Expectations of buying teacher Christmas and end of year presents.

[Stargazingmummy]

So I have mixed feelings on this. I'm all for celebrating and thanking teachers when they really go out of their way to help my child. I have bought gifts and contributed to gift collections. However my issue is why should I contribute to collections for teachers that work 2/3 days a week who haven't particularly done anything out of the ordinary for my child. Their communication is shit and I get very basic information that could relate to any child.
The collections for the teachers raised around £90 per teacher.
AIBU.
YANBU.

You don’t have to contribute. Teachers neither notice nor care who has and hasn’t contributed. They don’t expect gifts in the slightest and are happy with a nice card if that’s what you want to do. Any pressure to contribute is coming from other parents, not teachers. I am a teacher btw!

Teachers don’t expect gifts by the way. I always love a handmade card… the best present I ever got was a hand made book mark as the child knew I love to read.
You don’t have to get anyone a present if you don’t want to

Exactly this!

If you’re not happy, don’t contribute. Even if you are, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.

Last year I bought a voucher for the teacher and the TA.

This year the WhatsApp group was full of parents asking what the TAs name was. I sent a card but no voucher because if I don’t know their name, they’ve not worked with my child much.

I go by level of involvement and difference made. But generally I compare the work they do to the £75 a day nursery fee for my youngest and think an end of year voucher seems far too little to express how grateful I am for the work they do.

I do agree that there feels like there is an expectation and with two children and teaching assistants and child care providers to think about it felt quite expensive

I was nearly always happy and pleased with my teachers. A couple of staff I didn't really gel with. I never bought a gift for any of them . Don't think they cared.

Think of it like any other tip. Do so if exceptional service or simply because you want to. But not everyone tips and it's fine not to.

I’m a teacher and whilst we’re so so so grateful for cards and gifts, we don’t expect them and nor do we notice who doesn’t get one! Children write you notes on the last day telling you how much they love you which is enough for me!

To be honest it annoys me that people complain a lot about this. There is absolutely no obligation. It's a gift. I teach pre school and love the gifts I get but wouldn't ever expect them or make any judgement on someone who doesn't gift. I usually contribute to my kids teacher fund because I choose to and we have had some amazing teachers, but one year I thought DS teacher was lazy and no way was I buying him anything. No one cared but it made me feel satisfied. Likewise, this year i bought a personal gift for an SNA that I admire and felt really good about myself.

I think it's more a pressure from the WhatsApp parent groups as they really are keen to show who has contributed and who hasn't. It does get expensive as I also have "contributions" at work for colleagues birthdays and if I don't contribute, you kind of look cheap or tight fisted.

Then don't. Pretty easy.

On the last day of term another teacher bash. Jesus can we have a day off

This. I'm a retired teacher. I had no expectations of gifts.

I bet half of it is the mums one-upping each other on who can get the best gift 😂 I know a group of people like this.

My DS is only 2 so I do birthday and Christmas for our childminder as she’s AMAZING and id be lost without her.

DH is teacher and HOY. In his secondary usually just the leavers that might bring a gift, so Yr 11 or Yr 13.

They don't expect anything and when he does get anything he loves it if it’s something the student chose themselves, however random, or just a note they write or a card etc.

No gifts this year, last year had loads as it was his ones he’d been with when the school opened from Yr 7 to Yr 13 bless them.

When I was in school people used to take the piss and say I was teachers pet for bringing or making gifts for my favourite teachers 😂

I wonder if they still have any of the things I used to make for them

Don't contribute. There's been a few times where I've sat them out because I'v personally felt the teacher hasn't been great. Yes messages go around about whose contributed etc but just ignore them. Equally there have been times where I haven't contributed because I'v wanted to do something more personal for teachers I'v found great.

We didn't ever give teacher gifts tbh.
I did support teaching staff by getting involved where I could, eg helping on school trips and school fayres and that sort of thing.

this - teachers dont want gifts!

If you're feeling pressure from the WhatsApp group, just say 'I'm doing my own thing, thanks' (and don't get anything). Cards from children with sweet messages are very valued.