Starting a social group for autistic young adults / teens

[LanaL]

I have an autistic son , he’s 17 . We have been going to a social group for a few years now , but I feel like he may be outgrowing it. Most of the children there are younger and as he’s almost an adult , although in age only really , I feel like friendships with people his own age are more appropriate and would be better for him.

I know of a few people with teens / young adults , who are also struggling with this - with trying to find friends for their children but not really knowing how to do this.

So, I had an idea to start a weekly social group for 16+ ( maybe 16-25 ) - just a safe place for them to come, interact , “ hang out “ . Something where parents stay but they can just be teens really. I thought maybe a hall somewhere , some snacks, some sensory bits , maybe a PlayStation or something , a little bit of quiet music. There isn’t really anything like this around . I put the feelers out on a local Facebook group and there was a lot of interest .

I don’t have money to fund this . I could maybe do a bit for the first week - the hall hire, some bits to do but then would see how it goes , charge maybe £5 per child and then use that for the next weeks hire and so on .

Any idea how to start with this ? I don’t think I would be able to get any kind of funding until it was established but I wondered if I could approach any businesses for donations - sensory items, maybe an old console etc ?

If you have a teen / young adult - would this be something you would find useful ? What would you like to see there ?

It would also be a place for parents to meet other parents in the same situation , have people to talk to etc and maybe down the line lead to some friendships being formed and days out etc.

I think this sounds like an excellent idea. Do the National Lottery still fund this sort of thing? Even quite a small donation would probably be enough to get you going, and then once the word got round and it was well attended, it would hopefully pay for itself.

It sounds like a great idea but who would you be aiming it at ?
I know of few places that try and do a one size fits all group activities for people with autism and it doesn't doesn't really work because the spectrum is so huge
I think you would need to be very specific about what you offering because whilst it wouldn't suit my severely autistic non verbal teen
I can see that it might be a good resource for other.s

Excellent idea. I wonder if there is somewhere existing for younger or NT kids that you could 'piggyback' off eg asking if they could offer a night per month for your target group?

https://www.expresscic.org.uk/about-us

This group operates something similar local to me. DS never attended, but we did consider it. They seem like nice people though, so I'm sure would give you advice if you asked.

I think this is a great idea. Would suggest providing opportunities for parallel play/activities - so maybe board/card games alongside the console. My son wouldn't go to a "social group" but he'd be happy "going for a game and a drink/snack" if you see what I mean.

We looked for DD. There were things for NT and things for 'won't ever be independent SN' but nowhere for in-betweens.

This OP.
You should start small, have a bit of structure to help people get along, and have a good understanding of your target audience.
You don't need a massive hall with music/toys/playstation/etc to start with.
Maybe hire a small room in some office buildings or similar that's not too noisy, have some board and card games.

Also does your son have any specific interests? Could this be a better way to go?

He does , but quite niche … he really just wants to be able to walk around with his friends , go outside without adults , which he can do at his current one as it’s safe - kind of just being a teen / young adult but safely. However , lately due to the age of others , it’s getting harder … he’s making friends with children under 16 as that’s all that are there and I think he needs friends his own age

This is it. My son can’t have a lot of independence , but he can have some . I don’t know if he will ever live alone unsupported but I’m hopeful . So he’s not fully independent but he’s also not completely not independent. He’s the in between .

Yes , definetly. I thought maybe a quiet area , some books and games , then just some other tables with snacks etc so they could choose and I would like a fair bit of space so those that want to be alone can be and then just see how it goes and adapt

This is a good idea !

Sounds like a brilliant idea - I think young autistic adults have the worst of both worlds in many ways, so I really hope you can get something off the ground to help your son and others like him.

I think I would explain it as a group for Autistic teens / young adults , 16-25 , who want to meet others in a relaxed environment … it might be that more severely , non autistic teens could come along - their parents get to chat to other parents , but with some small bits to do .. even if they just want to walk around , somewhere that is “safe” - a large function room maybe, with one entrance - that we can keep closed , and maybe some closed space at the back , so that it’s safe and those that want to be without the adults can but if any do manage to leave unattended , it’s safe . It would obviously be a “ parents responsibility “ group

Ask your GP surgery how to get in touch with your local Social Prescribing Service. I’m a Social Prescriber for a Primary Care Network of 9 surgeries and have helped set up three social groups where individuals have identified a need.

Also try and find the Council for Voluntary Service (CVS) that covers your area as you will need to have insurance, governance, a bank account, etc and they can help with this. Once those are in place you can apply to all sorts of local funding pots.

Good luck!

Contact the NAS (national autistic society) might have some advice and also be a way of reaching out to target group.

I set up a very similar group and we had some success. We linked up with a cafe that was run by Mencap. They let us use it once a week in the evening.

We started with a takeaway night, as there were a few takeaways on the same road. We planned a games night which went OK. We asked everyone to write down what they would like to do.

The problem I found was as mentioned by pp, the huge spectrum. We had some young people who were independent and wanted to go out to bowling etc.

We had some that needed a parent/carer with them, dd in her 20s is in Supported Living and has to be accompanied by someone. The dynamics were tricky.

It kind of fizzled out sadly, I found the parents more keen than the actual young people!

I've also seen a similar group but for all disabilities. Again, it's tricky to find something for everyone. My dd didn't like doing the typical crafty things but struggled to sit and make conversation, and "just hang out." Karaoke and bingo were not quite her thing either.

I don't mean to sound really negative and I think it's great that you're going to try. All the best with your venture.

Hi OP,

My autistic 17 year old joined a Dungeons and Dragons group at college, which has basically turned out to be a self-selecting social group for autistic teenagers. D&D and other table top games are brilliant for autistic teens. I have many theories about why! My teen has made some good friends through it. Newcomers are free to just observe until they feel comfortable to join in.

Promoting it as simply a young person's group (but making it about an activity that tends to attract a high proportion of ND members) might be worth thinking about - at least as a starting premise? My teen was reluctant to go to anything openly aimed at autistic teens as it felt 'patronising' to her (her words).

Just a thought!

There's something like this near me, a youth club for neurodiverse young people. I believe they have a membership fee and they are supported by local businesses and some council funding. They have open times for hanging out and then themed events like gaming, sewing, etc. Great idea.