Feel so sad that I've had to rehome my dog to my parents

[elm26]

I've had him for 9 years, he is a sprocker spaniel and the most amazing, loyal, beautiful natured boy. He is well trained and has never caused us any issues.

He's been with me through multiple miscarriage, anxiety and depression. He's been by my side through it all and I love him so much.

Ever since our 1 year old DD was born, he hasn't been himself, he stopped playing, stopped bringing us toys, he mopes around and seems genuinely sad.

He is always gentle with her, I don't let her hassle him, she is allowed to stroke him when we say she can but he seems permanently stressed by the general chaos of the place, the noise, the toys. He has his own corner with his crate, bed, food and water that DD isn't to go near.

I noticed that when we visit my parents on the weekend (they adore him and take him on holiday with them for a week a year, he also stays some weekends if we have plans that means that we will be out of the house for more than a few hours), he starts his playfulness again, he takes himself out to the garden and lays in the sun (we have had to move into a first floor flat for the foreseeable), he is bouncy and playful again, the dog I used to know. As soon as we are home, he reverts back to wanting to be left alone, not interested in his toys etc.

So, my parents offered to rehome him and I've broke my own heart here agreeing to it because he is so much happier. He gets peace and quiet, he gets a garden, he gets undivided attention. I feel so guilty, sad, lost without him but I know (think?!) I'm doing right by him. He is getting old, he has arthritis, I just want him to spend his last however many years happy. We will still see him every weekend, we will be having him when they go abroad etc.

Have I done the right thing here? My heads all over the place.

@elm26 💐

You've done the right thing. The dog will be happier and you can still visit him.

I'm not normally one to agree with rehoming dogs as I think it's unbelievably cruel to uproot them from their home and family to somewhere new and unfamiliar.

However in this case I agree with everyone else on this thread.

If your parents adore your dog (and vice versa) and he is happy and comfortable with them then it's the right decision. They'll give him a lovely life and devote their complete attention to him I'm sure 😊

How brave of you and absolutely yes you have done the right thing. You have put his happiness above yours and at least you still get to see him. I wish every pet owner was like you.

I can't imagine how hard this must have been for you but it shows how much you love your dog. We adopted a nine-year-old cocker a few years back under the same circumstances. He settled in with us immediately and had five years of being spoilt rotten and being the centre of our world, and we kept in touch with his original owner and sent her photos and updates so she knew she'd done right by him. You'll still get to see and spend time with your boy, and putting his needs above your own is a brave thing and a sign of real love.

Yes you absolutely have done the right thing and well done (and massive hug) to you for doing it.

My brother has had to do the same recently due to a relationship breakdown. He's moved into a tiny one bed flat. His dog is now at our parents, going to the beach every day and loving their big garden and big house.

Dog will still love seeing you all and you'll always have a bond with him, but he's going to be happier in his daily life. Well done for being brave and doing the right thing.

Yes of course you've done the right thing! My neighbours had to do the same with their dog. Fortunately their parents live in the same village so everyone still gets to see each other, but a baby/toddler can be horribly stressful for a dog. Don't feel guilty at all. He sounds like he will make them very happy.

Well done, you have done the absolute best thing for your lovely dog. I can understand why you are sad, but it's a really great thing for both the dog and for your parents. You are really kind.

Bless you, what a loving thing to do for your boy. Absolutely the right thing but I'm sure it was desperately hard for you x

I feel your pain. We have the most beloved spaniel and that would break my heart. But you’ve done right by him. Absolutely the right thing to do. Well done.

You've 100% done the right thing OP. I did something similar with one of mine when she couldn't cope with the chaos of multiple rescue dogs/fosters. She was so much happier spending her final few years with my PILs. Like you, we saw her all the time and minded her when they went away.

It's hard for you but keep reminding yourself your boy would thank you for this if he could.

Think of your parents home as a dog retirement home with the best staff ever.

This made me teary. I work in the pet industry and it made me feel emotional that someone was so in tune with their dogs emotions, despite having their own challenges.
And not only that, you have found the perfect solution ..your parents who love him and will care for him and he will still be part of your life.

Well done, you should be proud.

You’ve done exactly the right thing. You’ve let him go because he’s happier there, even though it’s breaking your heart. You put his needs first. That’s the definition of a good owner.

It must be very hard for you. Be kind to yourself.

As a rescue owner this has brought tears to my eyes because you are a wonderful dog owner and have put him (and your child) first. It must break your heart but you are in such a great position, he’s going to people you know, who will love him and give him everything he needs and you have the bonus of being able to see him still.
Very few rescues have this level of contentment.
Give yourself a big pat on the back for doing the right thing and a big hug too. You’ll realise in time what a good decision it was.

I love that.

You've shown how much you love him by putting his needs first. He will be staying with Granny but he'll always be your boy. You'll see him every weekend and know he'll be happy lounging around in his garden. You are an excellent dog owner.

It sounds like you’ve done right by him and put his needs above your own, which is a selfless and loving act. It sounds like he’ll be very happy with your parents and you’ll get to see him regularly.

You have done the right thing. I'm sorry you're sad, but he isn't, and you can still see him - he's loved and cared for in all directions! I took on a dog last year as his owner couldn't cope with him and a new baby, she didn't want to see him anymore as it would hurt too much, but we keep in contact about him. ❤️

You have unfortunately I know it’s hard but if he’s that unhappy it’s just not fair on him. And at least you’ll be able to visit him and I’m sure if your parents want to go away etc you can look after him for them. He might even like the baby when he’s space from her etc,

That’s true love OP. You’ve put his needs before your own. Happy dog, and you still get to see him.

You've put him first. Be happy you've made him happy. You can still see him!

You absolutely have done the right thing for him. So bloody hard for you though.

I just wanted to give an update!

Firstly, thank you all so so much for your kind words. I did read them but I couldn’t bring myself to reply, I felt awful and sad for a long time.

Our boy is so happy and so loved, we see him every weekend and he jumps all over the place excited to see us and even our DD. We get WhatsApp’ed pictures of him fast asleep on his back with all legs in the air on the sofa, pictures of him wet and muddy after a long walk and he is back to his relaxed but playful self.

I cried for a good few months and I still miss him being here even now but it was the right decision for him and for us.

Aww, you poor thing. You have done the right thing by him, so well-done you