t REALLY know what I’d do in your situation.

I work a Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, I prefer to get it out of the way in one go and have a long weekend every week!