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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it an unhealthy obsession ( anime )

9 replies

Hyperandchaos · 18/07/2024 12:08

Hi
I suppose I’m trying to navigate my first DC growing up.
She is going in to her last year at primary school and for around 2 years ago became fixated on anything Japanese related which then led to manga / anime.
I started of fairly strict with this and what she was able watch but will admit have got a bit slack on this because it’s all she wants to watch.
I still don’t allow many of the shows but she has watched a fair few.
In some ways it’s been so helpful to her as she had made friends with similar interests where as before she was fairly Isolated where as now we have a regular group of friends that meet up and go to anime conventions / talk on the phone.
her reading was always a challenge, she really struggled with phonics but then anime with subtitles and manga books meant she has gone from being in year 3 but reception age reading to being in year 5 with year 4 reading.
she has developed art skills and Media skills. She sits and edits videos for hours.
I monitor her phone / computer every day and she is still very innocent in her chats and no worries there. However, it is all she does and talks about. She is always dressed in cosplay, she will only talk / read / draw anime. Her small circle of friends have the same interests but she apparently doesn’t really talk at school to others who do not share her interests and therefore school she is not socialising appropriately.
conversations at home always make it’s way back to anime no matter how many times we try to change it.
there is absolutely nothing else in the world she likes.
is this normal ?

OP posts:
andymary · 18/07/2024 12:12

Why would it not be normal, as long as it's all age appropriate?
Is it any different to being obsessed over Barbie and watching Barbie shows all the time? Or a child being obsessed with cars or trucks and watching, playing and talking about those all the time?

It sounds like she is very passionate, and good things are coming from it.

Nannyogg134 · 18/07/2024 15:02

My DD11 is the same- it started with Studio Ghibli (which I love too), and now she loves cosplay etc. We leaned into it, and all went to Comic Con in Glasgow it was brilliant! There's also an Anime and Gaming Con, but not near enough to us unfortunately. It's not unhealthy, as long as it's all age appropriate then I say why not.

Happyinarcon · 18/07/2024 15:08

Try to stay involved with what she’s reading and watching online. I don’t want to get into a bun fight but there can be some peculiar content floating around

shiverm · 18/07/2024 15:40

I can't comment on normal but ahhh I'd absolutely love if my kid was into all this stuff (or my nieces as I have no kid). Passions sounds like a good thing. I've taught art & drawing to kids of different ages, and there are some who are obsessed with anime. As a kid (and adult) with passions, I can't help but think it's a good thing. Was told at art school that it's what makes a good artist.

Agree with the above poster though, monitoring wise. There definitely is some not child friendly stuff that still might at a glance look innocent.

Needmorelego · 18/07/2024 15:43

As long as you keep an eye on age restricted films/books/games - the same way you would with any other genre - then this is about one of the most normal things to be interested in.

Octavia64 · 18/07/2024 15:52

Yeah, pretty normal.

A lot of people got into Studio Ghibli over lockdown. I'm a teacher and I had a lot of street cred with my classes because I watched a lot of it.

At that point probably three quarters of the teens I taught were into anime so it's not really a niche interest.

However, unlike UK cartoons which are mostly for kids Japanese Manga and anime covers the full spectrum - so horror, romance, comedy, kids, etc. so you do need to be careful not to assume just because it is anime it's kid suitable.

Two of the most famous studio Ghibli - Totoro and spirited away are now musicals touring the world - I saw spirited away this year and have tickets for Totoro for next year.

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 16:02

If this is genuine I'll eat my chapeau

ntmdino · 18/07/2024 16:10

So...your daughter has a strong interest in a particular type of media, it's turned into a hobby for her where she's developing friendships and significant skills and talent, which - even if she's mediocre - are rare enough that they'll be sought-after should she choose to make a career in with them.

Who cares if it's "normal"?

Ask yourself this: do you think it's reasonable to think that anybody with a career in the animation/film world got there by just plodding along on the standard education treadmill? You could even expand that to "anybody with a career that they genuinely love, rather than tolerate for the sake of the money" and it'd still be mostly valid.

EllieQ · 18/07/2024 16:54

Your description does sound like she’s being very focussed on this one thing, which I think is unhealthy - I was similar at her age and looking back, having a wider social group would have been better, but I wouldn’t have accepted that at the time.

I agree with the previous poster than you need to closely monitor the shows she is watching, as not all anime is appropriate for her age. I’d also suggest you monitor her internet usage closely, particularly if she’s using online chats like Discord, or social media such as Tumblr. As @Happyinarcon says, some of the anime communities online have very adult (aka pornographic) themes. There’s also quite a lot of overlap with the furry community, which is also quite adult-themed.

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