To not believe them but pretend

[Chester23]

I received a text from someone along the lines of "what would you do if someone told you they had feelings for you? Would you stop talking to them?" I was like wtf and didn't reply for a while. I finally answered with feel awkward exactly like I do right now.

They are now telling that they were asking for my opinion. If that was the case surely you'd give context first. I work with this person, they are older than me and I am similar age to their daughter. I have 0 feelings for this person. I am in a long term relationship. I do tend to get on with men more having been brought up with more male influence. I also used to work in a pub so tend to ignore inappropriate comments.

I'm unsure what to do tomorrow? Do I carry on like normal or step back a little from this friendship?

It's not a friendship, not to him. Friendly but not friends is how I'd manage it.

I just hope he doesn't bring it up. I will do the speak if spoken to situation

It would creep me out and I would step back a little.

It did creep me out. Hence the reason I never replied for ages. I'm dreading tomorrow now

So inappropriate. I would consider mentioning it to a senior female member of staff.

Unfortunately I work in a factory that is dominated by men. In my department there is only 5 females. But all general operatives. All team leaders are men. Manager is male too

I'm really not sure why you're asking me about this, and I to be honest I don't feel comfortable having this conversation with you. Maybe speak to one of your friends and not someone young enough to be your daughter. See you at work tomorrow.

I did reply saying I felt awkward with the situation he just put me in which is when he told me he was just asking my opinion and someone else said it to him.

Edit: I also told him this is a weird question to ask someone

No more replies needed then.
Just go and do your job as normal tomorrow. Avoid being just him and you if possible.
Save all texts just in case there are any issues.

Thank you

None of this is your doing. Bulldoze it out (like a man?) and let him feel awkward.

I am quite good at ignoring comments but this kind of situation always makes me feel awkward.

You will feel awkward, but you have to mask it and carry on and not in any way try to resolve this. This is his shit show, not yours

I think you dealt with it well. I’d tell my partner because if I didn’t I’d feel I was hiding something (sucks to be put in that situation), then I’d cool the friendship and style it out. Head high, let him feel awkward. I wouldn’t be telling any managers personally as I’d feel ok to brush it off.

At best this is immature behaviour from a grown man. Save the texts, don't be alone with him, and just be professional from now on.

I would have replied “Hi, think you sent this text to the wrong number!”.

Remember:

HE made it weird — not you. You’ve got nothing to be freaked out about and you don’t need to act weird or anything.
Just be yourself and if he approaches you, tell him to stop acting like you’re his best friend.
Then walk away.
End of.

Say nothing further. He won't tell the truth and if you corner him might get abrasive and vengeful. Back off slowly and carefully.

Are they more senior than you at work?
Men can often turn nasty when rejected so I'd tread carefully.
Totally ignore the text and yes to be friendly but not friends.

Yes by 1 level but at the minute not in charge of me.
Fingers crossed he's too busy to bother with me today, we're behind because of the Microsoft issue.

That old chestnut of "asking for someone else". Like hell!

I'd dial back any friendship or banter and just be completely professional and, as you say, only respond when spoken to. Short concise responses. Does this man know you're in a relationship already?

Men never give up do they? Doesn't matter how old they are. Grey rock him as much as possible.

Good luck today and let us know how you get on

He was testing the water to see how you'd react, you didn't react positively so he's made up a story about him asking on someone else's behalf.
I'd be very surprised if he broached the subject again, hopefully he'll be too embarrassed.
Go to work, chin up and act normally

Yes he knows I'm in a relationship.

He tried to speak with me about it this morning. I was already on my way to another department so (a little rudely) waved him off and carried on my way. He keeps coming to speak with me about work, and slipped a how was your weekend in. I ignored this and answered the work question. It's not like I can avoid him completely, my job feeds into his line.

So by half way through the day I think he got the point. He kept bringing it up, I told him again it was weird and to stop bringing it up. But... he's now text me again. Saying sorry etc. I have ignored this message. I feel like answering saying I've asked you to stop bringing it up