To be annoyed that my son is being labelled as "future ASBO material"

[Wallace]

Relatives and friends are always going on about how he is "the naughty one" out of my children, how he is "a handful" and "will be trouble"

I must say, all of this is said rather admiringly as ds is a brilliantly full-on exuberant character. I do wish people wouldn't only notice and comment on this aspect of his personality, nobody seems to notice when he is playing nicely.

Ok, he is very loud, prone to running off, a bit violent, rather cheeky, and doesn't often always do as he is told...

...but he is only 20 months old

20 months?

sheesh! I was all set to reassure you about your six or seven year old.

But 20 months?

Awww, I bet he's dead cute, isn't he? I have one like yours. He's just a little boy (with the operative word being "boy")

Bit early to be trying for an ASBO isn't it? Take the pressure off him before you start setting such targets.

Sorry, couldn't resist. I wouldn't worry about it, "ASBO" is just another over-used word in the modern vocabulary.

"he is very loud, prone to running off, a bit violent, rather cheeky, and doesn't often always do as he is told..."
Isn't that the definition of a 20 month old boy?

DS was exactly like that at 20 months - now 20 years old has turned into a perfectly respectable law-abiding citizen...

LOL at us pushy parents coaching or kid for an ASBO

He is so cute, and bloody hilarious , a real little boy

I do try to mention o people that he isn't that badly behaved really...

FFS - I'd be concerned if a 20month old was perfectly behaved at all times!!!!

I have a nephew who the whole of one side of the family have always said (even in frint of him) that he's backwards, how slow he is and he's not very bright just because he was a slow talker.

He's a gorgeous little boy whi just needs people to interact with him and stop telling him no all the time - but thats a different thread all together.

In answer to the OP, there are just some people out there who like to label kids ASAP. Don't let them worry you. Boys often tend to be a little more boisterous (not always mind you) just try and direct some of his energy into something useful - playing a sport (a bit young at the moment I know!) or something.

He sounds just like my ds! He's 17 months old & I have to admit that after 3 girls (who weren't even particularly quiet themselves) he has come as a bit of a shock.

'tis a boy thing

I net he's gorgeous and he sounds just like my DS (almost 19) They were both exactly like that at your DS's age and they are both brilliant. How many other 18 year old males do you know that has never brought any trouble home, nevr involved in any problems at school - is/was a grade A* student, can cook and clean properly (without being asked), does the ironing for the entire family every week without fails, has amazing taste in women (his girlfriends have all been nice, but this one seems to be sticking and she's lovely (seems like one of the family), is loving and affectionate, gets up ni the morning to take GS (age 5) to school two mornings a week so I can have a lie in.
Ignorethem all - they obviously know he's gonna turn otu great and they're jealous

net? BET

wish I could type properly haha

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YANBU,. Thats is normal behavior for a 20 month old.

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"Relatives and friends are always going on about how he is "the naughty one" out of my children, how he is "a handful" and "will be trouble""

A boy? Aged not quite 2? Running around? Being boisterous? Being a bit loud? Not listening? Heaven forbid!

Do your relatives/friends have shares in a Ritalin factory or something?

Can't do a lot about relatives - but it sounds as if you need some new friends...

He's 20 months - if it's not a problem to you, it's not a problem.

Silly to say things like that about a child who isn't even 2.
FWIW, my eldest son was a complete nightmare between 1-2 and a half, very rough, physical and naughty but he's now in Year 1 at school, in top sets for maths and english, has loads of friends and I've never had a bad word said about him (plenty when he was tiny though such as "little sod" from one parent).

YANBU - my auntie told me repeatedly my DD was spoilt at 16mos, because she cried for milk Relatives!!!

I hate it when people label kids like this

We get these comments about DS3 and it does make me cross. He is 3 and yes he is far more mischevious than the other 2 (DS1 was an absolute angel - 14 now and still not a bad boy)

DS3 doesn't listen much, does do things I'd rather he didn't, but he is cute , adorable, loving and can be very good (as far as nursery is concerned)

It is just their character. I'd rather DS3 was mischevious than nasty and hitting people all of the time (like my neighbours son) He is just lovely and has loads of fun.

People can't wait to label and pigeonhole your kids. Apparently my DS is going to be like his cousin who is "unaffectionate" just because he squawks when MIL suffocates him with cuddles and kisses. He is only 20 weeks!

Your DS sounds fab .

Ok, he is very loud, prone to running off, a bit violent, rather cheeky, and doesn't often always do as he is told...
..but he is only 20 months old

I think thats what we used to call....normal behavior

If he is like it at 12 you have a problem

Labels do have a tendency to become self-fulfilling prophecies. I am one of four girls and I think we all pretty much lived up to our early childhood labels. One sister sensible and kind, another bookish, another beautiful and one artistic and dreamy (that's me).

I think therefore it's important that you spin his exuberance as something positive as opposed to negative.

He is energetic, sporty, a big personality, a character, a charmer, outgoing, friendly etc.

Make sure your family spin him in a positive light. And make sure you do it too.