To ask 2 adults 2 teens - what size house?

[ftb1]

Ok.
I'm early 40's and live in the South East. I've never been able to afford to buy but have recently inherited a sum of money which will enable us to buy (not out right). It is sad that we've had to suffer a bereavement for this to happen.

We currently rent a small three bed semi, the smallest room is a box room.
We are pretty minimalist so resist the urge to buy too much stuff. Even so, we struggle with space. We are looking forward to buying.
We've started looking at properties and the lowest end of our budget would enable a detached three bedroom house each with double bedrooms. The top end of our budget would enable us to have a four bed detached with a study ( I work from home) which is very tempting. Our eldest is 17 so will leave home in the coming years. Youngest is 12.

I keep thinking to go forna property at the lower end of our budget as it would mean we have more cash available to enjoy life and help out two boys get in the property ladder when the time comes. We're not big earners and happy to drive old cars but we buy them with cash. We don't have any debt.

So, for those of you with a similar size family to mine what sort of size property do you manage with? I am so looking forward to having more space than we currently have but likewise I want to try and moderate ourselves and think about how our family will change over the next few years if that makes sense.

It's just me and my 2 primary age kids in my house so not the same at all but if you can afford the 4 bed I would go for that. Don't underestimate the value of having your own space to work. We are in a decent sized 3 bed semi which is great for us but if I had the money I would buy a bigger house. At the moment I work in the 3rd bedroom and my kids share but I'm going to sort out a garden office for when they get older and have their own rooms. Not all gardens are big enough to do that though, particularly with newer build houses.

At a similar stage in life and hoping to buy soon, thinking my ideal home would be a 2-3 bed house with attached apartment that could be used for grown up kids, married kids coming home to visit, or if empty can rent it out as a short term let.

I wish I had bought a larger house. I assumed DC would move out as I did, at least by 22. They didn't! Rents are too high. Also I didnt foresee WFH.

We are cramped.

I absolutely won't allow partners in my house though. I am not making them that comfortable.

I’d go for the 3 bed based on this, if they are all double rooms that’s plenty. Then you have more money for the better quality of life

What ever? Under any circumstance?

Where would you like me to put them? I am in London. Should I give up use of my own bathroom for a stranger? I don't really believe in moving into your parents' house with partners.

I'd go for a three bed, so long it has good size bedrooms, with a decent size garden. I'd then put in a garden office/summer house for working from home.

It'll be better to have more money left to spend on other things as you need them. When your children do move out it won't be too big but there will be space for potential grandchildren and guests in the future.

We are two adults and two 17 year olds, recently bought a semi with three double bedrooms, but we also prioritised other spaces in the house, so we have a utility, a garden office, a home office, ensuite for us, main bathroom for the teens and a workshop for DH. We felt that would mean we didn't all feel on top of each other in the house, and because downstairs is open plan dining/kitchen/front room, we could also be in the same space whilst doing different things, which has worked really well with older teens. We were incredibly lucky with the house we found though and our neighbours are lovely, so the detached thing didn't bother me too much.

4 bed + 2 bathrooms will be a more comfortable life if you end up in a situation with 4 adults living together. This could well be the case for your kids after higher education if you're in the south east.

Go top end; but 4br, no study. The 4th room can be multi-purposed. Ours (smallest, a single room) is a wfh room 2 days a week, my sewing room and arts space, plus cat bedroom.

Be aware that your 17 year old is highly likely to move home post uni these days. You'll be glad of the space.

We are 4; me, DH and working DS, 25; and newly graduated DS, 23.

Or 6 adults!

Are all the bedrooms in the 4 bed a good size ? Is the garden important to you ? Are the houses in equally good areas ? Do you regularly have people to stay ? Answer all the questions and make your choice , how other people live is irrelevant particularly as the houses you are looking at are all bigger and better than your current house .

Ah you didn’t say moving in, you just said you wouldn’t allow them in your house.

maybe I’m too literal. I was just picturing you never allowing your kids partners to stay, even if moved out, married or been together 20 years.

Three double bedrooms is plenty. I would not push to your limits and instead use the rest to help your sons with uni costs etc. in the future.

@toomanytonotice sorry for the confusion. I was sort of responding to pp whose DCs partner has been living with her for 5 years. I would obviously allow anyone to stay for a night or two, just not move in.

That 3 bed sounds plenty. It's sounds spacious and there's a room you can use as an office and storage as well as an occasional dining room.

Why stretch yourself for a house that's much larger than your long term needs.

I think you should buy a home based on your current needs and not based on when your children will leave home. Realistically, your may stay with you to at least 25.

Also consider when your children start working they may need space to work as well.

Considering you’ve coped well in smaller I’d go for the property that is smaller and you can definitely afford and have a good life. You don’t wand to be struggling with a mortgage. Is there anything else about the house that is different such as locations?

I would definitely look beyond just detached properties. Unless you really, really dislike having neighbours. Your money goes so much further with a semidetached.

We are fine in a 3 bedroom house of the 1930s "box room" type but 1. Really need our garage for storage and 2. Have had to add a garden office as WFH space. Things to consider - do you need separate reception rooms or an office, do you need a guest room eg for visiting grandparents. We only have an upstairs bathroom but this limits some relatives from visiting us for mobility reasons. So I guess it's not just the teens but wider lifestyle.

There is no such thing as too much space IMO.
I'd go for more separate rooms rather than actual floor area.
When my DC went to uni they came back and forth for 3 years, then lived at home again for 2 more years during which they needed somewhere to wfh.
A 4th bedroom can be used as an office / spare room leaving the downstairs study as a separate sitting room.

Three bedroom sounds ample for your needs. The relief of not having a mortgage sooner rather than later cannot be underestimated!

Go 4 bed , it could be quite a while before either of your children leave permanently, they could even move out and back several times