Anyone with a toxic sister ...

[dupess]

Is it awful to go such low contact that our relationship is now practically gone.
She is an alcoholic and when drinking heavily gets nastier, more hurtful, more itchy and devious.

She has a knack of manipulating situations that you swear you won't get sucked into and then you find yourself totally sucked in, resentful and bitter.

I feel sorry for her I do but she has the majority of family feeling sorry for her and picking up the pieces of her shit decisions.
She went one step too far recently when she really insulted and hurt me.

I know logically that this is about her self loathing and lack of self esteem .. her addiction I suppose..
I know tha this isn't about me but it almost seems that when I am
Down or my life is hard, she thrives on this.
When I'm on my uppers she leaves me alone.

Would it be awful to cut her off completely. I will be in a situation this week where I will be in her company a lot but there will also be lots of family and friends around too.

I have cut all contact with my toxic sister.

I do not miss her at all, and although I'd be prepared to be polite and civil if I met her at a family do, she won't. She's a narcissist who has caused so much drama over the years and is a master of DARVO.

I find it much easier to not have her in my life accusing me of being dreadful and hurtful to her - if things don't go entirely her way then I'm the bad guy. I'd rather just not have any contact at all. It's much more peaceful.

I have written about this before. My sister has always been nasty to me and bullied me as a child. We were never very close.
She told me at my daughter’s funeral that she would never see me again (she disagreed with how we arranged it).
She has kept her word and I have not seen or heard from her since.
Although very hard at the beginning, I do feel a kind of peace now that I no longer have to deal with her as at times I would feel quite panicked.
I have always envied friends who are close to their sisters, go shopping together and have sisterly chats as I have never had that.
I hope you find your own path, OP.

Me.

Life is so much more peaceful since I ceased contact with my narcissistic sister.

Every 2-3 years I get an email suggesting we have a fresh start, every time it gets my hopes up and every time I am first required to apologise for my behaviour/general existence. She has spent her entire life blaming everyone else for every single thing.

It must be utterly exhausting especially coupled with the lies. I think she plays out scenarios in her head so much that they become real to her and no one else has an idea what she’s going on about. She’s also extremely manipulative so very much a handle with care person.

My sister treated me like shit for as long as I can remember, until one day I snapped and refused to put up with it anymore. Not spoken to her for 12 years, best decision I ever made.

I have a very toxic brother I call Toxic Tim. He is the king of passive aggressive behaviour and refuses to take responsibility for his own life. I haven't cut him out completely but I am extremely low contact. I only keep in touch because he is living in mum's flat for free despite doing no maintenance on it. I have applied for guardianship for mum because he didn't want to so I will have ultimate control on her finances. I am very vague about stuff at the moment and he hates that despite not wanting to be involved. He's happy to complain though!

Yep. I have one. Cut contact after she told me that she knew of all the ‘disgusting’ things I did with men, as told to her by my niece, ex prostitute and who left uk after running up big debts on credit cards. I haven’t had an eventful orgy of hedonism so can only imagine niece is painting me with her own exploits.

sister doesn’t know about niece being a prostitute, btw, as I’ve not shared this info so niece could have fresh start in Spain.

I asked sister what are these disgusting things I’ve allegedly done. Apparently, so disgusting she can’t repeat.

My toxic dsis went nc with me when dm told me £10k was missing from her account I tried to politely advise her she may get in trouble depreciation of assets etc if dm need care in the future

she’s since removed me as poa got dm to change her will and done equity release on dm house as well as continuing to help herself to money

so I am definitely nc with her now and she’s being investigated

she describes me to her friends a bit like the op post i am apparently jealous of her as she is far more successful than me has traveled further I am really not jealous she’s up to her eyes in debt has been subsidised all her adult life and she’s clearly lying to all her friends where she’s getting money from hopefully it will all come out soon

My sister too. Gone v low contact so it’s purely transactional. The relief!